


The Voices Within

by PattRose



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: AU, Angst, F/M, First Time, Kid Fic, M/M, Six Senses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-05
Updated: 2013-04-05
Packaged: 2017-12-07 12:26:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 60,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/748496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What will Dr. Blair Sandburg think of the patient that comes in to his office saying he hears voices in his head?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Voices Within

The Voices Within   
By Patt

 

Summary: What will Dr. Blair Sandburg think of the patient that comes in to his office saying he hears voices in his head?  
Fandom: The Sentinel  
Pairings: Jim/Blair Simon/Rafe Joel/Connor  
Warnings: Slash and bad language  
Beta: Kelly and Bluewolf  
Acknowledgments: Thank you, Tinnean, Margaret, Sheila and Helena for being here for me and helping me get through this writing challenge. And as always, thanks to Bluewolf and Kelly for the fine beta work.   
Word Count: 59,943

 

 

Cascade, Washington

Blair Sandburg sat in his small apartment off his office and wondered where he had gone wrong. It was his birthday and instead of spending it with his girlfriend and friends, he was spending it all alone in his apartment. He feigned that work was keeping him away, but it wasn’t work at all. He had a cupcake with one candle and lit the candle with care. He was 27 and still single and very lonely. How in the world did a Psychologist get to this place in his life? Blair thought he should be happy, should be thrilled with his life and happy with his friends, family and clients. Something was missing, though. 

First there was his mother, Naomi. She was a mess. She was still living in a time when cops were called pigs. Yes, his mother called them pigs. He was so proud. He grew up with his mother having that mentality and wondered how he ever came out alive. He smiled to himself because he knew he loved his mother dearly. She might be a mess, but she was his mess, damn it. She left him often when he was a child and he was raised by others in the community so he thought that most of his upbringing was from other people. This might have saved him. She still left him a lot when he started college at 15. He went two years without seeing her once and she never even checked on him. He got used to being alone, knowing she would just swoop in from time to time and say hello and then leave again. She called it detaching with love. Blair called it cruel when he was younger, but now that he was old enough to take care of himself, he believed she might have been right. She left him alone all of those years, but look how he turned out. He was smart, witty, friendly, sweet and people told him he wasn’t hard on the eyes. Now that, he knows he got from his mother. She was gorgeous. She had red hair that sparkled when the light hit it just right and her eyes were bright and beautiful. When this woman walked into a room, everyone noticed her and with good reason. She was very fond of Blair’s girlfriend, Susan Stafford. She whispered to Blair one night that she wished to have grand-children some day. Blair just blushed and told her to keep her nose out of his business. He had shared the fact that he was bi-sexual with his mother. But she looked at it like a challenge. Susan knew, but Susan really thought that she had him hooked on her and they would be an item until they were engaged. Between Susan and his mother, he didn’t have a fighting chance. But he knew one thing for sure. He didn’t want to settle down yet. He felt like there was someone out there for him, tailor made and he had a feeling it was a man. 

Blair really loved men. He didn’t mind being a bottom or a top, he was an equal opportunity gay person. He missed the dance scene with men, he missed the kissing with men, it was always so much more then with a woman. There was nothing like kissing another man and finding out he wanted you as much as you wanted him. Dancing with a man was hot, hot, hot. Blair was getting turned on just thinking about it. He had gone dancing with Susan a couple of times, but it didn’t take. He realized then that he was a man’s man. Now he just had to break that to her. 

He looked down and saw that his candle had melted into the cupcake. He laughed to himself and said, “Way to go, birthday boy.”

He got up, got himself another cupcake and put a candle in it and lit it. This time he didn’t think about anything except making his wish. He wanted to find the man that was waiting to be his. He wanted to find a man that would love him more then life itself. He wanted to be happy. That was enough to wish for and he blew out the candle. He smiled because he truly believed that something might come from it. He had received many wishes this way before. Why mess with a good thing. Sometimes Karma worked like a charm. 

Back to his mother. Naomi was going to have to be told to butt out of his and Susan’s life. Naomi was constantly interfering and telling Susan what to try and talk Blair into. Blair was sick of it. Susan was wonderful but not for Blair. She just wasn’t right for him. Oh who was Blair kidding? He wanted a man in his life, not a woman. The sooner he would tell Susan, the better. In fact, he needed to take her out and tell her. Maybe somewhere public where she wouldn’t throw such a fit. She was really good at throwing temper tantrums. It was hard to believe that she was older then Blair and telling him how mature she was all the time. When it came right down to it, he didn’t really even like Susan that much. Blair realized they were probably both just lonely and used each other. But Susan got swept up in it and thought there was more. Yes, Blair was going to have his hands full with Susan. 

Naomi was coming for a visit that weekend and Blair was going to tell her about his lifestyle change once again. If she didn’t like it, she could detach with love. Blair smiled at the thought and then snickered aloud. It was time for Naomi to actually stay out of his life. When he needed her, she wasn’t there. Now that he didn’t need her, she was always giving advice. 

Blair made two notes in his journal about his mom and Susan. He needed to break the news to both of them. Maybe he would do it when they were both there together. They could console each other. Blair snickered again and then thought about it a little more. Why couldn’t he do that? Naomi wouldn’t let Susan kill her son, so he’d be safe for one night anyhow. _‘Do I really think she would kill me? No, she’s just going to take it hard and cause trouble. She wouldn’t kill me.’_

Blair had quite a few friends but only one that he called his best friend. That was Jessica Woodruff, his assistant at the office. She was wonderful. He had other friends of course. He had gone to a movie with Cole Travers that last week and had a fantastic time. No, Blair did not suffer from lack of friends. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair grabbed a book off the shelf and began to relax and read. His favorite book was by Sir Richard Burton, the explorer, not the actor. He dreamed about finding a Sentinel all of his life, but knew that he would never find a full fledged Sentinel. He did find one in Peru that had four heightened senses and Blair studied him for a long while. But it wasn’t meant to be. It wasn’t like he could bring the Native back with him to the states. Instead he did his thesis on Bipolar Disorder. He had a lot of patients with Bipolar Disorder and felt like he was really helping them. He wasn’t just guessing, he knew he was helping them. 

Blair’s apartment was so unlike his office. His office was in a big building, in an old warehouse district. There were many professionals who had their offices and their apartments in the one place. From the outside it didn’t look that great, but the inside was gorgeous. Blair had spent a lot of time, trouble and money on getting his office to look exactly like he wanted it to. It needed to be a spacious place for all of the patients that had problems with being closed in. His waiting room was gigantic. It was 2,000 square feet of nothing but openness and comfortable seating. Even the two bathrooms were gorgeous and spacious. On the walls, he had some really nice artwork. He had dreams of wolves and black jaguars in a blue jungle, so he had different paintings done of wolves, jaguars and the two together in a blue jungle. They were perfect for the room. Patients commented on how warm and comfortable his waiting room was all the time. His office was much like his waiting room, very large and very comfortable. The leather chairs were so comfy that sometimes he took naps there. All you had to do was sit and relax and you would be sound asleep in moments. His patients also told him about this. He was glad that he had made his patients feel relaxed and rested when they were in his office. So to see Blair’s apartment, people would be shocked. It was two rooms off of his office. Small, but clean and he slept on a futon in his living room. His kitchen was all in the same room and very tiny. He rarely ate there because he usually ate out and brought things in for the week to heat up. Even his bathroom in his apartment was small. The shower barely fit him. Blair often wondered why he didn’t have a better place. He certainly could afford it. But he liked his little place and until he met Mr. Right, he didn’t want to make any moves unless it was in with Mr. Right. Blair snickered to himself again and wondered if all people cracked themselves up. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair’s phone rang and he answered on the second ring, hoping it wasn’t Susan. “Dr. Sandburg, can I help you?”

“Oh sweetie, I never tire of you saying that. I’m so proud of you, it’s amazing that you’re as grounded as you are being a hot shot doctor and all,” Naomi said with a smile in her voice. 

“Mom, it’s good to hear from you. Are you in town?”

“Yes, I am. I wanted to take you and Susan to dinner tomorrow night for your birthday. I knew you would be celebrating with friends tonight, so I figured I would take you two out tomorrow night,” Naomi said. 

“That would be great, but I don’t know about Susan yet. She might have plans,” Blair guessed. 

“I already called her and she said that tomorrow night was perfect for her. She couldn’t wait to see you.”

“Mom, I need to talk to you about something,” Blair started. 

“Sweetie, you know you can talk to me about anything you want to. What’s going on?”

Blair chewed his lower lip a little while he was thinking and said, “Mom, I want to be with a man.”

“Oh Blair honey, don’t be ridiculous. You don’t need a man when you have a wonderful woman like Susan,” Naomi argued. 

“Mom, don’t tell me I’m being ridiculous. I want a man in my life, not a woman, so Susan’s not going to fit. I’m going to tell her tomorrow night.”

There was dead silence on the phone for about two minutes and she finally said, “She thinks you’re going to ask her to marry her.”

“Why would she think that, mom? I’ve given her no indications of this happening. Why would she even consider that as an option?”

“It might be because I said something to her about children. I told her you didn’t argue with me last time I mentioned them and she agreed with me. She said she might be ready for settling down. I’m sorry honey; I thought I was doing you a favor by helping.”

“Well, tomorrow night you can help me tell her that we’re done,” Blair barked. 

“Oh sweetie, I don’t think it would be a good idea to break up with her at a restaurant. Let’s wait until we get back to my hotel room. Then you can tell her.”

“No, I’m going to call her now and explain why I can’t see her anymore. It’s not fair to take her out to eat, she’ll think there is more to come,” Blair explained. 

“Blair, you can’t break up with her over the phone, that would be almost as bad as faxing her the message. Wait until tomorrow and talk face to face,” Naomi urged. 

“Then we’ll meet at your hotel room and I will tell her then. She can leave or have dinner with us, but either way she’ll know that she’s not on the menu.”

“Blair, Blair, Blair… I think you’re making a big mistake. She’s a wonderful girl and so good for you.”

“Mom, did you miss the point about me wanting to be with a guy?”

“I guess you probably know your true feelings since you deal with feelings every day of the week. I just hope you’re not making a mistake. She might make trouble for you and your patients,” Naomi pointed out. 

“If she does, I’ll deal with it when the time comes. Now call her and tell her to meet at your hotel room. I’ll see you tomorrow. What time? And where are you anyhow?”

Naomi sighed. “I’m at Cascade Towers in room 202. Be here around six. I’ll tell her to come at 6:30 so we have a little time to plan for it.”

“We’ll see you tomorrow night, mom. Thank you for taking my news so well,” Blair said. 

“It’d take it better if you had some fantastic prospect in line for me to drool over,” Naomi teased. Naomi always loved the men that Blair had in his life. She had even gone as far as to try and seduce them, saying she wanted to be sure they were loyal to Blair. She just loved men. So Blair guessed he took after his mom after all. 

Blair smiled and said, “Night, mom.”

“Night, Blair.”

Blair set the phone down and walked into the closet to get his sheets and blanket. He was exhausted from talking to Naomi alone. He wasn’t looking forward to the next night that was for sure. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair got off the phone and Jessica called. “Hi Blair, what are you doing?”

“You wouldn’t believe it if I told you,” Blair said truthfully. 

“What? Were you just blowing out a candle or something?” Jessica asked. 

“That’s exactly what I did earlier. I was feeling sorry for myself,” Blair admitted. 

“Blair, I told you I was going to take you out for dinner tonight, but you said you wanted to stay home alone. Why did you lie?” Jess wondered. 

“I have no idea, but next time I turn down a dinner offer from my best friend, slap me upside the head, Jess.”

“So what happened besides that?”

“My mom called and I told her I want to break up with Susan,” Blair said. 

“All right. It’s about time. She wasn’t right for you. Actually I don’t think she was the right gender for you,” Jess teased. 

“I don’t know why I pay money to see a shrink, I could just talk to you. I told mom that I wanted a man in my life and she was appalled. She can’t believe that I’m going to dump Susan. She thinks Susan will make trouble.”

“She might, Blair, but we don’t care do we? You’ll be happier without her in your life, I can promise you that,” Jess assured him. 

What are you doing?” Blair asked. 

“I’m reading, why?”

“Go back to reading. I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” Blair said. 

“Bye, Blair.”

“Bye, Jess.” 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair got off the phone and realized that he would be lost without Jessica. He didn’t have many friends. Enough, but not too many. He had met her while he was in his last year at school and they had hit it off quickly. She wasn’t into him and he wasn’t into her. Blair was thrilled to have a friend that didn’t expect sex every time they turned around. Blair just wanted a friend that he could talk to and listen to sometimes. This is exactly what he got with Jessica Woodruff.

When he was finished with school, she asked if she could be his assistant and go to night classes. So that’s what they did. They had been together for four years. Jess was going to be a Psychologist too. Blair was so proud of her, it wasn’t even funny. She had many roles. Best friend, assistant and his study guide for many types of different treatment he would use in the office. Jessica meant the world to Blair and hoped that someday someone special would realize how special she was and grab her and never let her go.

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair was in the blue jungle again. He saw a very large Jaguar and knew he didn’t have to run. This jaguar didn’t go after him at all. There was a gentleness about him and there was nothing but kindness and sadness in his eyes. Blair wondered if this was somehow his mate. How would he know him in real life? He needed to find this lost soul. He knew he could help him. 

Blair felt like he should make another wish on his cupcake, but alas, he had eaten the last cupcake and he would just have to trust in fate. Kismet was a close friend of his.   
&&&&&&&&&&

Detective Jim Ellison from the Cascade Police Department was having some problems. He was going fucking insane and there was no one to help him or listen to him about it. Every time he tried to talk to a doctor about what was happening they gave him a sad, pathetic look and told him he needed more counseling. They didn’t realize that no amount of counseling was going to help him. Jim was very tired of trying to explain all of it to them. His boss. Captain Simon Banks had just about had it with him. Jim needed to find out what was wrong with him, so he could fix it and get on with his life. 

For some reason he could hear things that no one else could hear, he could see further then anyone would ever hope to see, he could smell things no one else smelled, (which got in the way of things quite a few times), his sense of touch was off the chart and his sense of taste was so high that he could hardly eat anything anymore. He found himself eating tapioca pudding for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And if this all wasn’t bad enough, now Jim could hear what people were thinking. Not saying, but thinking. 

While in an elevator that day, he smiled at the woman next to him and she ignored him. She was going to the top floor, so Jim knew she had something to do with the DA’s office. Jim stood there waiting to get to his floor and heard her say, _‘I just know he’s going to ask me to marry him tonight. I just know it.’_ Jim turned to her and realized she hadn’t said it out loud, he had heard her thoughts. Then she thought, _‘I’ve always wanted to be the wife of a Psychologist. I’m going to be very happy.’_ Jim shook his head trying to stop listening to her, but it was almost impossible. 

He tried moving farther away from her, hoping that would stop it, but it didn’t. She then went on to think about the sex they would probably have. Jim felt like a voyeur. He couldn’t be expected to work like this. 

He got off the elevator and breathed in a sigh of relief until a man walked up next to him and thought, “ _Wow, now that’s a nice looking guy. I would do him._ ” Jim almost ran from his side. Jim realized he was nuts. He needed to see someone and soon. 

When he got to his desk he sat down and hoped he wouldn’t hear anyone’s thoughts from the bullpen. But instead he was hit with everyone’s thoughts. Rafe was thinking about fucking Connor. Connor was thinking about how crude Rafe was and Brown was thinking about lunch. Joel came out and was thinking about the new coffee he had just brewed. Jim laid his head on his desk and thought, _I can’t work like this._

Simon opened up his door and yelled, “Ellison, my office.”

Jim just knew he was going to get fired. He walked in slowly and sat down waiting for the words to come out of Simon’s mouth or his mind. Simon stared at Jim and thought, _“He looks sane enough, but he’s losing it big time. He’s going to have to see someone or I’ll have to let him go.”_

Jim took this opportunity to say, “Simon, I think I need to see someone and take a medical leave of absence.”

Simon smiled and said, “Then that’s what we’ll do. I’ve got a doctor for you to see, I have a card and everything. I’m going to put you in for a three week leave and we’ll see what the doctor has to say. How does that sound, Jim?”

Simon thought, ‘ _This was easier then I ever hoped it would be. Thank God.’_

Jim smiled and said, “That’s fine with me. I’ll set up an appointment for as soon as possible and see him. Is it a man?”

“I’m not sure. The name is Blair Sandburg, but that could either be a guy or a woman. Call and find out,” Simon ordered as he handed the card to Jim. 

Jim smiled. He stood up to take his leave. “Thank you for everything, Simon. I know I’ve been a pain in the ass lately, but I promise I won’t come back until I’m back to normal.”

Simon thought, ‘ _Oh great, he’ll be back to his usual grouchy self.’_

“Maybe I’ll even be in a better mood for a change,” Jim said. 

Simon smiled and took Jim’s hand and shook it. “We can only, hope, Jim. Now take care.”

Jim walked out of Simon’s office. He cleaned up his desk area, and left without saying a word to anyone. That wasn’t that unusual. He rarely talked to anyone about anything, so no one would have even noticed. He did take his laptop and some files to work on. He would be safe at home. He wouldn’t be able to hear things there. He could try and work on the murder investigation he was working on right then. If he came up with anything brilliant he could call Connor and let her know. She was more or less his partner. 

The drive home was horrible. He could hear all of the road rage thoughts from every driver he went by. And then sometimes he had the ones that were thinking about what they were going to do to their wife when they got home. Jim was not amused one bit. This was getting old, very quickly. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Jim got home, he ordered some beef Lo Mein and hoped he’d be able to eat it. The thought of eating tapioca pudding was getting to him. 

He set up his lap top at the table and plugged it in. While it fired up, Jim got a bottle of water. He wanted a beer, but he wasn’t able to drink them these days either. He would be falling down drunk after one beer. Life was just no fun anymore. 

Jim suddenly remembered he had to call for his appointment with Blair Sandburg. He reached for the card and called. A very nice voice answered, “Dr. Sandburg’s office, may I help you?”

“Yes, my name is Jim Ellison and I need to schedule an appointment for as soon as possible with Dr. Sandburg. I’m on leave of absence with the police department and I need to see him soon.”

“You’re in luck, Mr. Ellison, someone just called and cancelled a new extended appointment, so I could pencil you in. It’s at 10:00 tomorrow. Could you make it that soon?”

“Yes, I would gladly make that appointment. Could you tell me if Dr. Sandburg is a man or a woman?”

Jim heard soft laughter. “If you only knew how many times I heard this question. Dr. Sandburg is a man. Is that still okay with you?” The nice voice answered.

“That’s fine with me, and who am I speaking to right now?” Jim asked nicely. 

“My name is Jessica Woodruff, just call me Jess. I’ve never actually had anyone ask my name. That was nice. I’m Dr. Sandburg’s assistant,” Jess answered. 

“It’s good to meet you, Jess. I’ll see you tomorrow. Should I come in early to fill out the paperwork?” Jim asked. 

“Maybe you should come tonight and get a head start on it,” Jess teased. 

“I was afraid of that. See you tomorrow,” Jim said and hung up the phone. He liked Jessica a lot. While he was talking to her, he heard her thoughts. She was worried about Dr. Sandburg rushing into something. Jim couldn’t understand what she was thinking about. He guessed he would find out the following day. 

Jim’s dinner came and he was able to eat about a half serving before it burned his mouth. He was so tired of being hungry. He sure hoped this doctor could help him. Jim cleaned up the dinner mess and sat down to his computer to see if he could find something to help Connor out. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair was dreading the evening. He knew that breaking up with Susan wasn’t going to be fun. But it was something he had to do. He arrived at his mom’s hotel room and smiled when she opened the door. 

“Look who’s here early?” Naomi said as a way of warning. 

“Susan, I thought we were meeting at 6:30?” Blair asked. 

“I couldn’t wait any longer. I had the best feeling about tonight, so I came early. I was just telling your mother about how much I love you,” Susan said. 

Blair sighed loudly. Susan looked troubled at the sigh and said, “What? You don’t love me?”

“Susan, I don’t think we’re going to work out. I never said I loved you. I didn’t think we were that serious. I told you all along I was bi and I’ve been leaning towards the feeling of a man lately. So I’m really sorry, but I don’t want to see you anymore.”

“I can’t believe this? What, you’re going to go and fuck a man for a while and then go back to women again? I’ve never understood the entire bi-sexual idea anyhow. I think you’re a very mean person. Why didn’t you tell me before I fell in love with you?” Susan ranted. 

“Susan, I just started feeling this way, I’m so sorry to hurt you. It just wouldn’t have worked out. I’m truly sorry. Maybe someday we can be friends.”

“Friends? Like I would want to remain friends with someone that stomped on my heart. Fuck you, Blair Sandburg. I hate you,” Susan said very angrily as she stormed out the door. 

“Well, actually I think that went rather well,” Naomi said. 

“Shut up, mom. I just hurt someone and I never should have let her get so focused on me. I know better. I like men better. I just didn’t have anyone in mind and thought Susan would be all right for the time being. That was mean of me and I’ve got to live with that now.”

“At least you know how to meditate, dear. Now let’s go to dinner,” Naomi said. 

“I’m going to pick something up and go home. I just want to be alone,” Blair said softly. 

“Honey, I came to visit you for your birthday,” Naomi reminded him. 

“Fine, where are we going?” Blair asked. 

“How does Claim Jumper sound? They have great salads,” Naomi answered. 

“I love Claim Jumper but not for the salads. Let’s get there early so we can get a booth,” Blair suggested. 

The drive over there was quiet. Naomi felt like Blair needed time to think by himself, so she didn’t bother him for a change. 

Blair wondered if someone had abducted his mother and done something to her. She was never this quiet, but Blair was thrilled about it. 

They parked, got out and got a booth quite easily. They ordered their dinner and talked about anything but Susan. 

“Do you have anything going on tomorrow?” Naomi asked. 

“I have five patients and a new client at 10:00. I’m hoping for something new and interesting. Maybe he’ll be the patient of my dreams,” Blair teased. 

“You dream about patients being your favorite?” 

“Sometimes. I would love to meet a full blown Sentinel some day and what better place then in a doctor’s office. It could happen,” Blair said with a big smile on his face. 

“And pigs can fly, honey.”

“Mom, we all know that cops can’t fly unless they’re helicopter pilots,” Blair joked again. 

“Good one, Blair. You are so right. Well at least you’re not telling me you have a long lost love you want to get back with and he’s a pig.”

“Mom, I don’t date animals,” Blair kidded once more. 

“You know very well what I mean. I would never allow a pig to become part of our family. So always be careful about whom you choose for a mate.”

“Mom, what are the chances of finding a cop that dates guys?” Blair laughed outright at this. 

“You’re right. Slim to none comes to mind,” Naomi answered. 

They finished their dinner and had a wonderful time. Blair found out that he really liked his mother’s company as long as she wasn’t trying to play matchmaker. 

They left after Naomi paid the bill and he dropped her off at her hotel. Then he went home to dream of someone that he would love to be with. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim was dreaming again. It was a blue jungle. There was a wolf and a black panther side by side and he wondered what that meant. He wished he could figure out his dreams from time to time. What could a blue jungle and a wolf and panther mean to him? He watched the two animals walk away into the blue jungle, side by side. 

Jim woke up and wiped at his face. He realized he was a fucking wuss from this dream. Any panther in their right mind would have destroyed the wolf. So the wolf must be some type of trickster. Jim was going to have to be careful. It was either the wolf was a trickster or Jim was a wuss. He preferred to think that the wolf was a trickster. 

Jim rolled over on his other side and went back to some much needed sleep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair woke from the dream again, wondering who this jaguar was. Would he meet him soon? He had a feeling that it was some type of spirit animal and Blair loved the idea of dreaming about a spirit animal. Too bad his dreams didn’t give him names or anything else to go on. 

Blair rolled over onto his over side and went back to sleep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair Sandburg woke the next day feeling good about almost everything. He felt a little guilty about Susan, but that was to be expected. He basically was a very lucky man. His best friend was his assistant at the office, Jessica. He loved her like she was his sister. They went to movies, musicals, art shows and any type of gallery or museum that was in town. One of his favorite things was watching the Jags play every week and Jessica didn’t really like watching, but she did for Blair. She hung out with him while he watched. She usually did homework. She was taking night classes and Blair helped her study a lot. Yes, Blair knew he was a lucky man to have Jessica in his life. He also had many other friends, but they weren’t as close to him as Jessica. He always met them at places and never ever invited them to his apartment. Not everyone would have understood why he had had such a small place. But for some reason Jessica seemed to understand he was comfortable there and never raised any questions about it. 

Blair looked at his iPod and realized he didn’t have a patient until 10:00. But he liked to be there before the patient was. Not that they would see him, because Blair’s office had a door that went right to his apartment. He never walked through the waiting room. He didn’t want to freak anyone out. Blair knew that he would have to be in his office by 9:30 at the latest, just in case this patient was very early. He hoped it was someone that he could help without need of drugs, because being a psychologist meant he couldn’t prescribe medications for any reason. He could suggest to the patient’s main doctor, the medications to be administered. He studied behavior, not psychopharmacy. Besides, most of the time, drugs weren’t needed, in Blair’s opinion. 

Blair had a quick breakfast down the street at the diner and then walked back to his apartment again. He sat down and read some more of the Sentinels of Paraguay and before long it was almost 8:30. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim woke up at 7:00, knowing he had to get ready, eat his tapioca and get to this new doctors office. It was down in an old warehouse district so it would take a while to get there. Jim decided that he would give this doctor a chance. More then five minutes at any rate. Jim needed help and he intended to get some today. He felt good about this meeting. Maybe it had something to do with the wolf in his dream. He knew he was the panther because he used to dream about the panther for a year before the wolf came along. No, the wolf was new and it was someone that Jim was going to meet, he just knew it. 

By the time he was ready to go, it was still early, but he left for the office anyhow. He arrived at 8:00 and the door was open. He walked in and saw a gorgeous waiting room. This doctor had excellent taste. He walked up to the desk and said, “You must be Jessica Woodruff?”

“And you must be Jim Ellison. Somehow I knew you would be very early, so I opened the door at eight this morning. Here are your papers to fill out. Just bring them back to me when you’re done. Sit wherever you like. Relax.”

Jim grasped the huge stack of papers, a pen and the clip board and took a seat. He glanced around the office waiting room and saw something that almost took his breath away. First he saw the wolf painting, then he saw a panther painting, then he saw a blue jungle with a wolf and panther in it. He didn’t know what to think. It was like he was supposed to be there. This scared Detective Jim Ellison quite a bit. He didn’t believe in silly things such as fate, but it seemed like it was fate that brought him here. 

Jim started filling out the paperwork and answered everything as best as he could. It took him almost an hour to do it right. When he was done, he took it up to Jessica and smiled when he handed it to her. 

“Thank you. I’m not sure what time he’ll see you since you’re so early. Let me talk to him first,” Jessica said. 

“Not a problem. I’m used to being early. I don’t mind waiting,” Jim answered. 

Jim sat back down and once again started looking at the artwork on the walls. They were all beautiful. Some were different then his dream, but some were **just** like his dream. This might turn out to be fairly interesting. He was trying to be optimistic. 

&&&&&&&&&&

 

Jessica took all of Jim’s paperwork and took it into Blair’s office. She didn’t knock, because he always let her know when he got there. She knocked on his apartment door and he opened it with a smile. 

“Good morning, Jessica. Why are you here so early?” Blair asked. 

“Jim Ellison is here already. He filled out all of his paperwork and he’s waiting in your waiting room. Did you want to start early today, or just have him wait?”

“Wait a moment. He got here at 8:00? Does he seem all right?” Blair asked. 

“He’s so handsome, Blair, he’s yummy. But he looks damaged if that makes you feel better,” Jessica answered. 

Blair smiled at Jessica’s comment. “Give me a few minutes to go through his paperwork and then I’ll call you and you can bring him in.”

“Okay, Blair. See you later,” Jessica said as she handed the big stack of papers to him. 

Blair walked into his office, closing the apartment door behind him. He sat down as his very masculine desk that Jessica picked out for him and started to give Jim Ellison’s papers a read. Blair’s heartbeat picked up a couple of notches when he read about heightened senses. Then he read about the telepathy and he was hooked. This man was going to be interesting, he just knew it. Jim Ellison might think he was a mess, but he just hadn’t learned control yet. Control and acceptance is all it would take. Thankfully, Blair was good at teaching both. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim was just thinking about leaving when he heard Jessica think, _‘He is so handsome but yet he looks like he needs a good friend. I hope he’ll let Blair be just that. With any luck, maybe he’ll become my friend too.’_

Jim decided that this wasn’t such a bad place. He liked Jessica, so maybe that was a good indication of how good Blair Sandburg would be by choosing such a good assistant. 

Jim couldn’t believe how nervous he was. He was going to have to tell this doctor how he could hear things, both aloud and inside. The voices within were the ones that were really getting to him. He had no right to be in their thoughts. He felt like an intruder every time he heard something. 

Jessica looked over at Jim and saw he was getting nervous. He was wringing his hands and looked terribly shaken up. 

She picked up the phone and punched Blair’s office. 

“Yes?” Blair answered. 

“I think it would be a good time, now,” Jessica answered. 

“You think he might leave?” Blair asked. 

“Oh yeah, pretty soon,” she replied. 

“Bring him in. I’m ready for him. Thank you, Jess.”

She hung up the phone and said, “Mr. Ellison, Dr. Sandburg will see you now. Follow me.”

Jim got up and wanted to dart out the door very quickly, but instead he followed Jessica to the big oak door that was awaiting them. Jessica knocked on it twice and opened it and said, “This is Jim Ellison, Dr. Sandburg.”

Jim walked in and said, “Thank you, Jessica.”

“You are most welcome, Mr. Ellison,” she replied. 

“Call me Jim, please?”

“All right, but I’d like you to call me Jess then,” she countered. 

“Thank you, Jess.”

She walked out of the room smiling. 

Blair came around the huge desk and smiled the entire time, he could not believe how gorgeous this man was. ‘ _You’re his doctor, get your mind out of the gutter.’_ He put his hand out for Jim to shake and Jim grasped it and shook it hard. “It’s good to finally meet you, Dr. Sandburg.” Jim wondered if Blair felt the jolt of electricity go through his arm like Jim did. Blair was not only beautiful, but there was something about his scent that had Jim on edge right away. 

“I’ll call you Jim, if you call me Blair. I insist that all of my patients call me Blair. It’s more comfortable for everyone involved. Sit down and tell me what you would like to see come from these visits.”

Jim sat down and thought a moment and then asked, “Did you read my papers?”

“Yes, of course I did, why?” Blair wondered. 

“Well, it’s a funny thing, but I’m not reading anything off of you. I can’t hear anything you’re thinking. But yet I could hear everything Jess was thinking just a moment ago. Why do you think that is?” Jim asked. 

“Honestly, I have no idea why. Maybe because you have a barrier placed in your mind for doctor-patient talks. I don’t know what else it could be.” _‘Thank God, he can’t read my mind. He would realize what a dirty one I have.’_

“I have to tell you, this is very relaxing. I’m exhausted from listening to everyone’s thoughts. You have no idea what it’s like. I feel like an intruder all the time,” Jim admitted. 

“Well, let’s relax and start talking about Jim Ellison. I want to hear all about your senses. I have something to tell you about them when you’re done,” Blair said. 

“It’s funny, but you don’t act like the rest of the doctors I have seen. They treat me like I’m insane and that wasn’t even knowing about the telepathy. Why are you accepting it so easily?” Jim asked. 

“First of all, I did studies on something called Sentinels. I believe you to be one of them. They have five heightened senses and are able to help with their jobs. It would make sense that you would be a police officer, since you would want to protect your tribe. Your tribe would be Cascade. It’s a big tribe, but you probably feel like everything is up to you to fix. These senses can’t be turned off, but they can be turned down. You mentioned that you haven’t been able to eat well, in weeks. That’s going to change as of today, I promise. You’ll be able to eat whatever you want to from now on,” Blair said. 

“You have seen or heard of this before?” Jim asked hopefully. Jim realized it didn’t matter how attracted he was to the doctor, he needed him as a doctor first. 

“I studied a member of a Peruvian tribe that had four heightened senses. I think his sense of taste was altered somehow. But he was interesting to say the least. I learned a great deal about him while I was there. So I’ve always held out hope that someday someone would walk into my office and say they were a Sentinel. I never honestly believed it could happen, but here you are. And here I am going to help you. It’s going to be easier then you think.”

“What are we going to do first?” Jim asked. 

“First of all, we need to turn down your senses. They are controlled in your mind by a sort of dial system. Think of a radio dial and just picture that in your mind. Now turn the dial down for each sense from 10 to 8 and see if you notice any difference,” Blair instructed. 

Jim closed his eyes and did exactly what Blair told him to do and it worked. Jim could tell a difference already. “It worked. Could I turn it down more?”

“Yes, I would suggest you leave it on five for right now. That way you’re still in control but will continue to have your senses in control too. Both need to work together. Close your eyes picture the dials and move them to five. Tell me how you feel after you do it,” Blair said. 

Jim once again closed his eyes, did exactly as Blair instructed and turned each dial down to five. He couldn’t believe the difference in everything. He could actually live like this. This doctor was a genius. “Blair, you’re a genius. I could live like this, easily. You’re a miracle worker.”

“Jim, there are problems to be tackled with senses. The first one is the zone factor. If you concentrate too hard on one sense, you could zone and you could be killed easily or taken advantage of. You wouldn’t want something like this to happen while you were on duty. We’re going to work on the zone factor and how to control it. I’m going to teach you how to piggyback two senses and use them at the same time, so you’re not concentrating on just one. In no time, you’ll be able to control that part of the problem. This is going to take time, Jim. Don’t think that you’re going to leave here today and be done with it.”

“I understand, totally. I’m willing to come as long as I have to, to get this under control. I’ve been told I needed a shrink for some time, but I never realized that one would actually know what I should do. And speaking of odd things, in your waiting room, there are paintings of a panther and wolf in a blue jungle. I have dreams of a blue jungle. It used to be just the panther, but now it’s the wolf by its side too. Why do you have those pictures in your waiting room?” Jim asked, really hoping there was a good reason. 

“First of all, it’s a jaguar, not a panther. They are black, but they have spots underneath the black fur. I have the same dreams. Mine used to be just the wolf, but now I see a wolf and jaguar side by side in a blue jungle. I found out that Sentinels have spirit guides while I was in Peru. But so do Guides. They are what Sentinels need by their side from time to time. I would guess that I might be a Guide. These might be our spirit guides. This is all just a guess right now. We’ll find out more about it as time goes on.”

“Blair, how am I going to control hearing what I hear in people’s heads?” Jim asked once again, somewhat hopefully. 

“We’re going to try and use the dial system with that too. But there will be a dial for that alone and you’ll have to learn to keep it down so that you don’t sense much of anything. Then if you need to, you can turn the dial up and hear things in their minds. We can try it and see how it goes. I think that as time goes on, you will begin to learn how to control it all by yourself. There will be no need for dials or me. In a few weeks time, I think we’ll have this looking much better.”

Jim smiled for the first time in a long while. “I don’t know what I would have done without you. I was right on the edge, you know?”

“Jim, don’t you ever feel like there is no where to go. I’m always here for you. All you have to do is pick up a phone and I’ll be there. Now let’s try focusing on a dial in your mind that controls the sixth sense. Turn it down low and then I’ll bring in Jessica and see if you can still hear everything she is thinking.”

Jim leaned back, closed his eyes and was quiet for about one minute. At first Blair thought maybe he had fallen asleep, but then he sat up straight and said, “All done.”

Blair pushed the button on his phone for Jess and she answered, “Dr. Sandburg, you need something?”

“Could you please bring a tablet for Jim and a cup of coffee for both of us?” Blair asked. 

“I’ll be in, in a few moments,” Jessica said as she closed the connection. 

“She’s wondering why you’re asking for a tablet for me. And then she wondered why you didn’t give me your coffee,” Jim said almost laughing. 

“Okay, so it wasn’t my finest moment. I don’t lie well. I can tell a good story, but not to someone I care about,” Blair explained. “If you can still hear her thoughts, maybe you could turn it down a few more notches.”

Jim closed his eyes and did as Blair asked him to. He opened them up and said, “I’m ready.”

Jess walked in carrying a legal tablet and two coffees on top of it. She glanced over at Blair’s coffee pot and noticed it was empty. “Dr. Sandburg, did you need me to get you a new coffee pot?”

“Jess, I got carried away and forgot to make it. Thank you for the coffee. Just give Jim the tablet, okay?” 

Jessica handed the tablet to Jim along with the fresh cup of coffee. “Thank you, Jessica, coffee sounds very good right about now,” Jim said. 

She smiled at Jim and she said, “Anything else, Dr. Sandburg?”

“Thank you for everything and we won’t need another thing for right now. Although, could you reschedule the rest of my appointments for today if possible? If someone is in crisis, of course I will still see them. But it looks like I might be in session with Jim for some time today.”

“I will call all four of them right now and see if I can reschedule them for tomorrow or the next day. If I don’t buzz you back, that means everything is clear for the day,” Jess said as she left the room. 

As soon as she shut the door, Blair said, “So tell me, did you hear anything?”

“I heard nothing. It was like it was turned off. I can’t believe you’re helping me this much in one day. At this rate I’ll be able to go back to work in three weeks easily. Don’t you agree?” Jim asked. 

“Well, we’re going to take our time, Jim. We don’t want to rush into anything. Plus you have to remember that at any time, if you’re under pressure, nervous or upset about something, your dials will start leaving the intended area and going to the top again. You’ll have to learn to keep those dials where they belong no matter what,” Blair said. 

“I think I have a lot to learn. And believe me I’m not the most patient person in the world,” Jim admitted. 

“You’re going to learn to change your habits somewhat. You will become more patient whether you like it or not. People are going to think you’re someone else,” Blair said smiling. 

“I hope so, because they don’t really like the old Jim.”

“Jim, I find that hard to believe. I like you and I’ve only known you for two hours,” Blair confessed. 

“That’s just it, once you get to know me, you won’t like me any more,” Jim joked. 

“Jim, I want to get back to business again. We can focus on the senses later, but I want to know about Jim Ellison. Who are you and what do you do in your spare time?”

“That’s a hard thing to do. I’m the son of William Ellison and the brother of Steven Ellison. Not much at either of them. I haven’t seen my father in years or my brother. I didn’t have a great life growing up and I just like to stay away from bad feelings coming back to haunt me again.”

“Jim, let me stop you there for a moment. You never mentioned your mother. Where is she?”

“She left my family when I was ten. I never saw her again. I have no idea where she is and don’t care,” Jim said coldly. 

“If we’re going to do therapy, you have to tell me the truth. You seriously don’t care where she is?” Blair asked. 

“All right, you caught me. I do care. I don’t know why. She never tried to find me. She never tried to see us or anything. I find this hard to believe of a mother, don’t you?”

“Yes, very hard to believe. But you don’t know what the circumstances were. Maybe your father made her leave. Maybe she had done something wrong to one of you boys and you don’t remember. I have no idea, but there could be a reason. It would seem to me that you could always try and find out what happened to her. If not through the police department, then hire a private investigator.”

“Do I have to agree to this today?”

“Jim, you don’t have to agree to this any day. This is your therapy. I hope to help, not hurt. So we’ll discuss this at another time. Now about your father, what would you say if I asked you to go and visit him?”

Jim looked oddly at Blair and then finally answered, “I would wonder why? He hasn’t looked me up either.”

“Jim, someone has to make the first move in any relationship. Perhaps your father and your brother are both dying to get together with you again. You won’t know until you try. You could ask both of them to meet you for dinner somewhere. You could take someone along with you that you feel comfortable with and see them that way. It might be the move that everyone was looking for and the start of new relationships. What do you think about that?”

“Would you go along?” Jim asked. 

“No, I couldn’t go along. That would be unethical. But you must know someone you trust enough to go with you. Right?”

Jim thought a moment and said, “I have a partner at work who is from Australia. Her name is Megan Connor and I like her enough. Maybe she would go with me if I told her why.”

“I knew you would think of someone. Now, promise me you’ll call today and set up a time and date with your dad and your brother. But remember one thing Jim, they are your family and you don’t have to take anyone with you if you don’t want to. You’ll be just fine.”

Jim smiled. “I promise. I’ll call Connor first and tell her why I’d like her to go with me. But I wouldn’t want her to get the wrong impression. I only date guys.”

“Did you mean to say that?” Blair asked almost snickering. 

“No, I can’t believe I just told you that. I think you’re a demon. I seem to tell you everything. Now what would you like to know about me next?”

“What is there to tell me?” Blair asked. 

“I was married for two years, because I thought I had to hide my sexuality from the police station and from the world. It didn’t take. I wasn’t a good husband for her and she wasn’t a good wife for me. So we divorced and we’ve been great friends since the day we signed the papers. We just weren’t meant to be married.”

“Does she live in town and you see her often?”

“No, her name is Carolyn and she lives in San Francisco. It seems like the wrong one moved, doesn’t it?” Jim joked. 

“Are you referring to San Francisco, because there are a lot of gay people there?” Blair asked, trying to hide the smile from his face. 

“Yes, it was a joke, but not a good one, I would guess. The man I’m dating says I don’t have a sense of humor.”

“Jim, I do have a sense of humor and thought it was funny, but why did you bring up your man friend at this time? Is something bothering you about him?”

“Yes…He wants to be openly gay and I told him no. So he’s not giving me sex until I agree. So we haven’t seen each other for two weeks. I’m right on the edge of breaking down. Know what I mean?” Jim asked. 

“Jim, do you mean to say, you’re ready to give in to coming out because you want sex?” Blair asked. 

“Well, yeah. I need it bad. I’ve been extra sex starved since this all started. I don’t know why.”

“It’s because you’re going through extra touchy feely tactile stages with the senses. It’s to be expected. You’ll be better tonight with the dials turned down. So if you don’t want to agree to something, you don’t have to. Plus there is always your hand, need I remind you?” Blair asked. 

Jim snickered. “Yeah, I’ve been trying that. It doesn’t help enough. I need to sleep with someone soon.”

Blair cleared his voice and said, “So you are going to out yourself so that you can get sex?”

“No, I think I’m going to go to a gay bar tonight and get what I need from a stranger,” Jim answered. 

Blair looked down at the chart in front of him and wrote something and didn’t say a word. 

Jim saw this reaction and said, “You disapprove?”

“Well, if you’re in a relationship, then I would go end it before I went and started something with someone else. You need to close things before you open new ones.”

“Fine, I’ll meet him tonight and tell him we’re through. He’s going to be a drama queen, I can tell,” Jim stated. 

“Jim, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. If you want to go be with a stranger tonight that’s fine by me. You just asked me if I approved or not. It’s not for me to approve, I was giving an opinion.”

“I’ll tell him tonight. He’s going to be one pissed off fireman,” Jim said. 

“You’re dating a fireman?” Blair asked almost laughing. 

“Why do you think that’s funny?”

“I don’t know, it just seems odd that two men in very macho jobs shouldn’t be gay, but they are. What’s his name, anyway?”

“His first name is Cameron, but I don’t want to say anymore about him. I shouldn’t have said as much as I did. I’m sorry,” Jim said oddly. 

Blair could tell that when he almost laughed ruined things. “Jim, let me apologize for my treatment of you and Cameron. It amused me because I think of both of these jobs to be so macho and I liked the fact that you’re both gay in those jobs. Not openly gay, but gay none-the-less.”

“Apology accepted. So you weren’t laughing at me?”

“Not hardly, Jim. Now would you like to get back to telling me what you like to do in your spare time?”

“I like to make love.” Jim shouted before he could catch himself. 

The door to Blair’s office opened and Jess said, “Is everything all right, Blair?”

“Everything is fine. I upset Jim and he’s letting me know that I did. I’ve learned my lesson. Now you go back out, Jim’s not going to hurt me, are you Jim?”

Jim looked at the floor and said, “I’m sorry, Jess. I got carried away. I would never hurt him.”

“All right then, I’ll leave the two of you to yell at each other,” She said as she shut the door. 

“She’s a little overprotective. I got beat up by a patient once and she never got over it. She’s been nervous ever since,” Blair explained. 

“Did you laugh at him too?” Jim asked angrily. 

“Jim, we have to get past this. Now I said I was sorry, you accepted my apology, but yet you haven’t. What can I do to make it up to you?”

“Tell me about yourself,” Jim said calmly. 

“I don’t tell my patients much about myself because it doesn’t help their recovery. I’m sorry, Jim. But as time goes on, you’ll get to know me and realize that I’m just as rude and obnoxious as the next person.”

“You’re not rude, that’s why it took me off guard. Now tell me why you thought it was funny,” Jim pleaded. 

“Okay, this will probably be our last session. You’ll get angry and leave and that will be that. But we’ll have it all out in the open. You said that your male friend was going to be a drama queen over all of this and yet, you’re the one that was upset. Not your male friend. He made a decision and moved on. You’re the one that’s upset.”

“Oh for Christ’s sake. I’m the fucking drama queen. No wonder you laughed. I don’t usually play the drama queen, but I’ve been without sex for too long,” Jim admitted. 

“I think if you met with him tonight, you could arrange some type of sex. Maybe you could decide you’re big enough to be out at the station. Just like he’s ready,” Blair assured him. 

“I don’t want to be out. Okay, maybe being out isn’t the worst thing in the world, but not with him. He cries at the drop of a hat. He’s not exactly my type. We’re not serious at all. For me, it’s just sex.”

“It’s serious for him, Jim. You have to consider him. So decide and then tell him the truth tonight. Don’t open any doors without closing the other one first. Promise me?” Blair asked. 

“Do you treat a lot of gay dudes?” Jim asked. 

“I don’t know that I would consider them a lot, but some, why? And why aren’t you promising me?” Blair countered. 

“Oh I forgot. I promise. I’m telling him tonight that we’re through and that I don’t love him. He’ll take it hard but it’s for the best. The reason I asked about treating gay guys is because you’re handling it so well. If I didn’t know better, I would guess you were gay,” Jim said. 

“Would it bother you if I was gay?” Blair asked. 

“Not at all, oh hell, you are gay. My gaydar is offline today. Usually I can pick it up in about five minutes. I’m totally off my game.”

“Jim, this isn’t a game. You’re here to get better, that’s why you didn’t guess. Now that you’re feeling somewhat safer with me, you’ve let your guard down and you felt it. You are my patient and it’s never a game,” Blair said. 

“So what else do you want to know about me?” Jim asked. 

“What do you do in your spare time?”

“For the last two weeks, I’ve been sex starved so I stick near my house where I can take care of business. Although, that hasn’t even been working lately.”

“Jim, I meant, what do you do for fun? Like do you see movies, games, anything like that?” Blair wondered. 

“I see a movie now and then and go to a Jags game when I can, but usually by myself. I don’t really have any friends to speak of. I mean, I know Connor would go somewhere with me, because she’s lonely, I can tell, but I like my company better then anyone else.”

“Starting tomorrow, I not only want you to see your family, but I want you to ask Connor if she would like to see a movie of her choice. Make her feel less lonely, Jim. She needs a friend as badly as you do. What do you think of that idea?”

“Could it be a Jags game instead?” Jim asked. 

“Sure, but a movie would be nice now and then for her. Do you know anyone at work that could go along that maybe Connor could be interested in?” 

“There’s Joel. He’s a really nice guy. His wife died years ago and he never dates or anything. Maybe he would like to date Connor. I don’t know. I’m not much of a matchmaker. But I guess I could ask them both to go to the game and sit at one end so they have to sit together. She likes Joel at work. Maybe she would like him after work. Who knows? I feel like breaking into song, singing ‘Matchmaker, Matchmaker, make me a match…’”

Blair laughed about the song and said, “It sounds like a good idea to me. If it doesn’t work out, it’s not a big deal, because you never said it was a date. It’s just three friends watching a game. Speaking of the Jags, do you believe Mason Tyler this year? He’s getting better and better every game, in my opinion anyhow.”

“Wow, you watch the Jags too. It’s a shame you’re my doctor. We have a lot in common,” Jim said wiggling his eyebrows. 

“You really need your doctor right now,” Blair answered very seriously. 

“I know. Sometimes real life sucks.” And Jim meant that in the most serious way. 

“We’re going to go over some tests now to see how strong your senses are. This will take a few hours. Are you ready for three hours of tests?” Blair asked. 

“Anything that will help me, I’m ready for.”

For the next three hours, Jess never heard any yelling from the office again. She had ordered lunch for them and took it in. Blair was happy to see food, but Blair had made Jim put a blindfold on and guess each thing he ate. What shocked Jim the most was that he was able to eat it all. Everything Jess had ordered was fine with his senses. Jim couldn’t believe how lucky he was in coming to Blair Sandburg that day instead of someone else. 

At five o’clock that night, Jim finally said, “I’m ready to go home now and sleep for a week. How often do I come in anyhow?”

“I’d say twice a week, for two hours of tests and call me if you have any problems.”

“Okay, then I’ll make the appointment with Jess as I leave. See you later this week, Blair.”

“It was wonderful meeting you, Jim. Have a good rest of the week. In fact, make the appointment for Friday so you’ll have some things to tell me when you come in,” Blair suggested. 

“Bye.” Jim opened up the door and left. 

Blair never felt so sorry about a patient leaving in his life. Not that he was worried about Jim. He just liked him. He felt so good about life, he was going to even break down and take his mother out for dinner. 

Blair knew that he shouldn’t have feelings for his new patient, but it was too late for that. He was a professional and would be sure to keep it in his own mind. Thankfully, Jim couldn’t read his. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim left the office feeling odd. He really liked his doctor, but he **’really liked’** his doctor. Jim was going to have to keep that under control. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair called his mother and they made plans for dinner at Claim Jumper again. She liked it there and Blair felt comfortable there too. He had time to take a quick shower before their reservation at 7:30. 

As soon as Naomi got off the phone, she called Susan and told her where they would be and when. Susan thanked Naomi and said she would see her there. Susan wasn’t one to give up without a fight. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim went home, took a shower, heated up some soup and ate it. He was still in shock that he was able to eat anything he wanted to. This doctor was a miracle worker. 

The phone rang and Jim answered it. “Ellison.”

“Jim, it’s me, Cameron. Have you given any more thought to what we talked about?”

“Yeah, Cameron, I did. Could you come over tonight and I’ll tell you what I decided.”

“I don’t need to come over, I can tell by the tone of your voice that we’re not coming out. So I’m done with you, Jim. It was nice knowing you, but I never want to see you again,” Cameron said very coldly. 

“If you insist, Cameron. It was nice knowing you. Goodbye.” Jim hung up the phone before Cameron could say anything else. 

Jim felt like a weight was lifted. Actually he didn’t really even like Cameron. That was half of the problem about coming out with him. Everyone would have known that Jim was with _‘no personality Cameron’._ He had a body to die for, but that only went so far. 

Jim picked up the phone and called Connor. “Connor.”

“Hey Connor, it’s me, Ellison. I was wondering if you’d like to have dinner with me tonight. This isn’t a date. I just thought you might like to go to dinner with a friend. It’s an Italian place called Saccony’s. What do you think?”

“I can’t believe you just said that much to me. I’m almost done with my paperwork. Could you pick me up here at the station?”

“Sure, I’ll be there in about a half hour. Does that work for you?” Jim asked. 

“I’ll be down in the parking garage. Oh here comes Joel, I better give him the paperwork,” Connor said. 

“Hey, if he’s not doing anything, why don’t you ask him if he’d like to go with us to Saccony’s,” Jim said evilly. 

“That’s a good idea. I’ll ask him and we’ll see you in a half hour. Thanks, Jim.” 

Connor put down the phone and walked over to Joel and handed him the paperwork he had been waiting on. “Here is everything you need, Joel. Jim just called and asked if you and I would like to have dinner with him at Saccony’s. He’s going to pick us up in the parking garage in a half hour. You game?”

“That sounds like a nice evening. I love Saccony’s, so that’ll be nice. Not to mention, I’m starving,” Joel answered with a smile. 

The two of them put their things away and walked down to the parking garage to wait for Jim. 

 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim pulled into the parking garage at the station and Joel and Connor were standing there talking and laughing. Jim had a feeling this might just work. Blair was the matchmaker. If it worked, Jim was going to take the credit, if it didn’t work; Blair was going to catch the blame. 

Joel opened the front door for Megan when Jim pulled up beside them in his SUV. “You sit in front, Megan.”

“Why thank you, Joel, but now I’m closer to Jimbo for hitting him when he drives too fast.”

“Excuse me, I’m in the SUV. Did you forget I was here?” Jim teased. 

“Jim, it’s really nice that you asked us both to join you for dinner. We seldom see you outside of work, so this will be a nice evening,” Joel said. 

Jim smiled at Joel in his rearview mirror and Joel smiled back. Jim recognized that smile. Joel was on a fucking date. Jim almost laughed out loud, but caught himself so he wouldn’t have to explain. 

“So what’s the deal, Jimbo, why are you off work for three weeks? We can tell you’re not sick,” Connor asked. 

“Well, actually I am sick. Mentally sick. Stop laughing, Connor, that’s not even nice to laugh at the mentally challenged person in the car. And remember that he’s driving,” Jim joked. 

“Jim, are you really having some issues?” Joel asked helpfully. 

“Yes, I’m having some issues. But I found a great doctor who thinks he’ll have me turned around in no time. Not to worry, either of you. Let’s have a nice dinner tonight and not talk shop,” Jim suggested. 

“But Jimbo, what shall we talk about?” Connor kidded. 

“For instance do either of you like to watch the Jags play?” Jim asked. 

Connor smiled. “I never miss the Jags. I get mad if I have to work and miss them. I always treat Simon all pissy when that happens.”

It was Joel’s turn to smile. I can’t believe that you’d be pissy to anyone, Megan.”

“Why thank you, Joel. But I **was** the last time I missed a game. That’s how hooked I am on the Jags. Why do you ask, Jimbo?”

I wanted to get some courtside tickets if I could and wanted to see if you two wanted to go with me or not,” Jim said. 

Megan Connor knew something was up, she just didn’t know what. “Sure, I’d go in a heartbeat.”

“I would too, Jim. I love the game and the team.”

“Good, I’ll get tickets for next week then. In case you’re wondering, my doctor told me I need to spend more time with friends. You’re the only two I have other then Simon, but he’s usually busy.”

“This doctor sounds like a very smart man,” Connor said. 

They parked at Saccony’s and Jim said, “This time it’s on me. I’d like to treat, if you don’t mind.”

Both of Jim’s friends looked surprised. “It’s fine with me, Jimbo. Just don’t make a habit of it.”

“It’s fine with me too, Jim. Next time, my treat,” Joel answered. 

They walked in and began a really fun evening. Jim found out what it was like to go out with friends and just enjoy yourself. And he did enjoy himself. He laughed, he kidded, he talked and he laughed some more. Joel and Connor were cracking him up. And then he saw the look between Connor and Joel and knew that his plan had worked. Okay, so not his plan, but Blair’s. Joel was smitten. So was Connor. Jim felt wonderful and realized Blair really did know what he was talking about, in case Jim had worried about that before. In fact, he was going to take Blair some chocolates on Friday for this. He deserved something nice. Maybe some for Jessica too. Jim realized at that moment, that he really liked both of them too and just as friends. This was a good feeling to Jim and he wanted to keep that feeling forever. 

When dinner was done, Jim took them back to the parking garage and dropped them off. They both thanked him for a marvelous time and Jim told them how much he enjoyed their company, making both of their nights complete. When Jim drove off he watched in the rearview mirror and saw Joel walk Connor to her car and give her a kiss. 

“Yes…” Jim shouted to himself. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Jim arrived home, he had a bowl of ice cream and didn’t know if he wanted to answer the phone when it rang. He looked at the caller ID and saw it was Connor. 

“Hello?” 

“Jimbo, what’s wrong?” 

“Connor, you’re calling me, what do you mean what’s wrong?” 

“Well, you usually answer it saying, **‘what?’** so it threw me off guard. I just wanted to thank you for the wonderful evening and tell you that Joel asked me out for tomorrow night. Do you believe it? I’ve been here for how long and no one has asked me to anything and tonight I get asked out twice. This was my night. Thank you, again,” Connor said happily. 

“You’re welcome, Connor. I wouldn’t have if it hadn’t have been for my doctor. He’s great. I’m telling you, I’m going to be like a new person when I come back,” Jim assured her. 

“Well, just don’t change all the way, because I like the Jim Ellison I already know, too.”

“Thank you, Connor. That was really nice of you to say, now if you would just stop calling me Jimbo, I would be happy,” Jim admitted. 

“Oh no, I’m never going to stop calling you Jimbo. That’s says **you** to me. So it can’t ever change.”

Jim groaned and smiled to himself. 

“See you next week, hopefully. Let us know if you get tickets for the game. In fact, let me treat this time. Can I call for the tickets?” Connor asked. 

“Sure, go ahead. I’m not sure what day they’re playing, but it doesn’t matter to me. I don’t have to worry about work,” Jim joked. 

“See you soon, Jimbo.”

Jim hung up the phone and smiled. Yes, Blair Sandburg was a very smart man. He knew just what Jim had needed. 

Jim decided that while he was in such a good mood, he was going to call his dad. Nothing could ruin the happiness he was feeling. 

Jim dialed the number from memory and was shocked that he still remembered. He heard a deep voice say, “Ellison.”

“Funny, that’s exactly how I answer, dad,” Jim said hoping to open the conversation. 

“Jimmy? Is this you?”

“Yes, dad, it’s me. I was wondering if you would like to have dinner this week. I was thinking Claim Jumper would be a good place. What do you think?”

“Jimmy, why are you calling me? I haven’t spoken to you in years. Why now? Is something wrong?” William sounded angry to Jim. 

Jim kept his calm and said, “No, nothing is wrong. I’m seeing a therapist and he suggested I start seeing my family once again. So I’m hoping you’ll agree to see me. I want to see Steven too.”

“Steven comes over every Sunday for dinner. Would you like to come over and join us this Sunday?”

“That would be really nice, dad. Thank you. What time on Sunday?”

“He usually watches a game with me at 2:00 and then we have dinner at about 5:00. Does that still work for you and your job?” William asked somewhat nicer this time. 

“I’m off for three weeks, dad. So I have nothing but time. Even when I’m not on leave, I have Sunday’s off unless a big case comes up. I’ll be glad to come over on Sunday at 2:00. I’ll see you and Steven then. Thank you for asking me,” Jim said before they got off the phone. 

Jim smiled when he made the note on his calendar to see his dad and Steven on Sunday. He couldn’t believe how easily that had gone. Now he just had to wait until Sunday to find out how it would come out. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair picked Naomi up late and apologized for it. Naomi just smiled and said it was fine. They talked about their day and Blair told her that he had met one of the most interesting patients he had ever had before. Naomi frowned at him and said, “Blair honey, you do know you can’t sleep with patients, right?”

“Mom, he’s my patient. I don’t sleep with any of them. Mind your own business,” Blair said angrily. 

“You usually don’t bring up patients, so I just wondered about him,” Naomi answered. 

“Let’s just have a nice dinner. No talk about work, patients or anything like that. Let’s just have a good time.”

“That sounds good to me, sweetie.”

They arrived and they seated them about 20 minutes later. They were sitting there getting ready to order appetizers when Susan walked up to the table. 

“I can’t believe you’re here tonight too. We were going to come tonight and I just decided to still show up. Would you mind if I joined your mother and you?” Susan asked sweetly. 

Blair frowned and then glared at his mom. He knew she had something to do with it. She gave him a look, like, ‘what?’ and said, “It’s good to see you, Susan. Of course you can sit with us. We have nothing planned do we sweetie?”

“Susan, I’m not getting back with you, so you may as well give up now. I would like to eat dinner with my mother in peace,” Blair said quite rudely actually. 

“Well, I guess I know how you really feel,” Susan shouted. 

Blair kept his voice down and said, “I told you how I felt earlier, I didn’t know there was a question about it.”

“Honey, it wouldn’t hurt to let her eat dinner with us. I mean what would that hurt?” Naomi said. 

Blair got out of the booth and said, “By all means, join Naomi. She’s eating dinner alone tonight. This will be nice for her.” Blair turned and walked out of Claim Jumper and was starving, so that pissed him off even more. He got into his car and drove to Wonderburger and got everything that was bad for him. He didn’t care. He needed some comfort food. He was doing what he told his patients to never do. Well, you know the old saying; do as I say, not as I do. That was exactly how he felt that night. 

Once he got to his apartment, he locked up and sat down and started shoving his food in his mouth. He sure hoped Jim Ellison was having a better night then his doctor was. 

He had finished all of his food and was drinking the shake when his mother came to the door. He looked out and sighed very loudly, just loud enough for her to hear it outside. 

“Don’t think I didn’t hear that. Now open the door. I want to speak to you,” Naomi ordered. 

Blair went back over to his chair and sat down and turned the tv up louder. Naomi continued to knock for about five minutes, and then she gave up. Blair didn’t need to spend any time with his mother at that moment and she couldn’t make him either. He was an adult and could make his own decisions. He was tired of her pulling his strings all the time. 

He got up and got his sheets and blanket and made his bed for the night. He cleaned up the mess from dinner and then got ready for bed. When he walked by the front door, there was a note under it. He picked up and read it. 

_Darling,_

_I know you weren’t yourself tonight, so I forgive you. But you owe an apology to Susan and I want it done before tomorrow morning. You were very rude and I never taught you to be that way, ever. I won’t bother you again this trip. I’m leaving tomorrow and won’t be back for some time. But I will check in with Susan and I hope to hear that you at least apologized for what you said and did to her tonight. I think you need a therapist, Blair. It might be time for you to look into that. You are **not** meditating enough, either. Call me next week. I’ll be at Rodney’s house in Colorado. But don’t call if you have no intention of listening to your mother._

_Love, Naomi_

Blair threw the paper in his trash and lay down on his bed. He truly loved his mother, but there were times when she tried his patience. This was one of those times. She talked about Blair listening to his mother in the note, and then signed it, love, Naomi. Blair wasn’t even going to try and figure out his mother tonight. He was too damn tired for that. 

Blair’s phone started ringing as soon as he started to fall asleep. He knew it would be Susan, so he ignored it. If it was his service, it would have come through on his cell phone. His answering machine went off and Susan started screaming into the machine. 

**“I don’t believe how rude you are, Blair Sandburg and I don’t intend to let this end this way. Every one of your patients will now know that you’re a fucking fag. I hope you’re happy now. I’m going to make your life miserable. You will wish you had never been born when I’m done with you and your patients. Goodbye.”**

Blair just knew that he was going to have to get a restraining order against her and maybe even have to file harassment charges. Blair didn’t look forward to this, but it was something he would have to take care of tomorrow. Luckily it was a slow day tomorrow and not many patients for her to upset. He was going to have to come out to all of his patients and ask if they were being harassed. 

Blair took deep cleansing breaths and tried to relax. The last thing Blair thought about that night was, _‘I found my Sentinel’._

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair took the tape from the machine and took it to the police station, filed harassment charges and filed for a restraining order at the same time. The cops didn’t really look at him oddly or anything. Actually, they didn’t pay him any attention at all. He wished he could have said something about knowing a cop to make them work a little faster. When they finished all of the paperwork, they took copies and gave Blair his. Now he was set if she bothered any of his patients, all Blair had to do was call them to pick her up. 

When Blair finally got to his office, he had two patients waiting in the waiting room. He never came through the waiting room so Jess knew something was up. 

He walked up to both of his patients and said, “Did anyone bother you on your way up here?”

The man, who had been Blair’s patient for almost two years said, “There is some crazy broad downstairs telling us that you’re a fag and a fag lover. I ignored her and came right up. But two people left that were talking about making an appointment.”

“Thank you for telling me. I’ve got a restraining order on her, so hopefully the police will do something about it,” Blair said to them. “Give me five minutes and I’ll see you then Mr. Miller.”

“It’s Bob, Blair. You must really be upset,” the man observed. 

“Actually, could we cancel both of you for today? I need to get something taken care of and I need to do it fast. It would be easier if I didn’t have patients coming in and out of the building today.” Blair hoped they would understand. He hated cancelling patients, but there seemed to be nothing else to do about it. 

Both of them went over to Jessica and got the new times for the next day for their appointments. Blair thanked them and walked downstairs with them, carrying his order with him. 

“Well, if it isn’t the fag and his patients. I guess they didn’t want to stay once they found out about you,” Susan ranted. 

Blair shoved a copy of the restraining order under her face and said, “The next time it will be a policeman that takes you away. There will be no more warnings. This is on your record now, Susan. Think how that will look at the DA’s office. You might just be a secretary, but they don’t want anyone with a record.”

“This piece of paper won’t stop me for a moment, you asshole. Don’t think you can threaten me about my job. You won’t have any patients left when I get done with this,” Susan screamed at the top of her lungs. 

Blair went up the elevator and sighed when he got off. He didn’t know what to do. He walked into the office and said, “Cancel everyone. She’s insane.”

“Blair, call Jim and ask him what to do before I call and cancel anyone. Tell him what you’ve done so far and then ask him where to go from there. He’s a cop, he told me he was on leave of absence, and he’s probably bored right now. Give him something to do,” Jessica suggested. 

“Okay, I’m going to because I’m that desperate. Thank you for the idea, Jess.”

Blair walked into his office and called Jim’s home number, hoping he didn’t wake him up. 

“Ellison,” Jim answered happily. 

“Jim? This is Blair Sandburg. I hope I’m not bothering you, but I have some questions about law enforcement,” Blair said carefully. 

“What’s going on, Blair?”

Blair told him about Susan, her phone call and him going to the police station that morning and getting everything taken care of. Then he told Jim about how she was down in the lobby of the building telling all of his patients and would be patients that he was a fag and a fag lover. When he was done, Jim said, “I’ll be there in about an hour. Don’t cancel your appointments and I mean it. Don’t let her win. I’ll be down there with one of my friends and he’ll arrest her. You just take it easy and don’t cancel appointments. I probably won’t see you unless it’s necessary. Good luck.” 

Blair couldn’t believe how Jim had just taken charge and Blair felt better already. He opened his door and said, “Jim said not to cancel any appointments today, he’s going to be waiting downstairs for her when she shows up and they’ll arrest her. Thank you again for the idea. Jim knew exactly what to do.”

Jess did as instructed and didn’t cancel any appointments. Jim and Rafe walked into the lobby and saw Susan harassing three patients. Rafe arrested her after he showed her the restraining order and the charges. All three of the patients continued upstairs at Jim’s insistence that everything was under control. 

Jim thanked Rafe and Rafe just smiled and said, “You might owe me for this, Ellison.”

“Whatever you need,” Jim answered. 

“A gift certificate to Claim Jumper so I could afford to take Simon on a real date would be very nice. How does that sound?” Rafe asked after he had Susan in the back seat of his car. Jim didn’t know that Rafe was teasing. 

“That sounds perfect. I’ll get it and have it delivered to the station house. I thought you were after Connor?” Jim said somewhat surprised about the entire Simon ordeal. 

“I just say that so no one knows. But I know that you don’t care or you wouldn’t have gone to bat for your doctor. I was only kidding about the gift certificate,” Rafe said. 

“I seriously want to do it for you. You came over so quickly and she’s a handful, so I really appreciate it. It’s the least I could do. Plus Simon deserves a nice dinner out with you.”

“But not at your expense,” Rafe said very seriously. 

“It’s one friend doing something for another friend. Now let’s drop it, okay?” Jim asked. 

“Thanks, Jim. You’re the best.” Rafe got into the car and drove off down the road. 

Jim walked upstairs and saw Jess smile when he walked in. He walked up to the desk and said, “Could I leave a message for him?”

“He’s not with anyone right now, come on,” Jess said as Jim followed her. 

She opened the door and Jim smiled at Blair. “Hey, I just wanted you to know that she got arrested. She was after three of your patients in the lobby. My friend Rafe took her downtown to charge her. It’s important that she actually be charged for it, or no cop will ever help with her again.”

“Thank you so much, Jim. I didn’t know what to do about it. This is all new to me, as you well guessed. I will be sure that she is charged and has to see someone. I’m hoping they won’t give her actual jail time, but instead time to spend with a therapist.”

“Whatever **they** decide on, Blair, make sure and be in agreement,” Jim suggested. 

“Thanks again, Jim. I need to see my first patient for today now. See you on Friday,” Blair said smiling and holding the door open. Jim walked out and said goodbye to Jess and then left. 

Blair ended up having an excellent day at the office. There were nine patients that showed up and Blair felt like he was getting somewhere with all of them. 

One of the patients was bi-polar and also had Chronic Kidney Disease. She couldn’t take medication because of the damage they could cause to the kidneys and just needed to see the doctor to help her through some rough patches. And there were many of those patches. Usually Blair didn’t believe in drugs for most things, but bipolar disorder was something to worry about. There was always a big chance of suicide and he worried about his patient thinking these thoughts all the time. He always saw her and found room for her no matter when she called. She was one of his favorites. Her name was Shannon and she was a great person, just had some mental issues and some medical issues to go along with it. She was in stage four of the CKD and Blair helped her through her depression over that. She came in at least three times a week. She was learning to meditate and loved doing it. Blair felt like he was getting farther with her then she had ever been with any of her doctors that gave meds out. He would continue her therapy until he was no longer needed. That day would be a sad day indeed. Blair was very fond of her. He often said little prayers at night for a lot of his patients. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim had no sooner come home and the phone rang and it was Simon. “Hi Simon.”

“How did you know it was me?”

“I have this odd thing on my phone that tells me who is calling, ever hear of caller ID?” Jim teased. 

“I keep forgetting that you actually do have things from this century,” Simon joked back. 

“So what’s going on? Miss me already?”

“I wondered how you liked the doctor. He’s been approved for the entire department to use and I wanted to see if he was any good first before I send anyone else to him,” Simon explained. 

“He’s great, Simon. He’s already found out some of my problems and we’re working on them. He’s fairly certain I’ll be back in three weeks like a new person,” Jim said. 

“That’s good to hear. I have four officers that need to see a new doctor, so I guess I’ll send them to him,” Simon remarked. 

“That’s great, Simon. I’m sure he’ll love the new business. Anyone would be happy with him, he’s that good.”

“Well now that I have you on the phone, I could tell you that someone asked me out from the squad and I wondered what you thought of it.”

“Well who is it? Do I have to guess?” Jim asked happily. 

“I still can’t believe it, but it was Rafe. He asked me to go to Claim Jumper with him. I’m still in shock. I didn’t even know what to say to him,” Simon stated. 

“Oh so you don’t date guys anymore?” Jim said like he understood. 

“No, I date men. I just don’t usually date anyone that works for me. It doesn’t work.”

“So what’s the problem, you could at least see if it’s a good fit,” Jim suggested. 

“Why aren’t you more surprised? Did you already know?” Simon asked. 

“Yes, I overheard him talking to someone on the phone one day and he mentioned it. I told you I can hear things. I think you should try it out and see if it works,” Jim said. 

“Jim, this doctor believes you about hearing things that you shouldn’t hear?”

“Yeah, Simon, he does. It even has a name. I’m a Sentinel. They are watchers of the tribe. My tribe is Cascade. He said he’s not surprised that I chose being a cop for a living. Anyhow, he’s working on the senses with me and I’ll have it all under control when I come back. It’ll come in handy when questioning a witness or suspect.”

“So are you going to tell everyone about this?” Simon wondered. 

“No…If the truth got out, God only knows what would happen to me. But I would no longer be able to be a cop. So this is just between you and me. I will need a Guide as time goes along and I’ll train Connor to be the Guide, for the time being. She likes working with me anyhow.”

“I’m glad to hear things are going well with the doctor and that you’ll be back to work soon. Things have been crazy around here lately,” Simon stated. 

“So tell me, what are you going to do about the date?”

“I guess I’ll put Rafe out of his misery and tell him we’ll go to Claim Jumper tonight. I’m hungry for a good steak, not to mention that a little company would be nice for a change,” Simon confessed. 

“Talk to you later, Simon. Have a good time tonight,” Jim said before he hung up his phone. 

Then Jim remembered he had forgotten all about the gift certificate, so he put 100 bucks in an envelope and drove down to the station. Once he was there he went upstairs to pretend he was there to say hello to everyone and he slipped the money into Rafe’s pocket. When no one else was standing there, he told Rafe, “I hope 100 is enough.”

“Holy shit, Jim, I didn’t expect anything. I was teasing anyhow.”

“Rafe, have a good time tonight. Show him a good time. He needs it. Talk to you later,” Jim said as he got back on the elevator and rode down to his SUV. 

Jim had no idea what he was going to do for three weeks while he was off. He was bored already and it was only the second day. He was going to have to ask Blair for some suggestions of what to do while off work. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Jim got home, he got out his nice camera and decided to take a walk and get some nice shots and frame them for Blair’s office. He took pictures of buildings, old and new, flowers, both alive and dead, birds, animals, people and more people. When he was done he had like 200 pictures and couldn’t wait to see if any of them turned out well enough to frame and mat. 

He went into the office under the stairs and began to pick out only the best he could find. He used a font to sign his name on each of them above where the mat would be put on them. The JJE on each picture made him feel proud of what he was doing. Jim picked out eight beautiful pictures and took them down to Michaels and had them framed and matted. He was going to pick them up the next day. He paid extra to have them done quickly. 

Jim looked at the calendar and saw it was only Tuesday. God, this week was going by too slow. He wanted Friday to be there already. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim wondered if he could talk his dad and his brother into meeting for dinner another night. Jim was that bored, plus he really did want to see them. Then he would have something new to tell Blair. 

Jim picked up the phone and dialed William’s number and heard, “Ellison.”

“Hi dad, it’s Jim. I wondered if you and Steven would like to meet for dinner tonight or tomorrow night.”

“You’re that bored are ya?” William teased, making Jim feel better about calling. 

“Yes, I’m that bored so how about dinner?” Jim asked again. 

“I don’t know if Steven can get away, but I can. I would love to go for dinner tonight. How about Saccony’s? I really like that place,” William suggested. 

“I’ll pick you up, dad. That way you can have some wine if you’d like to,” Jim said thoughtfully. 

“That would be very nice, Jimmy. I’ll call Steven and ask if he’d join us there. What time?” 

“How about 6:30, dad?” 

“I’ll be ready. If Steven can’t come, it’ll just be you and me,” William reminded Jim. 

“That’ll be fine too, dad. Thanks,” Jim hung up the phone and felt great. Things were working out well. He had no complaints about anything. 

&&&&&&&&&&&&&

At 6:00, Jim left to go and pick up his dad. Dinner at Saccony’s sounded really good. Now that he could eat, it would be nice to have dinner anywhere. He was enjoying food again so much. And he owed it all to Blair Sandburg. But he really needed to start running again. When he wasn’t eating, he didn’t have to worry so much, but now that he could, he needed to keep fit and trim. 

Jim decided that he was going to move the dial a little on his telepathy so he might have an idea of how his dad and his brother really felt about him. He knew this wasn’t really fair, but no one said life was fair. 

He pulled up in front of his dad’s house and walked up to the door. His dad opened the door and Jim was shocked. He hadn’t seen him in years and he looked so much older, thinner and frail then he ever imagined. Jim hugged him quickly and William hugged him back. Steven walked up behind his dad and said, “Jimmy, it’s great to see you.”

Jim couldn’t believe how much he had missed his brother. He hugged him close and Steven hugged him just as hard. Steven thought, _‘so far so good.’_

Jim concentrated on turning down the dial and did that. He had no right to listen to their thoughts. It was unfair. 

“Are you guys ready to go?” Jim asked. 

“We’re starving,” Steven answered as they walked out the door and went to Jim’s SUV. 

They had nothing but small talk on the way to the restaurant. Once there, William asked, “So Jimmy, what ever made you call us?”

“My therapist talked me into it. He decided that I had let enough time pass without seeing you two and I should try and mend fences,” Jim answered. 

Steven smiled. “Well, I for one am glad. I’ve missed you big brother. I don’t even know exactly why we fell out of touch, but it’s good to see you again. Thank you for asking us out.”

“It’s no problem. I was being stubborn for years. It was time for me to move on and let you both into my life,” Jim explained. 

William said, “I hear you divorced Carolyn. That’s too bad. I’m sorry that didn’t work out.”

“Don’t be sorry, dad. It was a terrible union from the start. We both married for the wrong reasons and were sorry right away. How we lasted two years is beyond me,” Jim said. 

“Who are you seeing now?” Steven asked. 

“I’m not seeing anyone right now. I’m busy getting my life in order instead. Who are you seeing, Steven?”

“She’s really nice, her name is Pam. She’s great. Dad loves her too. She’s always trying to get me to call you, so when I told her you called us, she cried. She was that moved by your attempt to get us back to being a family again. You’ll like her, she’s very friendly.”

“I’m sure I will like her a lot. How about you, dad? Are you dating anyone?”

Both Steven and William burst out laughing. “Son, I’m too old to find someone now. I’m very set in my ways too, so it would never work.”

“Dad, you’re never too old if you find the right person. You shouldn’t have to be alone forever if you don’t want to.”

“I don’t even know where I would start,” William said. 

“I know where you can start, dad. E-Harmony. Wouldn’t he love it there, Jimmy?” Steven teased. 

“What is E-Harmony?” William wondered. 

“Nothing you want to get interested in. You might meet someone at the club some day, or at lunch some day and take a chance and ask them out. That’s the way to go,” Jim advised. Jim hoped that E-Harmony wouldn’t be brought up again. 

They all talked about different things that they had done lately and William told Jim he had been keeping track of him for years. Jim was saddened that neither of them ever made that first contact. 

“So Steven, why don’t you bring Pam to dad's on Sunday? That way I could meet her and get to know her,” Jim suggested. 

“Dad, do you mind?” Steven asked. 

“No, I adore Pam, she’s very nice. You’re going to like her just fine, Jimmy.”

“I’m sure I will, dad. Well, I guess we had better get out of here. Looks like we’re the last ones left,” Jim said smiling. 

“Thank you again, Jimmy, for dinner and getting in touch with us. It was wonderful seeing you,” William said as he hugged his oldest son close. 

Jim was moved beyond words and just stayed in his dad's arms for a long while. When he finally moved away, he had tears in his eyes. “It was fantastic seeing the two of you, also. I can’t wait for Sunday. It’ll be something nice to look forward to. What can I bring?” Jim asked as they walked out to the SUV. 

“Yourself. Sally makes all of the food up before she leaves on Sunday. So don’t worry about a thing,” William said. 

The three men talked about this and that all the way to William’s house and Jim dropped them off and said he was tired and needed to go home. In reality, he needed to think and he did his best thinking when he was alone. 

All the way home, Jim felt like crying. He didn’t know why and he didn’t cry, so he didn’t understand why he would have this feeling. When he parked at the loft, he got out and walked up the stairs sadly. He got into his home and took off his shoes and jacket and walked right over to the phone. He dialed Blair’s number and left a sad message. “Blair, this is Jim Ellison. It’s not an emergency, so you don’t have to call me back, but I was down and just wanted you to explain something to me. It can wait until Friday.” Then Jim hung up the phone and sat down. 

About ten minutes later, the phone rang and Jim answered, “Ellison.”

“Jim, this is Blair. What’s wrong? You seemed fine this morning. What happened?”

“I took my brother and my dad out for dinner tonight. We had a really good time but I’m sad. I don’t know why I’m sad, but I even felt like crying when I got home. I just wondered why I’m sad.”

“Jim perhaps it’s because you’ve lost so many years with them and there was no excuse for it. You all could have made that first move and no one did. You probably missed them and that made you sad. Did they look the same or a lot different?” Blair asked. 

Jim didn’t answer right away. He was trying to stay in control. “My dad is old now. I was shocked. He looked so frail. I felt horrible for doing that to him.”

“Jim, you didn’t do anything to him. He chose to not call you, too. You all are to blame, not just one of you. Was your brother happy to see you?” 

“Yeah, Blair he was. But something was different between us. I didn’t have that pull that I had when we were young. I miss that. Will that ever come back?”

“It might, Jim. You have to give all of you time to heal and grow. You’ll find out you have different things in common now that you’re adults. You’re still thinking of you and Steven as young boys. Now you’re men. Things are going to be different. It’ll be all right, Jim, I promise.”

“I believe you, because you have not steered me wrong yet. Thank you for everything. Now I’m going to go to bed and see if I can sleep,” Jim said. 

“Call me if you need me, anytime, day or night. I’m here for you, Jim. Remember that, okay?”

“Okay, see you on Friday,” Jim answered. He hung up the phone and got ready for bed. He felt like he could sleep for a week. Once he hit the bed, he was sleeping within moments. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair tossed and turned that night wondering about how Jim was doing. But he hadn’t called back, so that was a good sign. Blair knew Jim was going to have little set backs from time to time, but he would be able to handle them himself as the weeks went on. 

Blair had signed the paperwork at the police station that afternoon and Susan was given bail, but had to see a therapist, while awaiting her hearing, which is what Blair wanted to start with. He hoped that would be the last he would see of her. 

What Blair was going to do about his mother was another story. He felt like he should call her, but he also knew they would just argue and fight again. Blair wasn’t up for it right now. So instead of calling his mom, he went to sleep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Rafe had taken Simon to Claim Jumper as planned, but he hadn’t planned on going back to Simon’s house. Simon invited him for a drink. 

When they arrived, Simon said, “Take your shoes off at the door. I hate scratches on my wood floors.”

“You wouldn’t have had to tell me. I have wood floors too,” Rafe said quietly. 

They both took their shoes off and padded into the living room. “Sit down, Brian. I’ll get you a beer. Or would you prefer a glass of wine?”

“I would love a glass of wine. Thank you. No one ever offers wine, it’s always beer,” Rafe said casually. 

“But Brian, you always drink beer.”

“Only because no one else drinks wine. I feel left out when I drink it by myself. Need any help in the kitchen?”

“Gosh, I think I can handle two drinks by myself, Brian. I’ll be right back.” Simon walked into the kitchen and Rafe adjusted himself in his pants. He had been getting hard ever since they ate dinner. Simon even chewed his food sexy. Rafe was smitten and it was as simple as that. 

Simon walked out with two glasses of wine and the bottle, setting it down on the coffee table. “I thought it sounded good too. I love wine after I eat steak. There is something about beef and wine, it just goes together well, don’t you think?”

Rafe just stared at Simon and finally said, “Oh yeah, I totally agree.”

“Brian, are you nervous?”

“No…”

“Are you uncomfortable here?” Simon asked. 

“No…”

“Then what is going on? You’re acting very strangely and before long I’ll take it personal,” Simon stated. 

“I’m wound up,” Rafe admitted. 

“Wound up? And that means, you’re nervous?” Simon asked smiling. He knew very well what Rafe meant. 

“It means I need to get home. It was really nice having dinner with you tonight, but I need to leave before I embarrass myself,” Brian admitted. 

Simon sat over next to Rafe and began to kiss him. Thankfully neither of them were holding the wine when they got into the kissing big time. Before long, Simon said, “How would you like to spend the night?”

“Man, I don’t want to be a slut,” Rafe answered, chewing on his lip as he tried to make up his mind. 

“Then don’t stay. But I’m going in the bedroom and going to take care of business,” Simon teased. 

Rafe ran his hand across Simon’s groin and Simon moaned deep with need. “Don’t do that another time, or I’ll be done before we start. I’m a little on edge tonight myself. It’s been quite some time for me.”

Rafe undid Simon’s slacks and slid his hand inside and felt the warm, firm member waiting for him. _‘Christ, he’s huge.’_

Simon reached over and slid his hand into Rafe’s pants and the two of them were having the time of their lives. “Brian, would you like to take this into the bedroom and do something a little more constructive?”

“Yeah, I would. That would be great.” 

They both pulled their hands out of the others' pants and walked hand in hand to the bedroom. Rafe said, “You’re not going to dump me after tonight are you?”

“It depends on what a good boy you are, Brian.” Simon shoved Brian into the bedroom and he landed on the bed. Simon had Brian naked in a matter of moments and then he stripped himself. 

Brian lay on the bed licking his lips. Simon was **huge**. He had never been with a man with that big of a dick. This might be a real experience. 

Simon was smooth and firm where he needed to be and felt good when he lay next to Rafe. They began to make out and Brian said, “Fuck me.”

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” Simon said. “Wait a minute. Are we going to be exclusive, because I really like that body of yours and I don’t want to share it with anyone?” 

“I’ll belong to you as long as you want me,” Rafe said happily. 

Simon got the astroglide out and the condom and began to prepare Rafe for the fucking of his life. “I’m going to make you feel me in your throat.”

“Simon, that isn’t much of a stretch. You’re big enough where I might feel you in my throat.”

Simon threw back his head and laughed out loud. “Boy, do you know how to make a person feel good.”

“I’m only yours, Simon. Make me yours.”

Simon slid into Rafe, slowly, because Simon did know how large his penis was. And men had complained that he went too fast. Simon was taking his time with Brian. He wanted to do it right. Before long he was all the way in and Brian said, “Oh god, I **am** going to feel you in my throat.”

Simon bit him on his shoulder and Rafe came just like that. He had been right on the edge all night and when Simon bit him, it was just too much. Simon thrust inside of Rafe four times and shot his come as hard as he could. Rafe was going to think about it later and wonder if he had tasted it. 

Once Simon started to slide out of him, he cleaned them both off and said, “Would you like to spend the night?”

“I would love to spend the night. Thank you. That was so nice. I haven’t been with anyone in a long while, so I was really horny. Next time, I’ll last longer.” Rafe kissed Simon quickly before he curled into Simon’s body and started to relax for the evening. 

Simon walked out and got the wine and brought it in to the bedroom. “Something to help us sleep.”

“Oh boy, sex and wine. I’ll be sleeping until Saturday,” Brian teased. 

They talked pillow talk and kissed now and then and finally put their glasses aside for the night. 

“Wake me up in the morning, and we’ll have some more fun before we go to the office,” Simon suggested. 

“Sounds good to me,” Rafe answered. 

“Before I forget, how would you feel about transferring to Joel’s department, so we wouldn’t work in the same department?” Simon asked. 

“I think that it’s something to think about, but not tonight. I’ll talk to Joel when the time is right,” Rafe said and started to fall asleep. 

Simon kissed him once more and wondered if he had made a big mistake. He thought Rafe would jump at the chance. He would have to talk to Jim about it and get a second opinion. 

He yawned and held Rafe tighter and before long he joined him in a deep sleep. 

 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim was having a good time sleeping in the next morning and the phone rang at 8:00 and he got angry. “What?” 

“Hi Jimbo, I was calling to tell you that I got tickets for the game three weeks from now. They are out of town, playing away games, until then. Starts at 5:00, so do you want to drive? Or are you going to let one of us do the driving?” Connor asked. 

“No, I’ll drive. Nothing against anyone else driving but I like to feel like I’m in control and when I’m driving it’s one of the few times I feel like that. So if no one minds, I’ll do the driving,” Jim explained. 

“Okay, will you pick us up at 3:30 at the station? I want to get there early so we won’t be in line too long for the game,” Connor said. 

Jim walked downstairs so he could write it down, as to not forget it. “I’m writing it on my calendar as we speak. Just make sure I don’t forget about it since it’s so far away. So where are you going with Joel?”

“We’re going to Claim Jumper. I love that place. I’ve only been once, but it was excellent. I can’t wait to go again. Wish me luck,” Connor teased. 

“Luck…”

“Talk to you soon, bye Jimbo.”

“Bye, Connor.” Jim grinned as he walked away from the calendar. Jim wished he had someone in his life at that moment, so that he could call and tell him the news. But alas, that would have to wait. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim went to Michaels and picked up the framed pictures for Blair. He figured he could use them in his office or his home. Jim didn’t care. He just wanted to thank Blair in some small way. When Jim paid for the framing, he about died. Framing things was expensive. But Blair was worth it. Jim smiled when he thought of the man. He was a good doctor and a good friend to Jim. Then he picked up the baskets and the chocolate for both baskets. 

Jim stopped by the station house next and asked Simon if he wanted to go for lunch. 

“Give me five minutes and I’ll be all yours,” Simon answered. 

Jim waited out in the bullpen and talked to everyone that came into the room. Rafe walked up all smiles and said, “Hey, what are you doing here?”

“I’m taking Simon out for lunch. Would you like to go too?” Jim asked. 

Rafe lowered his voice and said, “Simon wants us to keep things hush, hush around here, so I better not.”

“Okay, don’t say I didn’t ask you,” Jim joked. 

“I really wish I could. It’s been a hell of a day so far,” Rafe answered. 

“Do you miss me yet?” Jim asked. 

“Boy, do we ever. Being down one man makes a big difference. When are you coming back again?”

“Supposed to be in three weeks, but not sure yet. I’ll try and speed things up a little. Here comes Simon. I’ll talk to you later,” Jim said as he walked to the elevator with Simon. 

“Where are we going?” Simon asked as they got into the elevator. 

“Brad’s Bar and Grill. They have the best sandwiches in town. Have you ever eaten there?” Jim wondered. 

“I love Brad’s. It’s one of my favorite places to go. It’s never too busy either, so you don’t have to worry about running into too many people at one time,” Simon stated. 

Once inside Jim’s SUV, Jim said, “Are you going to tell me about the date last night, or am I going to have to guess?”

“I shouldn’t be dating him. It’s as simple as that. I’m his Captain. I’d like him to transfer over to Joel’s department so that it would make life easier, but he said he had to think about it first. I don’t think he’s as serious as I am.”

“Simon, this was your first date. You can’t expect him to change his whole life after one date. Can you?” 

“I’m in love, Jim.”

“Already?” Jim asked.

“Yes, already. We slept together. I never should have done that. He said we could be exclusive, but then he said he had to think about the job with Joel,” Simon commented softly. 

“You might have rushed things a little, but who am I to say anything. It’s been a long time for me, if someone offered, I would take them up on it,” Jim joked. 

“Do you think that he’ll talk to Joel?”

“I think he will as time goes on, Simon. Give him time. Let him try this new feeling out,” Jim suggested. 

“Jim, you’re right. I’ve got to back off a little and give him some breathing room. When do you think you’ll be back? Boy, do we miss you.”

“It makes me feel terrific that you all miss me. I really didn’t even think anyone liked me,” Jim admitted. 

“Are you talking about me, Jim?”

“I was talking about any of you. I’ve not been the easiest to work with for a long, long while,” Jim said. 

“But you’re changing that now, so that’s what’s important. You’re a good man, Jim and we all appreciate your effort in getting better,” Simon confessed. 

“Thank you, Simon. Let’s order us some sandwiches,” Jim said as they got out of the SUV and walked inside. 

They talked, laughed and had a really good lunch. Simon hadn’t seen Jim so relaxed in years. He wondered what this Blair Sandburg had done to change him. 

They quietly talked about the senses. Simon was wondering how that would work in the station. Jim tried to answer all of his questions as well as he could. He told Simon that the best part would be the telepathy. That way he could read a person’s mind more or less and find out if they were telling the truth. Simon was somewhat excited about getting Jim back into work. Jim assured Simon that another two weeks would fly by. Simon agreed and they stopped talking shop. When lunch hour was done, they both hated to leave. 

Jim drove Simon back to the station and dropped him off. Then Jim went to Blair’s office and decided he would drop off the gift baskets that he had made up for Blair and Jessica. He had taken a huge basket and filled it with chocolates and the pictures. Then he made a small one for Jessica for her cubbie at the office too. Jim felt good about both of them. 

Jim walked into the waiting room to a smiling Jessica. 

Jim said, “Delivery for Dr. Blair Sandburg and Jessica Woodruff.”

Jim handed the smaller one to Jess and then handed the bigger one to keep for Blair. “Just tell him I stopped by to thank him for everything he’s done for me.”

“Thank you, Jim. I’ll give it to him as soon as his last patient leaves. You have a good day,” Jessica called out as Jim left the waiting room. 

Jim walked to his SUV feeling like a new person. He wasn’t bribing Blair or anything. He just wanted to thank him for acting above and beyond his call of duty. The card Jim had given him explained it all. 

Jim wondered what he would do for dinner that night. Maybe he would call Connor and see what she was doing. He would think about it after he got home. The more he thought about it, he would call Simon. 

He sat in his SUV and called Simon on his cell phone. “Banks?”

“Hi Simon, I wondered if you and Rafe would like to meet me for dinner at The Outback. It sounded good. I love their lamb and thought it would be nice to go with you guys. Do you have plans already?”

“No plans yet. I’ll ask Rafe in a few moments, but even if he can’t, I’ll meet you at The Outback. That sounds wonderful,” Simon stated. 

“I’ll meet you there in two hours, would that give you enough time?” Jim asked. 

“Jim, two hours is good. We’ll see you then.” 

Simon got off the phone and called Rafe into his office. He shut the door and said, “Do you have any plans tonight?”

“No.”

“Jim Ellison asked us to meet him at The Outback and I thought if you’re not doing anything, you could be my date.”

Rafe smiled and said, “What time should I be there?”

“Why don’t you ride with me tonight? I’ll pick you up at your apartment in an hour and a half. Take off now and be ready. See you soon.” Simon was suddenly very happy about everything. 

“See you soon, Simon. I’m looking forward to it,” Rafe said as he walked out the door. 

_‘Hot damn, another date with Simon. And I thought this morning was great. This is getting better. Maybe I will transfer to Joel’s department. I adore Simon and want things to work out well.’_

 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair came out after his last patient left and he helped lock up. Blair said, “Where did the baskets come from?”

“The small one is mine and the big one is yours. They’re from Jim. He wanted to thank us in some small way for making his life bearable. The pictures that are framed and matted are all taken by him. He told me all about it in my card. He’s very talented, isn’t he?” Jessica asked. 

Blair came around behind the desk and looked through everything in the basket. He couldn’t believe how nice the basket was, let alone everything inside of it. Blair loved the pictures that Jim took. He seemed to have a good eye for art. He hadn’t said a word, but one of his favorite things was hummingbirds and two of the pictures were a matching set of hummingbirds. Blair was very impressed. He would have to thank him on Friday. Usually Blair didn’t accept presents, but he had given one to Jess too. So it wasn’t just to him. Besides, Blair really liked what was inside. 

“Would you like to go out to eat tonight?” Jess asked. 

“Yeah, that sounds good. Where are we going?” 

“How about The Golden Dragon? We haven’t eaten Chinese in ages,” Jess suggested. 

“Sounds good to me. Let’s put our baskets in my office and we’ll leave from here,” Blair said. 

They drove to The Golden Dragon talking the entire way of how the day had gone for them. It had been a good day and Blair felt as good about it as Jess did. 

They ordered dinner, ate happily and ordered some to take home for the next night. Blair then dropped Jess off at the office building to drive home. He walked her upstairs to get her basket from his office and then walked her to her car and then after saying goodbye, he went upstairs to have an evening alone to think about things. He picked up his basket and walked into his apartment. 

He read the note from Jim that was in the basket. He hadn’t even seen that before. 

_Blair,_

_I wanted to thank you in some small way and to tell you that you saved my life. I was thinking of ending it before I met you. I will always be grateful to you and your wise words. Everything you have told me has worked out for the better. Like I said before, you’re a genius. I’ll see you on Friday._

_Sincerely,_

_Jim Ellison_

Blair almost laughed. Like if Blair would think it was any other Jim. Blair knew he was doing a good job with Jim and felt good about that. Maybe while he was in this good mood, he could call his mom and see what she was up to. 

He dialed Rodney’s number in Colorado and heard it ringing. Finally she picked it up, “Hello?”

“Mom, this is Blair. How was your trip?”

“Blair honey, I want you to drop all of those silly charges on Susan. She’s going to get fired from her job. It was all a big misunderstanding. You must understand how she was feeling, am I right?”

“Mom, I’m not dropping the charges. She was attacking my patients in the lobby before they got up to my floor. That’s why she was arrested. So don’t ask me to drop them again,” Blair explained. 

“Oh honey, you have become so bitter. What is happening to you?”

“Mom, I’m not bitter. I’m happy. That’s why I called you tonight. I had a date tonight and I was in a great mood. I feel super. I wanted to brighten your day too,” Blair said. 

“I think I need to come down and talk to you about Susan. Honey, she’s not going to do well in therapy and doing jail time. The DA’s office, where she works, is talking about letting her go already. She will have no one and nothing. What will she do?”

“Naomi, what do you want me to do about it? I’m not dropping the charges. I don’t want Susan in my life anymore and I’m happy without her. Why can’t you be happy for me? Why don’t you worry about me, the way your worry about her?”

“Blair, do you realize how selfish that sounded? I can’t believe I raised you to act like this.”

“Well, mom, it might be because you didn’t do most of the raising. It was your friends that raised me. You were gone most of the time. Reality check mom, how long did you leave me in college without even checking on me? How much money did you give me to live on?”

“What are you talking about, sweetie?”

“You left me in college with no money, no where to stay and no family or friends. I had to become fast friends with people to get somewhere to move into. I had nothing. I worked two and three jobs a week so I could eat and pay tuition. That was the most important thing and you never thought about it once. But back to how long that you leave me at one time, it was two years. I was 15-17 years old and you didn’t come see me once. You were in Europe with friends and couldn’t get away. So I don’t want to hear about how you didn’t raise me to act like that. You didn’t raise me, period.” Blair slammed down the phone and sat down on the sofa. 

Blair really needed his therapist at that moment. But he didn’t want to bother Sidney Grey. Sidney would drop everything and see Blair, but Blair really didn’t want to be that big of a bother. He would see him next week as planned. It was very important that therapists see therapists. Blair went every two weeks like clockwork and Sidney did wonders for him. 

Blair got up, got his bedding, made up his bed, washed up and went to sleep. This day had to get over with and soon. Blair was very surprised when he fell right to sleep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Rafe and Simon were lying in Simon’s big bed when Simon asked, “How do you feel about me, Brian?”

“I feel great about you, Simon. I think I’m falling in love,” Rafe answered. 

“Good, then we’re both doing it at the same time. I would feel a lot better if you considered transferring to Joel’s department. That way if it get’s out, which I’m sure it will, we aren’t in the same department,” Simon suggested. 

“I’ve already decided that I’ll talk to Joel in the morning about it. Now how about a recap of what we just did?” Rafe asked as he kissed Simon’s lips. 

“You’re going to be the death of this old man,” Simon kidded. 

“At least we’ll both die happy, Simon.”

&&&&&&&&&&

**The Big Appointment:**

“Jess, who is coming in first this morning?” Blair asked. 

“Jim is your 9:00 until lunch time appointment. Then this afternoon you have four appointments,” Jess said. 

“I can’t believe its Friday already. It just seemed like it was Monday, yesterday,” Blair joked. 

Jess said, “I honestly thought Jim would be here already. He’s such an overachiever. But maybe he overslept.”

“Jess, its only 8:15. I think he has time to get here,” Blair teased. 

At that very moment the door of the waiting room opened and in walked a very happy Jim Ellison. He looked at both of them standing next to her desk and asked, “Am I late?”

Blair smiled. “Not at all, Jim. Follow me and let’s get this show on the road.”

Jim said hello to Jess on his way into Blair’s office. 

Jim said, “Good morning, Blair. I slept like a log and feel so good today it isn’t even funny. I can’t thank you enough for everything you have done for me.”

It was Blair’s turn to smile. “Sit down and let’s get started.”

Jim took his seat and got comfortable. Blair sat behind his desk and asked, “So where do you want to begin?”

“I wanted to start with my dad and my brother Steven. I called and asked them both to dinner, but my dad said he’d rather me come over to his house on Sunday and watch a game and have dinner at 5:00. Steven would be there too. And I agreed to that. But on Tuesday, I was bored and called my dad to see if he wanted to have dinner with me and he said yes. My brother came along too. It was so nice seeing them. I told you about that part when I talked to you on the phone. But I’m going to see them again on Sunday for the game and I’m going to meet Pam, Steven’s better half too. I’m very excited about meeting her. So that’s what I have planned for the weekend. It’s going to be great.”

“That sounds so good. I’m so glad that you made the call and everything went well. Do you feel good about seeing them? I know you were a little confused the other night. Do you feel better about it now?” Blair asked. 

“Yes, I feel really good about seeing them. I can’t wait for Sunday. Some day I hope to have someone on my arm to take over to my dad’s house. Now that would be something,” Jim said laughing. 

“Why are you laughing?” 

“My dad isn’t one of the most open men in the world. I can’t imagine him being pleased with me dating men. Then there is the no grandchildren rule, dating men too. I just know he wouldn’t understand or be happy for me.”

“You never know, Jim. Don’t put labels on your dad that he might not even fit into. Let’s play this by ear and see how it goes. You’ll meet someone very soon and your life will never be the same. I promise you.”

“Somehow, I totally believe that, Blair. Everything you tell me turns out right, so I believe you. I’m not going to guess how dad would feel about something like that. I would just tell him outright and go from there.”

The buzzer buzzed on Blair’s desk and he answered it, “Jess, is something wrong?”

“I wanted to let you know that Susan is downstairs again trying to start trouble. We lost a new patient that was just coming in to fill out the paperwork. I didn’t know what to do.”

“I’ll ask Jim what to do and we’ll take it from here,” Blair said as he closed the communication between them. 

“Is it Susan again?” Jim asked. 

“Susan’s downstairs and she scared off another new client that was coming in to fill out paperwork. They called and told Jess that they were afraid to come any further,” Blair said. 

Jim handed Blair his phone and said, “Call Rafe, he’s number 27 on the phone. And tell him that I need him to take that woman into custody again today. I’ll take care of her downstairs. I still have my badge. She doesn’t have to know that I’m off on medical leave.”

“Jim, I don’t want you to get in any type of trouble. Be careful and don’t get too close to her. She’s meaner then a wild animal.”

Jim walked out of Blair’s office and out the waiting room door without even looking at Jess. She smiled when she saw the look on his face. In a few moments, Jess would feel sorry for Susan. 

&&&&&&&&&&&

“Detective Rafe, this is Blair Sandburg. Jim Ellison just asked me to call you and tell you that the woman you picked up the other day is back in my lobby creating havoc. He said to hurry, please.”

“I’ll be right there, Sandburg,” Rafe said as he hung up his phone and told Simon where he was going. Then he was _‘so’_ out of there. 

When Rafe arrived at the lobby of the doctor’s office, he saw Jim holding the woman in a really good hold. She was fighting him like crazy. Rafe walked in and said, “Trouble with the little woman, Jim?”

“I’m not his little woman. Get away from me, both of you. I have a right to be here. This man was supposed to be my husband. Now he’s seeing some man. It’s a sickness and I need to tell his patients about it,” Susan ranted and raved. 

“Susan Stafford, you are under arrest. I’m here to take you downtown and get the charges all brought against you,” Rafe shouted over her ranting. He got his cuffs out and put them on her. It took both Jim and Rafe to do that. She was a spit-fire. 

“I have a right to say whatever I want.” Susan was still screaming. 

“No, you don’t. Not when you’re on someone else’s property and you are slandering their name. Let’s go downtown and bring all of the charges again and maybe this time the judge will keep you inside the jail cell instead of giving you bail. Rafe shoved her into the back seat and dreaded the ride back to the station. Thankfully it wasn’t too far. Rafe hated women like this. Actually he hated any gender that behaved like this. 

“Thank you again, Rafe. She’s cost him an arm and a leg in patient loss.”

“No problem, Jim. Talk to you later on. See you soon, I hope.”

Jim opened up his telepathy and listened to her thoughts. _‘I’m going to kill that little fucker when I get out this time.’_

“He went over to Rafe’s side of the car and whispered, “She wants to kill him. I just heard her. Don’t let her out for anything.”

“Okay, then I heard it too. Talk to you soon,” Rafe said as he took off down the street with the screaming woman in his back seat. 

Jim walked back upstairs to Blair’s office, he needed the time to calm down. When he got back into the office, Blair said, “Did it go all right?”

“It went fine, but she said she wanted to kill you, so now it’s a death threat. This will all go into her file and she’ll be charged for that. She won’t be getting out so easily this time. And if she does, I have a spare room at my house that would be perfect for you.”

“Jim, I’m not going to stay at your house. I have security on my apartment off of my office. I’m secure knowing she can’t get to me without me seeing her first. Stop worrying. I was going to ask you today if you thought I was over-reacting, but I guess that question is out now.”

Jim smiled and said, “Okay, do I pick up where we left off? Or did you want to calm down some?”

“I want you to continue, it’ll keep my mind off of everything. I’m anxious to hear what else you did this week.”

“I called Connor and asked her for dinner. She mentioned that Joel was still working too and I asked her to ask him to go along with us and she said she would. Come to find out, they were smitten right away. We had a wonderful time at Saccony’s Restaurant. We laughed, talked and just had an excellent night. Joel asked her out on a date-date for the following evening. They were very cute. Then I asked them if they wanted to see a game next week and Connor insisted on getting the tickets and the three of us would go. So that’ll be nice. We’re going in three weeks, the team is playing away games until then. She was so happy, Blair, you should have seen her light up when she was around Joel. Actually she even lit up around me. I think she’s been very lonely. Thank you so much for telling me to try this. I made her night and she’s very excited about the game. She’s really a nice girl and I really like Joel too. They’re going to be a good couple I can tell. The only thing I don’t like about Connor is that she calls me Jimbo.”

Blair laughed for a moment at the Jimbo remark and said, “It sounds like you had an excellent time. I’m so glad you took me up on some of my suggestions. Thank you for trusting me, Jim.”

“Thank you, for suggesting them. There was only one thing I didn’t look into and that was my mother. I realized that it might come later, but right now, I don’t care if I find her or not. So I must not be ready yet. While I’m at the loft, I piggy back my senses to see how good I can do it and it’s coming along very well. I turn off the telepathy easily now and same with my senses. I’m in control of the dials all the time. I realize that sometimes I’ll be a little out of control, but for now, things look well. What do you think?” Jim asked. 

“Jim, I know this is going to sound very strange, but I think that as long as you keep coming once a week, you could go back to work and be Connor’s partner. I don’t see a problem. If you do have problems, you know what to do. You call me and we set up more appointments. What do you think about going back to work? And do you feel comfortable enough to tell Connor about your abilities? She has to know. She has to be able to back you up no matter what. Do you think you can trust her?”

“I would trust her with my life, so I guess the stories I’m going to tell her will be easy enough for her to hear. I might tell Joel at the same time so that everyone is on the same page. Do you think that makes sense?” Jim asked. 

“Perfect sense, Jim.” 

Blair wrote out the paper that he needed Jess to type up and took it out to her. She came in about ten minutes later with three different copies and Blair signed all of them. 

“What day off do you have, so we can set up weekly appointments?”

“I’m off on Tuesday’s and Sunday’s,” Jim answered. 

“Tuesday it is. We’ll set you up for the 9:00 appointment if that’s all right with you,” Jess said. 

“That’s fine. Every Tuesday at 9:00. I like having a set appointment. Thank you both for doing this for me,” Jim said happily. 

“No problem,” Jess said as she left the office. 

Blair laughed and said, “She thinks she’s the boss.”

“I thought she was,” Jim said. 

They both laughed and then got back to talking again. Jim stayed there for his entire 2 hour visit and got a lot of things off his chest. He felt great when he left that day. But the papers he had in his hand were the best part of the entire thing. He wasn’t going to be bored any longer. He was going to be back at work tomorrow. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Jim came out of the office, he had to check his messages. He sat down across from a woman waiting in Blair’s waiting room. He turned up his sense because she looked lost. 

_‘I don’t think I can do this much longer. He wants to help me, I’m sure, but I just don’t think he can do it. I’ve got enough pills to take care of things when I get home. Sometimes things aren’t meant to be.’_

Jim moved over next to her and said, “You look lost and sad. I just wanted to tell you that you have come to the right doctor. When I first started coming I was on the verge of suicide, but within a couple of weeks, he’s turned my life around. I had to work along with him, but it was worth it. I’m a cop, so I always had the weapon right there. I’m so glad I didn’t. I would be missing out on a lot of things that Blair has talked me into doing. Is this your first or second week?” 

“This is my first week. I’ve never seen him before. I’ve only talked with him on the phone,” the woman answered. 

“You’re in for a treat. I kid you not; he’s the most caring doctor I’ve ever been to. Give him a chance, okay?” Jim asked. 

“If you swear that he’s that good, then I’ll listen to him. Thank you for talking with me. I feel better already. Now don’t let me keep you.”

“I don’t mind waiting with you. You look nervous. There is no reason to be. When you meet him, you’ll understand what I’m talking about,” Jim assured her. 

Jessica stood up and said, “Monica, it’s time to see Dr. Sandburg.”

Monica stood up and so did Jim. “It was very nice meeting you, Monica.”

“It was nice meeting you too,” Monica answered. 

Jim pulled out one of his cards from work and gave it to her. “If you ever need help, just call. I’m home a lot,” Jim said with a smile on his face. 

She looked at the card and said, “Goodbye, Jim.”

She walked into Blair’s office and Jim hoped that things would be all right for her. He had no right listening, so it’s not like he could call Blair and tell him what she said. He sighed and walked out of the waiting room. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair introduced himself to Monica and said, “What can I help you with?”

“First of all, there was a patient named Jim out in the waiting room that assured me that you’re the best that there is, so I feel good about that. Secondly, I was considering suicide this morning and I hope to still be around next week. You have a good voice. I hope you can help me,” Monica said. 

Blair and Monica began her visit and Blair knew he would have his hands full. He was never going to bring this up to Jim, but he would forever be grateful to him for his kind words to this lost soul. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim got down to the parking lot and called Connor. 

“Connor.”

“Hi Connor, it’s me. I wanted to know if you and Joel can come over tonight, it’s important that I talk to you both,” Jim asked. 

“Sure, what time do you want us to come over?” She asked. 

“Right after dinner would be good for me. About 7:00 or so?”

“Okay, we’ll see you at 7:00, Jimbo.” 

Jim felt better knowing that was taken care of. He went home to the loft and faxed the papers from Blair to Simon’s office. Simon called him right afterwards and said, “Holy shit, you can come back tomorrow?”

“Yes, I’ll be there at 8:00 as usual. I’m going to have a meeting with Joel and Connor tonight and tell them about my abilities so that they’re aware of them. Then I’m going to teach a few things to Connor to back me up if I go into a zone. We’ll be all set by tomorrow morning,” Jim replied. 

“Sounds like you have it all under control. Good, I’m glad to hear it. Oh before I forget, the girl that was giving Sandburg the hard time, overdosed on pills today. The judge let her out on bail again and this time, she had to answer to too many people I guess. So they rushed her to the hospital and pumped her stomach and she’ll be in the mental ward for some time. The doctor said she’s completely delusional and she was talking about death threats. So they’re going to keep her for a long, long while.”

“Good, I’m glad to hear it. It’s about time they listened to what she was saying. She’s totally off her rocker,” Jim pointed out. 

“See you tomorrow, Jim,” Simon said cheerily. 

“Okay, can’t wait to get started again, Simon. Thanks for everything.”

Jim hung up and cleaned up the loft for the company that was coming that night. He ran to the store to get beer and some snacks. He wasn’t used to having company, so this was unusual. He was getting with the program, though. Before long he was ready for his company and was looking forward to seeing their faces as he told them what he had to say. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim called Blair while he was waiting for Joel and Connor to show up. Blair answered his cell on the first ring. “Dr. Sandburg, can I help you?”

“Hi Blair, I just wanted to tell you what’s going on with Susan.” Jim went on to explain everything that Simon had told him that afternoon and Jim could hear Blair sighing. 

“Do you still think I did the right thing, Jim?”

“Yes, Blair, I do. She’s insane. She needs help more then anyone I’ve ever seen. They’ll help her and maybe, just maybe you could end up being friends when this is all said and done.”

“I don’t know about that. I think she’s going to harbor great resentment towards me, so it’ll never be easy for us. But I’m glad she’s getting help.”

“I have Connor and Joel coming over tonight, so I better go,” Jim said. 

“See you on Tuesday,” Blair answered. 

&&&&&&&&&&

At seven that night, Joel Taggart and Megan Connor showed up at Jim Ellison’s loft. Jim opened the door and said, “Come on in.”

They came in and sat on the sofa. Jim asked, “Can I get you a beer, a soft drink or bottled water?” 

Connor said, “I would love a beer. Thank you.”

“Me too,” Joel replied. 

Jim got three beers and sat down across from them and said, “I have some important things to tell the two of you. Connor, I’m coming back to work tomorrow and you're going to be my partner at all times. But if something comes up, Joel is our backup, so therefore I have to tell you both everything you need to know about me.”

“You’ve got my attention, Jimbo.”

“Mine too,” Joel replied. 

Jim sat there and told them all about the five heightened senses and what he could do with them. He explained how he would be able to use them for helping with a case and went on and told them everything they needed to know about these senses. Then he told them about the telepathy and Connor said, “No way.”

“Way,” Jim answered. 

“You’re joking,” Joel said almost irritated. 

Jim turned his dial up so he could sense what they were thinking and he heard Joel think, _‘Simon must have put him up to this to see how stupid we are. I’m not happy with either of them.’_

“Sorry, Joel, it has nothing to do with Simon. I can read your thoughts. Not all the time, but I can right now and I know you think this is some type of trick and it’ll come back to haunt you. Well, you don’t have to worry about that, because it’s true. I swear to you, Joel.”

Connor thought, _‘Oh my god what if it’s true, none of us would ever have a secret again.’_

“Connor, you’re absolutely right. You wouldn’t have any secrets, that’s why I choose to keep it down, so I can’t read my friends' minds. I don’t want to be in your thoughts anymore then you want me there.”

“Joel, he can read our thoughts,” Connor said. 

“No shit. Jim, this is going to be so helpful when it comes to suspects and witnesses. Don’t you think?” Joel asked. 

“Yes. Now I can’t hear your thoughts anymore. I’ve turned it down so that you can have privacy. Your thoughts are not what I want in my mind either,” Jim explained. 

Jim then told Joel and Connor all about the Zone Out factor and what they could do to bring him out of a zone. He told them what to watch for in his personality and change in moods. By the time they were all done discussing it, it was 10:00 at night. It was hard to believe that they had talked about this for three hours. 

“I need to get some sleep, Jimbo. See you tomorrow.” Connor got up and walked towards the door. 

“Jim, this is a secret though, right? I mean we can’t tell Brown and Rafe, am I right?” Joel asked. 

“If we told everyone, Joel, it would no longer be a secret. So I’ll see you both tomorrow. Drive careful and goodnight.” Jim walked them downstairs and watched them drive out of the parking lot. 

He felt pretty good about life in general. He walked back up to the loft and locked up and got ready for bed. When he set his alarm he felt so good about it, he could hardly contain his smile and happiness. 

He had missed work something fierce. He missed griping at Brown and Rafe all day long. He missed teasing them. He just missed them, period, especially Brown with his mama stories. He would tell the best Mama Brown stories and make everyone laugh in the bullpen. Henri Brown was a wonderful cop, but a total nut job. Jim lay in bed and before he knew it he was asleep.

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim dreamed of the blue jungle once again. But this time the jaguar and the wolf weren’t walking they were curled up side by side sleeping. Jim felt good seeing the spirit animals like this and wasn’t quite sure what it meant, but it might mean that Blair would mean more to him as time went on. Jim was fine with that. He sure hoped Blair was fine with that too. 

For right now, Jim knew he would have to keep the thoughts to himself, because Blair was his doctor. Doctor’s don’t date their patients. One of these days he would be well and Blair would no longer be his doctor and Jim knew then he could make his move. 

Jim woke up for a few moments and thought about the jungle, but was too tired to put much thought into it. Instead, he stretched and rolled onto his side and went to sleep. 

Blair was doing the very same thing at exactly the same time at his home. Blair wondered about the jungle dream, but decided to ignore it for now. If it continued, he would have to talk to Jim about it. But for right now, he just wanted to sleep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

**Back to work:**

 

Jim was never so thrilled to be at work in his life. He was there an hour early, just to try and catch up on paperwork. 

Connor came in early too that morning and said, “We have a case already. Simon called me while I was in the elevator. It’s a child molester. The little girl is 8 and she is giving a description to the sketch artist right now. I hear she’s got a really good memory and a mind for faces. This will help a lot. There is a child molester that lives down her street and Rafe and Brown are picking him up right now. I’m hoping he’s going to match the sketch and we’ll be done with it.”

“I want to get a chance at using my gift into what he’s thinking. That will help a lot. I could tell you before we even get the sketch,” Jim said. 

“Oh here comes Rafe and Brown now. Let’s see where they take him,” Connor got up and followed the men and the suspect into interrogation room 1. Brown locked him up to the table and then walked out to the hallway where everyone was having a meeting. 

“Let’s let Jim get first crack at him and see if he can tell anything by just talking to him,” Connor suggested. 

“That’s fine by me, I hate molesters,” Brown said with disgust. 

“Well, it’s not like I like them, Brown. But we have to ask questions,” Jim said as he walked into the room. He turned up his sense a little and could hear the man repeating a mantra. 

Jim heard his thoughts, _‘Please don’t put me in a cell with anyone else. I was home. I was home. I was home.’_

“So where were you last night?” Jim asked. 

“I was home. I don’t have an alibi. I was home. I swear, I didn’t touch anyone. The last time I got picked up, I went through the therapy and got the surgery to stop all my sexual drive. I don’t do anything anymore. I’ll take a polygraph test and you’ll find out I was home,” Martin Smith said. 

“I’ll be right back,” Jim said as he left the room. In the hallway, Brown said, “Oh don’t tell me you’re falling for his shit line.”

“Brown, I think he’s innocent. We need the sketch first and then we’ll go and ask questions from her friends and relatives. Rafe, do you think you could go find the sketch. It shouldn’t be taking that long to get up here,” Jim said. 

Brown was totally disgusted and said, “What surgery was he talking about?”

“He got neutered. It’s something they can do if they want to stay out of trouble. The program seems to work and I can’t honestly see him grabbing someone if he has no desire to,” Jim pointed out. Although, Jim wasn’t really sure about how good the program worked in actuality. He had never asked anyone about it before. 

Brown went to look for Rafe and Connor said, “He said he didn’t do it?”

“He just repeated over and over again that he was home. He didn’t seem alarmed about being picked out of a line up. He was only worried about being put into a cell with another man. So I don’t think it’s him. We’ll split up the family members and friends of the little girl today and see if we can’t find this person. It might be someone that knew her but she didn’t know him,” Jim said. 

“Okay, we’ll take the friends and they can have the family. Family isn’t as likely do you think?” Connor asked. 

“I don’t have a clue, Connor. We’re going to have to do old fashioned police work on this one.”

Rafe and Brown came up and gave Jim and Connor a sketch of the man. It wasn’t Martin Smith. “Take him home, Rafe and Brown. And don’t man-handle him, he didn’t do anything.”

“This time, maybe,” Brown growled. 

“We’re going to take the friends on the list and you can take the family members. We’re going to get started right now. See you later,” Jim said. 

Connor had the addresses, names and the sketches. They went to four houses with no luck what-so-ever. They felt like they were barking up the wrong tree, but then when the got to the fifth house, the man that answered the door looked a little like the sketch. 

“Hello, I’m Detective Jim Ellison and this is Detective Megan Connor. We’re investigating a child molestation charge and it was one of your son’s friends. So we have to check with all friends and family. I hope you don’t mind answering some questions. We need to talk to adult males in the house.”

“Certainly, come in. I’m Sheldon Mitchell. Sit down here in the living room and I’ll get my sons, and my brother and we’ll talk to you. I take it you mean, men?” 

“Yes, men,” Connor answered. 

They said nothing about the sketch, because the man looked a little like it, but not totally like it. But when Sheldon Mitchell’s brother walked in they knew they had their man.

“This is my brother Seth and my sons, Samuel and Scott. What do you need to ask us?”

Jim said, “Your sons can leave. We don’t need anything from them right now. If you and your brother could answer some questions it would be great.”

Scott and Samuel left the room, happily. They seemed totally relieved. Jim opened up his senses and heard, _‘They’ll never believe the child over me. I’m a doctor in the community for crying out loud. Why are they even talking to us?’_

Jim was angry immediately and said, “Mr. Mitchell, what do you think of this sketch?” Jim showed him the sketch and he looked at the sketch and then looked at his brother. 

“Oh my God, Seth, what have you done?” Sheldon asked sounding every bit as horrified as he was. 

“I don’t even know who it was. This is just a fluke. I’m a respected doctor of the community and no one is going to take some 8 year old’s version of what happened over mine,” Seth said. 

“We never said how old the child was. You just told us her age. Would you like to call your lawyer now? You’re going to go downtown and be in a line up and this little eight year old is going to pick you out. She remembers everything you did to her.” Connor said. 

Sheldon said, “Don’t say any more, Seth. Wait until we get the lawyer. We have to figure this out. I can’t believe you would do something like that, so I know she made it up. She’s probably a friend of one of our kids.”

Jim said, “She’s a friend to one of the boys. She didn’t know the molester, she just gave a really good description of the man that ruined her life. Did you do things to your nephews too?”

“Oh my God, Seth, please tell me you didn’t do anything to my sons,” Sheldon pleaded. 

“I would want them to talk to a therapist right away. He might have done something to them. We have a good therapist that would see them as quickly as possible. She specializes in rape and molestation cases,” Connor said. 

Seth Mitchell must have taken a stupid pill that day because he decided to run. Jim had him in three strides and took him down to the floor. Jim handcuffed him and Connor and Jim took him out to the SUV to transport him to the station. 

Connor went back into the house and gave a card to Mr. Mitchell, with Martha Clinger’s name on it. She was the specialist that Connor had been talking about. She could tell that Mr. Mitchell was going to need therapy too. He was devastated. 

When Connor went back outside, Jim was ready to go. He handed the keys to Connor and said, “I might have to write something down while I listen to him. So I need you to drive.”

She drove and Jim listened. He found out that he was able to listen to just one person if he wanted to. He wasn’t sure how he did that, but he was doing it. He just focused and it happened. He heard, _‘Thank God, they won’t look at any of my patients. They would put me away forever if they thought I had done what I had done to all of them. I’m going to get the last laugh. They don’t know about the twenty cases that weren’t reported._

Jim turned around and said, “Oh by the way, it’s going to be broadcasted this afternoon after the line up and all of your patients will see that someone came forward and they will too. You’re not getting away with anything. We’re going to get your records of who you saw and when and talk to them as soon as possible.”

“You can’t do that. It’s privileged information. You haven’t got a leg to stand on so you can shut your big mouth, cop,” Seth Mitchell spat out. 

Jim heard, _‘They will never talk because I threatened their parents. I’m safe.’_

“How safe do you think you’d be if the children went to the parents and told them that you threatened their parents' lives? You threatened this little eight year old, but she didn’t care. And isn’t it funny how she has a photographic memory. What are the chances of that happening?” Jim asked. 

Connor smiled when she saw the green tint on the man’s face. It was a very sickly green and Megan knew that Jim had been right. He had listened just right. 

There were no more thoughts or talking for the rest of the drive to the station. They booked him, had him in the line up and the little girl picked him out easily and was very brave about it. Jim was right. His picture and his line of work was on the news that night. They were getting calls left and right from parents saying their child had been molested. It was going to take forever to get all of those papers filed, but they all knew it would be worth it. Twenty-two counts of molestation was a good case to get off the street. Today had been a very good day. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim was sitting at his desk typing up some of the newer reports that had come in and he smelled something wonderful. He looked up and saw a delivery man bring something over to his desk. “You, Detective Ellison?”

“Yes, why?”

“I have dinner for you and Detective Connor from a Captain Joel Taggart. He asked me to deliver it as soon as possible. Here you go. Sandwiches, chips and a soda for each of you.”

Jim got up and gave him a generous tip and sat down and started to eat one of the sandwiches. Megan came flying through when she smelled the food and said, “Oh my god, you ordered food?”

“Joel did. We have to thank him later,” Jim said with a smile on his face. 

“Well, I know I’m going to be thanking him later, what did you have in mind?” Connor teased. 

“Telling him thank you for being a great friend will be enough from me,” Jim admitted. 

They finished up eating everything and drinking their soda and felt much better about the day. They had been going since that morning and had no lunch. Well, Jim had a candy bar for lunch and that was it. 

“Connor we’re off tomorrow so we’ll finish the rest of these files on Monday. How does that sound?”

“That’s good for me. I was afraid you would want to work our day off and I had plans,” Megan answered. 

“Nope, I have plans too. I’m going to my dad’s house for dinner and a game. My brother is bringing his girlfriend and I finally get to meet her. It’s going to be a great day.”

They both finished up what paperwork was needed for that day and then left for the evening. Jim was exhausted. He had forgotten how hard it was working. That week off had made him soft. 

In the parking garage, Jim saw Joel and walked up to him and said, “Thank you so much for thinking about us with the delivery. We were starving. You saved both of our lives.”

“It was my pleasure, Jim. You two work too hard. Have a good day off tomorrow,” Joel called out over his shoulder as he started to walk away. 

“Thank you, I will.” Jim walked towards his SUV and got in. He was a very lucky man to have such great friends. 

&&&&&&&&&&

**Game Day:**

Jim was ready to go to his dad’s at about 10:00, but he knew he couldn’t go over that early. So he decided to do something really thrilling like clean his bathroom. He spent two hours doing it and you could eat off the floors by the time he was done. Jim didn’t mean to be so anal. It was just what he had learned in the military. They were tough. Jim was tougher. 

Finally at one o’clock Jim decided he could show up a little early over at his dad's. That way maybe he could even see Sally. He hadn’t seen her in years either. He drove over there and parked out front and walked up to the door. He went to knock and William opened the door. 

“Jimmy, you’re early, how nice. Come in. You can see Sally. She was just getting some snacks ready for our game,” William said as he ushered Jim in through the door. 

“I hope you don’t mind that I’m early, dad. I was bored.”

“Don’t mind at all, Jimmy. Don’t worry about it.” As they walked into the kitchen Sally saw Jim and said, “Jimmy, how wonderful to see you.”

Jim gave her a huge hug and kissed her cheek. “It’s so good to see you, Sally. I’m sorry I haven’t been around. I will be from now on. You and dad are going to be sick of me.”

“We would never be sick of Jimmy, would we, William?” Sally asked. 

“Never,” William agreed. 

“I made homemade caramel corn for snacks and a Chex Snack Mix. It’s all done and ready to eat. You enjoy. I have to go to my sister’s house. I will see you next Sunday, Jimmy. Come over early and keep me company in the kitchen,” Sally ordered. 

“I will Sally, I’m coming early next time.” Jim hugged and kissed her goodbye and he felt bad when she left. He had forgotten how much Sally had meant to him. 

“Dad, could I ask you something,” Jim asked after Sally shut the door. 

“You can ask me anything,” William answered. 

“Where is my mother?”

“She’s in Seattle, married with three children, I think. They might be his children, I’m not sure. She seems to be doing all right. She came down once to see you boys but you were off at camp. I told her to never come again. She chose a life with another man and wanted to have his children. She only wanted to see you boys once a month or every other month. I wouldn’t hear of it. You’re either a real mother or you’re not. Her name is Grace Phillips and her husband’s name is George. If you need their number, I have it,” William said. 

“Dad, didn’t you ever want us to see her?”

“No. She made her choice. She didn’t like being married to me, so she married someone else. I have no idea what her life is like now, but she had a good life here. She had two boys who were crazy about her and yet when she left, she didn’t take you with her. She said she had to live for a while first and then she would send for you. She never did. I’m sorry I’m so hateful, but I think she wronged you boys all of those years and I never got over it. I was bitter for many, many years and I know I took it out on you boys. Now, I would love if she wanted to see you boys, but she never calls.”

“Would you be upset if I contacted her to see her some day?” Jim asked. 

“No, she’s your mother, if you want to see her, then do,” William busied himself with something in the kitchen so he didn’t look at Jim. 

“Dad, I’m really glad that we’re seeing each other again. I can’t tell you how much the other night meant to me.”

“Same here, Jimmy. Steven and I both said you were the bigger person for making that first step. Thank you for doing that. We’re glad to have you back in our life.”

Jim smiled at his dad and said, “Let’s go in and watch the pregame show, dad.”

“Sounds good, but I have to ask you something before Steven gets here,” William said quietly. 

Jim knew what was coming. He just knew it. 

“I heard from someone at the club that they saw you going in to a gay bar some months ago. Jimmy, are you gay?”

“Yes, dad, I am. I’m sorry for not telling you, but I didn’t want to upset you or Steven.”

“Let’s not tell Steven for right now. He’s better off in the dark about it, I think. I don’t know how I feel about it, Jimmy. Are you seeing anyone right now?”

“No. I have someone in mind, but it might take a while to get his attention,” Jim confessed. 

“Why?”

“He’s my therapist and I can’t date him while I’m seeing him. So I have to get better and then ask him out. He’s fantastic, dad. He’s one of the nicest men I know and I can tell you right now, you would love him.”

“So why don’t you go to a different therapist and then ask this man out?”

“He’s good for me. I want to wait until the therapy is all done and then I can leave his office for good. Then when I go in there, I can ask him out and be free.”

“Well, I wish you luck, Jimmy. I guess that means I’ll have to rely on Steven for grandchildren.”

“There is always adoption. I like kids, I can’t imagine that Blair doesn’t like kids too. So maybe some day in the future we’ll have kids also.”

“Come on, Jimmy, let’s watch the pre-game show,” William said as he led Jim into the living room. 

They were getting into the pre-game show when Steven and Pam showed up. Jim stood up to meet her and realized he already knew her. She smiled and said, “Hello Jim.”

“You know my brother?” Steven asked. 

“Yes, he was on my case years ago. I will never forget how helpful he was to me. In case you forgot, I’m Pam Meyers.”

Jim shook hands with her and said, “I didn’t forget. You look magnificent.”

“You didn’t even mention that you knew him,” Steven stated. 

“That’s because I didn’t know for sure until I just saw him. I’m sorry Steven, I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. Are you upset?” Pam asked. 

“No, but how in the world did you two ever meet?” Steven asked and Jim looked at the floor. 

No one said anything. 

“Something bad happened to you, years ago?” Steven asked once more. 

“Yes, Steven, but I didn’t want to tell you about it. Men tend to run the other way when someone is damaged,” Pam said very sadly. 

“Pam, you are not damaged. You’re one of the strongest humans I have ever met. I’m proud to have you in the family. You can tell Steven about what happened or not. It doesn’t matter. You’re still Pam, his girlfriend and my friend too.”

Jim hugged her and she gladly accepted it. Steven said, “We’ll be back. Dad, we’re going to borrow your office.”

As soon as they walked away, William said, “Something horrible?”

“Yes, something horrid and I hate that she has to remember it today. I feel terrible,” Jim said. 

Steven and Pam came walking out of William’s office about 30 minutes later, with red eyes and blowing their noses. They both sat side by side on the sofa and Steven held on to her like he was going to lose her. Jim was so glad to see that Steven took it all right. 

William didn’t bring up a thing, instead he went and got the snacks and ate goodies with everyone. They watched the start of the game and Steven was very attentive of Pam. Jim was very grateful that Steven wasn’t an ass. 

Jim thought back to the night they found her and she was gang banged by six men. She was ripped to pieces and the only one she would let get close to her was Jim. So Jim was always at the hospital asking questions and getting things for the trial. They found all six of the men and she put up with a lot of crap in her life, just going through that hearing. But the worst thing in the world was she had to have a hysterectomy and was unable to have children. She was robbed of everything a person could imagine. Now Steven would have to deal with this knowledge. Jim hoped they would remain a couple because she was one of the strongest people he had ever met in his life. 

&&&&&&&&&&

They rooted and cheered for their team, and their team was winning, so William was in a very good mood. Jim helped William put the food for dinner on the table and helped him set the table too. Jim felt like he was home again. At one point, he went over and just hugged his dad. 

“I love you too, son.”

“Thank you, dad.”

After dinner, they all helped clean up in the kitchen and finally at about 7:00 everyone was tired and ready to head home. Jim said goodbye to everyone and took his leave. Steven followed him out to his SUV and said, “She told me when we met that she couldn’t have children. But she didn’t tell me why. I never dreamed that it would be something like that. She’s a keeper, Jimmy. I hope you don’t mind that I’m keeping her around, because I’m going to ask her to marry me tonight.”

Jim hugged his brother and said, “I couldn’t be happier for anyone. You both deserve a happy life. Have you ever considered adoption?” 

“One thing at a time, Jimmy. I could care less about kids at the moment. But years from now she may want to. So we’ll keep it on the back burner,” Steven added. 

“Steven, are you asking her just because she had something horrible happen to her?”

“No, Jim, I have the ring in my pocket and was planning on asking tonight anyway. Don’t worry, I’m not going to do anything to hurt that woman. She’s my life. I love her.”

“Good, glad to hear it.” Jim hugged Steven close. 

“Drive careful, Jimmy.”

“See you next Sunday. Good luck with the proposal,” Jim said as he got into his SUV and drove away. 

Jim smiled all the way home. His dad knew he was gay and it didn’t ruin things. Life didn’t stop as he knew it. His sister-in-law-to-be was once one of his favorite people from the past and now they would all be one happy family. Jim couldn’t wait to tell Blair on Tuesday.

&&&&&&&&&&

**Therapy Day:**

Jim was very excited about seeing Blair again. He found himself thinking about Blair all the time. But not only that, he was now dreaming about Blair. Not the wolf, Blair. He dreamed of Blair naked, he dreamed of Blair sleeping, he dreamed of them lying in bed together. There was little that Jim didn’t visualize with Blair in it. It was going to be hard to keep up with the appearance of being just his patient. 

When he walked into the office, Jessica smiled at him as usual and he sat down and waited for her to take him into Blair’s office. 

Jim heard the buzzer on her phone and knew it was going to be soon. 

“Jim, follow me,” Jess said happily. “Did you see where I put the pictures up that you gave me?”

Jim looked over at her cubby-desk area and saw them on the wall. It looked very nice. It made him feel good that Jess liked them enough to do that. 

“Thank you, Jess. I didn’t know if they were actually good enough to hang up. You’ve made my day,” Jim said, happily. 

“Of course they’re good enough, Jim.” 

She opened Blair’s door and said, “Dr. Sandburg, Jim Ellison is here.”

Jim walked in and could tell Blair was upset about something. Jim couldn’t stand it anymore, once Jess shut the door he said, “What did I do?”

“You didn’t do anything. But I’m having some troubles. I might need you to see a new doctor,” Blair said.

“You’re getting rid of me?” Jim asked looking lost. 

“Jim, I’m having feelings about you and I’m having dreams about you. Not the jaguar but you. I can’t be your doctor when I’m having those feelings.”

“Oh, well in that case, I’m having feelings about you too. I didn’t know how to tell you. You’re in my dreams all the time. Sometimes even my day dreams,” Jim confessed. 

Blair burst out laughing and said, “Oh my God, I’m doing the very same thing. So you wouldn’t be upset if I asked you to go to another doctor?”

“Is he good?” Jim asked. 

“Of course he’s good. I’ve already told him about you and he can’t wait to meet you. So this will be the last time I see you as a patient. You can call me and ask me out if you’d like to.”

“What’s this doctor’s name?” Jim asked. 

“Doctor Sean Gabriel. He’s really good, Jim. And he’s looking so forward to working with you. He’s trustworthy and reliable. So you should have no troubles what so ever.”

“We can now talk about dating?” Jim asked. 

“No…This is my office, Jim. I’m a professional and I don’t talk about dating my patients in my office.”

“When is your next appointment?” Jim asked. 

“It’s in two hours. Your appointment is for two hours.”

“Could we go for coffee?” Jim asked. 

“Let’s go through this door and you’ll be in my home. It’s not much, but it’s a place we can talk about us in.” Blair buzzed Jess and told her he would be in his apartment.

Jim followed Blair into the small apartment and smiled. “It doesn’t remind me of you at all.” 

“I just wanted something small to relax in when I was alone. At the time I was lonely and didn’t want a big place,” Blair admitted. 

“So how would you like to go out for dinner tonight?” Jim asked. 

“I would love that but I need to ask some questions before we go anywhere with our relationship. How do you feel about being a bottom?”

Jim just looked at him oddly and said, “I don’t know. I never have.”

“So you would never switch?” Blair asked. 

“I didn’t say I would never switch, I just never have. I might do a lot of things when it comes to you.”

“How do you feel about being out, because I’m not a secret,” Blair said firmly. 

Jim smiled and said, “I could be out. I would be proud to be out with you.”

“Are you serious? You couldn’t be out with Cameron, but you’ll be out with me?” Blair wondered. 

“Well, first of all, he was Cameron and you’re Blair Sandburg. There is a world of difference. I like you. You look fantastic and I would be proud to say your mine and I’m yours.” Jim smiled. He knew he was sounding superficial. 

“So just like that, you would become a bottom?”

“Want to try it out?” Jim asked. 

“No…We’re not having sex yet. We’re dating for a while first. I just can’t believe you’re being so reasonable with me.” 

“I’ve been seeing you naked in my dreams. God, I hope you look the same in real life.”

Blair burst out laughing and kissed Jim. Jim kissed him back except with much passion attached. 

“I’ve been dreaming of you naked too. So, in a week or two, we’ll find out for sure,” Blair said. 

“A fucking week or two?” Jim shouted. 

“You don’t think I’m worth wooing?” Blair asked. 

“Of course, I do. I think you’re worth anything at all. But I’m horny. I’m going to be a mess until we go to bed together,” Jim admitted. 

“So where are you taking me to dinner tonight?” Blair asked. 

“How about Thai food? The Red Dragon is a really good restaurant and I think you would like it a lot. The booths are cozy and very personal. I would love to take you there, if you like Thai food,” Jim suggested. 

“I love Thai food and that sounds very nice. I’ve never been there before,” Blair answered. 

“What time can I pick you up?” Jim asked. 

“My last patient is at five, so anytime after six?”

“I’ll be here at six tonight. Can we kiss some more before I have to leave?” Jim asked. 

“No, or I’ll never get back to my patients. I want us to go slow, Jim. Please?”

“Okay, Blair, slow is what you’re going to get. I’ll pick you up at six. Do you want me to come up and pick you up at the door?” 

“Yeah, that would be nice. We could ride the elevator down together. That sounds cool. 

“I’ll see you tonight at six. I really like you, Blair.” Jim said as he kissed Blair goodbye. 

Blair watched Jim leave and was saddened by his reluctance to let Jim get closer to him. But Blair wanted them to be just right before they had sex. Too many times he had jumped into bed with a person and then they didn’t like Blair after that. Blair didn’t want to make any mistakes this time. 

Blair’s cell when off and he answered it, “Dr. Sandburg?”

“Blair, I forgot to tell you, wear a suit tonight. It’s a really fancy Thai place. I’ll see you at six. Bye.”

Blair couldn’t wait for his day to be over so he could go out. It had been a long, long while since he had dated a nice man. And before that it was unbalanced Susan. So he was ready for some nice relaxing fun. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair went back into his office and buzzed Jessica. “Jess, is Charlie here yet?”

“He just walked in,” Jess answered. 

“Bring him on in,” Blair said. 

Jess opened the door and said, “Dr. Sandburg, Charlie is here.”

Charlie walked in and looked sickly again. Blair knew he wasn’t doing well at all. 

“So how are you feeling?” Blair asked. 

“The doctor wants me to take Prilosec for two weeks and let him know how I feel. I just think he’s saying that to get rid of me. What do you think?” Charlie asked. 

“I think you should take it. It might help that ulcer you have. But I also think that you need to start meditating. Have you ever considered that?”

“No, I don’t know anyone that could show me how to do it,” Charlie answered. 

Blair smiled. “I would show you the beginnings of meditation and then I would like you to go to a class for it. A friend of mine has numerous ulcer patients in her class and they are off meds now. They rely only on meditation. Would you like to sign up for it?”

“That would be great. Could you show me how it works?” 

“Sit down on the floor and do exactly what I do. Then we’re going to clear our minds and relax. You don’t do that much, Charlie, so this isn’t going to be easy for you. But then you’ll do breathing exercises and before long you’ll be meditating with the rest of the class.”

Blair showed him what to do, how to do it and signed him up for the class. He told him where it would be and what time and Blair felt better about Charlie immediately. Blair just knew Charlie would do better in that class. He just needed to relax and breathe deep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim got home and couldn’t wait for that night to start. He picked out his favorite suit, a gray one, which was really nice looking. He had a blue-gray shirt that went with it and a tie that had blue and gray stripes on it. His good shoes were polished to perfection, he had learned that in the service and he was going to be ready to rock Blair’s world. 

Jim went shopping next and got flowers, Boutonnieres for both of them, chocolates and a beautiful plant for Blair’s office. Jim was going to woo him and that’s all there was to it. When he picked Blair up that night, he was going to take him the 2 dozen roses he got and the vase too. Jim picked out a gorgeous cut crystal vase. Then he could have the roses for his apartment and the Boutonnieres would be for dinner and the plant would be for his office. The candy would be for just because Blair had a sweet tooth. He told Jim he loved chocolate. 

Jim had made the reservations and knew that was all taken care of. There wasn’t much left to do. He knew he didn’t need condoms or anything like that because Blair wanted to wait to have sex. So damn it, Jim was going to be strong. If Blair could wait, so could Jim. 

&&&&&&&&&&

The phone rang at about 3:00 and Jim answered, “Ellison.”

“Jimbo, we have a new case tomorrow morning, it just came in tonight. I know you’re probably busy, so I’ll start working it and you can help me in the morning,” Connor said. 

“What is the case?”

“It’s a wife gone missing and everyone thinks it’s the husband, they aren’t looking anywhere else. I don’t get that vibe from him at all. I think he’s totally innocent and I want you to read him tomorrow. So the earlier you show up tomorrow, the better,” Connor said. 

“How late is this man going to be there tonight? I could stop after my date with Blair and check him out,” Jim suggested. 

“He’s going to be here most of the night. That would be superb.” Megan said. 

“We’re having our first date tonight and then he can come to the station with me afterwards, if you don’t mind. Tell me more about this case,” Jim asked. 

“Well, as far as we know, no one saw anyone near the house that day. Not the husband, not anyone. But there has to be someone that saw someone on the street that day. It could be something simple like a delivery truck of some type. Am I right?”

“You’re right. We’ll go tomorrow and ask different questions of all of the neighbors. Maybe they’re looking for something odd, when it could be something simple. Grocery delivery, water delivery, newspaper delivery, mail delivery or UPS for Gods sake. There are a lot of things to think about and we’ll give all of them a bunch to think about tomorrow. We’ll get started at 8:00. I’ll be there at 7:00 if you want to get started early,” Jim offered. 

“Okay, we’ll see you tonight and then we’ll get started tomorrow on the neighbors. Hell, Jim, it could be one of the neighbors,” Megan said all disgusted. 

“Yes, it could. We’ll find out tomorrow. See you tonight to question the husband. I think you know if he’s guilty or not, so I’m leaning towards not guilty just because you didn’t feel anything when you picked him up. This is going to be a good case, I can tell,” Jim said. 

“I better go get some paperwork done. See you tonight,” Connor said. 

Jim was very pleased being Connor’s partner. She was good at her job and she worked harder then anyone else. She was always trying to make someone notice her. Jim knew it was because she was a woman. But he had seen Connor kick ass before, so he never worried about how good of a cop she was. But Jim was sure that she got razzed by someone now and then. Jim realized he forgot all about Joel. He didn’t even ask how he was. He wasn’t a very thoughtful friend sometimes. 

He dialed Connor’s number back and she said, “Connor.”

“Hey, I forgot to ask how Joel is doing,” Jim said. 

“Joel is fine, Jim. We’re going to sneak out for some dinner ourselves later. Maybe. This is a big case. The wife is related to the commissioner. Geeze Louise we’re never going to be able to leave,” Connor said laughing. 

“Talk to you later, Connor.”

&&&&&&&&&&&

Jim sat down to read and fell asleep on the sofa. He couldn’t believe when he woke up and it was almost five o’clock. He jumped in the shower super speed ahead and got done and dressed and ready to go by 5:45. When he arrived at the parking lot at Blair’s building he got out, carrying his vase with the roses, his two Boutonnieres, the plant and the candy. He had no hands to push buttons with so he had to use his elbow to push the elevator buttons and go upstairs. When he got to Blair’s apartment door, he kicked the door instead of knocking because he had no hands. 

Blair opened the door and burst out laughing. “Geeze, Jim, you could have gotten one thing. Although I really love roses and chocolates are my favorite sweet dessert. Blair grabbed the vase with the roses and put it on his coffee table. Then he grabbed the plant and said, “For my office?”

“Yeah, I thought it would look nice in there.” Jim said. 

“You’re absolutely right. It’ll look great. And the chocolates are wonderful. We’ll have some tonight after dinner, how does that sound?” Blair asked. 

“It sounds great to me. I love chocolate too.”

Jim then took out one of the Boutonnieres and put it in Blair’s lapel. Then Blair did the same thing with the other boutonniere and they looked like a million bucks. 

“Do you mind going to the station after dinner for just a short while. I need to read someone and Connor thinks he’ll still be there by the time we’re done.”

“Sure, that’s fine. I’d sort of like to see you in action anyway,” Blair replied. 

Jim drove them to the restaurant and opened the door for Blair both times. Blair was really enjoying this special treatment. He liked being wooed. The Thai food was just as promised, excellent. Blair couldn’t seem to eat enough. He kept taking things off Jim’s plate too. Jim would laugh and pretend to smack his hand. They were having a wonderful time, but finally Blair said, “We should go so you don’t make that man wait too long at the station.”

Jim paid for dinner, opened the door up for Blair again and they were off to the station. Jim showed up in a suit and everyone that was on duty looked at him oddly. Jim didn’t care what they thought. He was happy. It had been a good date. He showed Blair a nice time and was going to let him see Jim in action too. 

Connor walked up to them and said, “He’s just about ready to leave for the night. You just made it.”

“Okay, I’ll go in and talk to him,” Jim said and didn’t even think to introduce Blair to anyone. He had one thing on his mind and that was reading this person. He walked in and looked at the file in front of him and said, “Mr. Cason?”

“Yes, I’m Mr. Cason. Do you have news about my wife?” 

“No, I’m Detective Ellison and I’m going to be working the case tomorrow. I wanted to talk to you tonight before things got cold. Do you have any idea where your wife could be for this long?”

“I’ve already answered all of these questions, Detective. I don’t know where she is. I just know that someone took her. The house was a mess, something it never is and you could tell she put up a fight. Things were broken all over the living room and dining room. 

Jim brought the dial up and was listening to Mr. Ben Cason. _‘God, they are never going to find her at this rate. Someone has her and they think it’s me. They will never find her and I’ll get blamed for it.’_

“Mr. Cason, tomorrow we’re going to start questioning the neighbors again to see if there was anyone in the neighborhood today. We think someone might have seen something that could help us find Mrs. Cason,” Jim said calmly. 

“You believe me, don’t you? Oh my God, someone believes me. Even her mother didn’t believe me. I’ve never hurt my wife in my life and I never will. She’s an angel. I don’t know why anyone would have tried to take her away. But she put up a good fight. I keep telling everyone, she’s a fighter. So I believe that she’s still alive,” Mr. Cason said. 

“I want you to go to a hotel and spend the night. Then go to the house in the morning and we’ll see you there. We’ll find her, I swear we will,” Jim assured Mr. Cason. 

“Thank you for believing me. You’re the only one. And the woman Detective, I think she believed me too. Thank you both,” Mr. Cason said as he started to leave the room. Jim handed him a business card and said, “If you think of anything during the night call me and tell me.”

“Thank you,” Mr. Cason said as he walked down the hallway, looking defeated and sad. 

Jim walked out and said, “Oh shit, Blair, I forgot to introduce you to everyone.”

“It’s okay. Megan, introduced me and guess what? Megan has a name for me. It’s a nickname. I’ve never had one. Now I do,” Blair was being sarcastic, but not overly. 

Jim glared at Megan and said, “What are you calling him?”

“Well, his name is Sandburg, so I’m calling him Sandy. I can just tell we’re going to be the best of friends anyway, so why not have a nickname for him. I think it’s cute. He blushes when I call him that,” Connor teased. 

“Well Connor I’ll see you in the morning. Early. We need to find this woman and fast.”

“Night everyone,” Blair called out as they were leaving. 

“Night Sandy, it was so great meeting you. Have a nice night,” Connor said. 

Jim and Blair went down to the parking garage and left for the evening. 

“So he’s innocent?” Blair asked. 

“Yes, he has no idea but he knows his wife was a trooper, through it all. I liked him. And I like his wife too. I hope we find her alive.”

“I hope you do too, Jim. It would be nice to have good cases along with the bad.”

“Speaking of good cases, did I tell you about Steven and his girlfriend?” Jim asked. 

“No, you never told me anything about her,” Blair answered. 

Jim went on to explain all about her life and what had happened to her and how he already knew her and Steven still loved her after he found everything out. Jim was so proud of Steven, but he was even more proud of Pam for getting on with her life. 

“That’s incredible. I’m so glad she found someone good. And children aren’t the answer to all things. Not everyone has children and they live good happy lives,” Blair said. 

“That’s what I told my dad too. But I could tell my dad was a little disappointed in the fact that he won’t have grandchildren. But thus is life. I’m talking about grandchildren from me.”

“Why would he wonder about grandchildren from you?” Blair asked. 

“Someone at his club told him I was seen going into a gay bar. So he knew I was gay. He was disappointed about having no grandchildren. But I told him there was always adoption. Hell, we could always think of surrogate mothers as well.” 

“That’s very true. I can’t believe you already told your dad that you’re gay. Good for you, Jim Ellison.”

“That’s nothing, I told him about you, too. So he’s not going to be surprised when I bring you home to meet him,” Jim said smiling. 

“Oh goody, meeting the fam.”

Blair yawned and Jim said, “I’m going to take that as a sign. We’re both tired. I have to be to work at 7:00 tomorrow, so I need to get a good night sleep. So if it’s all right with you, I’m just going to walk you to your door and kiss you goodnight. Give me a couple days on this case and we’ll see if we can’t get something done. It doesn’t mean I won’t be thinking about you non-stop.”

“It sounds perfect to me. I love your kisses,” Blair said happily. 

Jim parked, walked Blair inside and they went upstairs to the apartment. Jim kissed Blair goodnight and watched him walk into his apartment. Then Jim walked off for the evening. He was horny, but happy. 

Jim got home and got into bed and fell asleep almost instantly. He knew 6:00 would come very early the next morning. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair put fresh water in his vase with the roses. He took his plant over to his office and watered it before he went back into his apartment. He ate some of the chocolate and thought about Jim. Jim was a good man, somewhat forgetful sometimes, but a good man. Blair could see himself easily falling in love with him. He hoped that Jim turned out to be as good as he seemed. Sometimes they weren’t and Blair was disappointed. But he had a feeling that with Jim, it might be a little different. What you see is what you get. He sure hoped so. 

Blair got ready for bed, and was out like a light. He had wonderful dreams of the wolf and the jaguar again and he enjoyed them. Nothing woke Blair up for a change. 

&&&&&&&&&&

 

Jim’s alarm went off at 5:30 and he was showered, dressed and ready to go at 6:30. He drove to work happily, because he had rested well during the night and basically he was happy. He liked his job, he liked his partner and he loved Blair. He wasn’t going to tell Blair that yet, because it might scare him away. Jim wouldn’t want to do that. He needed to play it cool and not let him know exactly how he felt all the time. 

He arrived at the station at 7:00 as planned and Connor was there in the bullpen waiting for him. 

“Good morning, Ellison.”

“Morning, Connor. How are you this fine morning?”

“I’m doing very well thank you, now can we stop being so polite? Where are we going to start today?” Connor asked. 

Jim was glad to get down to business. “We’ll start by going to the Cason house and checking out the crime scene. They’re not calling it a crime scene, but I am. I want to look around and see what’s going on.”

“Good, I have the key to the house. Mr. Cason gave it to me yesterday. We could go now, if you wanted to get an early start,” Connor suggested. 

Jim went and told Simon where they would be and that they would be gone most of the day. Then he walked to the elevator and waited for Connor to join him. They got on and rode down to the parking garage. 

“Do you mind if I drive?” Jim asked. 

“That’s fine because I rode with Joel today,” Connor said with a smile. 

They got into Jim’s SUV and Jim asked, “So I take it things are going well with the two of you?”

“There are going very well. Thank you for setting us up,” Connor said. 

“Actually you have Blair Sandburg to thank for that. It was his idea,” Jim said. 

“I’ll have to thank Sandy the next time I see him,” Connor said. 

Jim just cringed. 

There was no more talking because Jim was thinking and Connor was going over the notes from the policemen called to the scene. That was one thing Jim liked about Connor. She loved to talk, but when she was working with him, she only talked when she had to. She knew Jim didn’t get into talking as much and let there be peace and quiet sometimes. 

Jim drove into the driveway at the address that Connor had given him and looked at the house from the outside. Anyone would have been able to see anything from the street if someone would have been taken against their will. But there would have had to have been someone on the street or looking out a window to see something. 

He and Connor unlocked the door and walked in. Jim saw what the husband meant. Everything was shiny clean except for the living room and the dining room. “Did they take prints from the surfaces already?” Jim asked. 

“Let me call and ask them,” Connor answered. 

Jim continued to look around the two rooms. He saw a number of things out of place and saw a lot of fingerprints on the otherwise shiny surfaces. So Jim could tell that they didn’t do any prints yet. They needed to get that done and fast. 

Connor walked up and said, “No, they saw no reason to do fingerprinting. So I put in a call for the printing to be done now. They’ll be here in about 20 minutes. I see that there are prints all over the place. They might be hers, but they also might belong to whoever took her.”

“Thank you for taking care of that, Connor. Now let’s look in the kitchen. Jim walked in and saw what he was looking for. A calendar on the wall hung over the desk that was in the kitchen. He looked at the day she was taken and saw that she was expecting a water delivery. Connor looked at the same time and said, “It couldn’t be that easy could it?”

“No, nothing is ever that easy. Could you call that company and ask what time the delivery person came out?” Jim asked. 

Connor got right on the phone and called the company and talked to the head boss. “Yes, that would have been Van Thomas that would have delivered, but he called about an hour after he should have delivered and said he was sick and couldn’t make it to her house. He said he would deliver on another day. So he wasn’t there yesterday,” Mr. Murdock said. 

“Did he come in today?” Connor asked. 

“As a matter of fact, he called and said he would be taking the rest of the week off. He has vacation time and decided that he may as well use that as his sick time. He said he had stomach flu. Is there some something going on with Mr. Thomas?”

“No, no, don’t worry about that. But it would better if we could talk to him today. I could use his address and phone number,” Connor said. 

“Well, I don’t even know for sure you’re Detective Connor from Station 12, so why should I give you that information?” Mr. Murdock asked. 

“I can give you the station’s phone number, you can ask for my Captain. He’s there and his name is Simon Banks. He will verify my working on a case and then you could call me back,” Connor suggested. 

“If you’re willing to go through all of that, then you must be the real thing. His address is 9702 Paseo Juan Tabo. His phone number is 555-204-3431. Good luck with finding the things you need to find,” Mr. Murdock said. 

“Thank you, and goodbye,” Connor said. 

She dialed the number and got an answering machine. She didn’t leave a message. She just decided to call back later. He might have been in the bathroom or sleeping. Or he might have been off killing someone for all she knew. Connor walked in and said, “I have a feeling about this Van Thomas.”

“Did you get his address?” 

“Yes, I have both his address and his phone number. He called in sick again and said he’d be taking the week off. It just seemed odd to me. I realize that people do get sick from time to time, but the timing is just too weird. What do you think?” Connor asked. 

“I think we should wait for the printer to show up and then we can take off and go to that address you have and we’ll ask him some questions.”

At that moment, the doorbell rang and Jim opened it to two techs to get the fingerprints. “Come on in, and we’ll show you where to get the prints,” Jim said. 

Jim showed them all of the places he saw prints on shiny surfaces and then asked them to look in the kitchen and the front door also. They started their work and Jim and Connor left to go find Van Thomas and see what was up with him. 

On the way out of the house, Mr. Cason came walking up the driveway. “Did you find anything?”

Jim shook his hand and said, “Not yet, sir, but we have some leads. Let us do our job and we’ll keep in touch with you. They are inside dusting for prints right now. So please don’t get in their way. It’s important that we see if there are any good prints to use.”

“Thank you, Detective Ellison and Detective Connor. I can’t thank both of you enough for taking this seriously. Please keep me posted,” Mr. Cason said. 

Connor said, “I’ll keep the key for now, in case we need to come back, sir.”

“By all means. Find my wife, please?” Mr. Cason pleaded and both Jim and Connor smiled at him. 

&&&&&&&&&&

“We never did question any of the neighbors, should we have done that first?” Megan wondered. 

“No, we’ll go with your gut feeling first. Then we’ll back up and ask questions if it doesn’t pan out. But you usually have good first impressions about people, so there must be something wrong with this Van Thomas.”

“Thanks for believing in me,” Connor said. 

“It’s a two way street, Connor. We believe in each other. That’s the way it’s supposed to be with partners

Jim drove up to the house in question and he parked. Both of them got out and walked up to the front door. Jim turned his telepathy up. Connor knocked on the front door and waited. After a few minutes a man answered and said, “What do you want?”

“Mr. Van Thomas? I’m Detective Megan Connor and this is Detective Jim Ellison. We’d like to ask you some questions about a disappearance of one of your clients.”

_‘How could they know already?’_

“What client?” Thomas asked. 

Jim said, “Brook Cason. You were supposed to go to her house yesterday and you didn’t. We need to know where you were,” Jim said. 

Connor knew that Jim had sensed something, because he was already asking those questions.

“I don’t have to tell you anything. I was off yesterday, minding my own business. I’ve been sick for days now. If you don’t mind, I’m going back to bed,” Thomas spat out. 

Jim yanked him back out into the outer doorway and said, “We’ll take you downtown for questioning. It’s no problem to us.”

“Do you want to lock your door, Mr. Thomas?” Connor asked sweetly. 

“I don’t know why you want to talk to me. I didn’t even see her yesterday,” Thomas ranted as they shoved him in the back seat of the SUV. 

_‘Surely they don’t know about her already.’_

Jim turned to Connor and said, “Very good gut instinct.” She smiled as she got into the SUV and Jim took off down the road with Thomas ranting in the back seat. 

Connor put Van Thomas into Interrogation room 2 and locked the door. She and Jim watched him for a few moments through the two way mirror and Jim loved seeing him that nervous. 

“He has her Connor. I don’t know if she’s still alive or not. But he has her. But I didn’t sense her at his house, so he must have her somewhere else. We’ve got to find out all about him and see if he owns other property. She’s somewhere and the time is running out.”

They went in and turned on their computers and began the search. Connor said, “I’ve got it. He has a house in his mother’s name too. It’s 2224 Hamilton Blvd. Why don’t we go and check that out.”

“Let’s go see if we can get him to confess,” Jim said angrily as he walked into the interrogation room 2. 

“We found your mother’s house and we’re going to get a search warrant for that right now. Is there anything you would like to tell us before we go over there?” Jim asked. 

“She’s a bitch. She’s a stinking bitch. She constantly complained to my boss about me tracking mud into her house. She’s a clean freak and I just wanted her to realize that not everything is clean and spotless. I was teaching her a lesson. I didn’t hurt her, she’s just living a little bit differently then she’s used to,” Van Thomas confessed. 

Jim handed him the legal tablet and said, “I need it all in writing.”

Connor went and got Rafe to babysit while they left, so they could save Mrs. Cason from any more than she already had to go through. 

They drove up with four police cars and an ambulance. Jim kicked in the front door with his foot and they walked in and Jim could hear her in the basement. “She’s in the basement,” Jim hollered and headed down there. 

“How does he know she’s in the basement?” one of the cops asked. 

Connor turned around and said, “Because it’s the logical place.”

Sure enough, there was Brook Cason in a huge dog kennel. She was naked and had no water or food. She had been there for two days so she was quite ripe. Connor said, “I’ll be right back, I have to get a blanket.” 

Jim took his jacket off and at least put that over her until Connor got back with the sheet. He didn’t try and touch her in any way, not knowing what had happened to her. 

She rushed upstairs and got a sheet off the bed that wasn’t being used and rushed back downstairs to put it around Brook Cason. She unlocked her cuffs and then she pulled the tape off her mouth and she began to sob. 

Connor put the sheet around her body and helped her out of the kennel and then walked her up the stairs to see the Paramedics before they took her to the hospital. 

Connor called Mr. Cason and told him they had found his wife. She told him which hospital they would be taking her to. She also warned him of what shape she was in. Mr. Cason thanked her over and over again. He was so relieved to hear the news. 

Jim looked down at his watch and realized it was only 2:00. If they finished the paperwork early enough, he might be able to take Blair out again that night. It would all depend on what happened with this case. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim and Connor worked like crazy people to get all of the paperwork done so they could get off early. Connor wanted to take Joel out and Jim wanted to take Blair out. Jim realized they were both saps. 

At 4:00, everything was done. Van Thomas was charged, booked and all of the paperwork filed and ready. Brook Cason would be in the hospital for a few days but appeared to be doing fine. Mr. Cason was doing well now that they had found his wife. He was very happy. He liked the house spotless, so he didn’t mind her clean freak issues. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim called Blair’s office number and Jessica answered. “Dr. Sandburg’s office, may I help you?”

“Hi, Jess. It’s Jim. I wondered if you would tell Blair to call as soon as he has a chance,” Jim said sweetly. 

“Hold on, he’s without a patient right now. I’ll put you through,” Jess said. 

“Hey, Jim. How are you doing today?” Blair asked. 

“I was wondering if you would like to have dinner at my loft tonight. I make a mean beef stew and biscuits.”

“I would love to, what time?” Blair replied. 

“How is 6:30?” Jim asked. 

“I’ll be there at 6:30. I guess it would help if I had your address.”

“It’s 852 Prospect Place, number 307. See you at 6:30,” Jim said happily. 

Jim stopped at the store on the way home and bought dessert and wine. He had beer, but he decided that wine would be a nice change of pace. Since his senses were better, he would able to drink some wine too. 

Once he was home, he picked up the loft while the beef was browning and cooking away. Jim liked the beef nice and tender, so he had to cook it another hour and a half. The loft looked great, there was nothing out of place and Jim wished he had some things on his wall. His walls were so barren, that it embarrassed him for a moment. Then he realized that Blair was coming to see him, not the loft. He needed to stop worrying about such things. 

The wine was in the fridge, because Jim liked it cold and the dessert was in the oven baking. He decided on peach cobbler. He picked up French vanilla ice cream to go on top of it. The dinner was going to go well. Everything was planned properly. Jim knew that sometimes he was a little anal about things, but he wanted to impress Blair and that’s all there was to it. 

&&&&&&&&&&

_‘He probably asked me to his loft tonight so he has a better chance of getting some sex. Well, he’s in for a rude awakening. He’s not getting anything. This is going to go as planned. We’re going slow.’_

Blair showered and got dressed in blue jeans and tee shirt. He wasn’t dressing up to go over to Jim’s house. Plus Blair knew that he looked good in these jeans in particular. When his hair finally did as he wanted it to do, he left for the trip over to Jim’s place. It was sort of exciting to finally see Jim’s place. Blair wondered what type of apartment, Jim would actually have. Would it be small like Blair’s or spacious like Jim seemed to be? Blair laughed out loud at that thought. That made Jim sound huge or something. 

When he pulled up to the area to park, he was surprised. It was an old area and not at all fancy. He parked, got out of his car and walked towards the building. He looked up and saw Jim standing on the balcony smiling. He smiled back and entered the building. He got into the elevator and pushed 3 and off he went. Before long he was in front of Jim’s door and about to knock when Jim opened it and said, “Hey Chief.”

“Chief?” Blair asked, somewhat confused. 

“Yeah, I decided that you needed a real nickname. You can be my Chief in charge of all things,” Jim explained. 

“Oh man, I like that. As long as there won’t be any other Chiefs at the same time,” Blair said without even thinking. 

Jim smiled and said, “No, there will never be another Chief like you, Blair.”

“But what I meant, was, are we exclusive?” Blair asked. 

“I thought that was understood. I took it for granted. There will be no others while I’m with you. I guarantee that.”

“Good, in that case, why am I still in the hallway?”

“Geeze, I’m sorry, Chief. Come on in. This is my home,” Jim guided him in through the door and Blair was impressed. It was a vast, open loft and he loved it. 

“Wow, this is really a nice place. It’s a little sparse for my taste, but still really nice. I bet you’re comfortable here,” Blair said. 

“I’ve got some art I need to have framed for the walls. I just haven’t done it yet. Some day it’s going to look as homey and warm as yours does,” Jim confessed. 

“It smells so good in here, it isn’t even funny. Did you say we’re having beef stew? I love that,” Blair said. 

“Yes, we’re having beef stew. It’s one of the few things I know how to make well.”

“I can’t wait. I’m starving,” Blair said trying to unwind from the day. 

“Would you like a beer or a glass of wine?” Jim asked. 

“I would love an ice cold beer. I’m out at my house and after the day I had, I could use some down time,” Blair admitted. 

Jim got them both a beer and said, “Let’s sit down for a few minutes until dinner is done.”

They both drank their beer and smiled at each other. “Can I ask what happened at your office today?” Jim asked. 

“I’m going to tell you about it later, because I need your help with a patient. I don’t usually talk about her to anyone else, but things are getting out of hand and she needs help,” Blair said. 

“An abuse case, I take it. They take it for so long and try and make things better, but it never gets any better does it?” Jim asked. 

“So you’re familiar with cases like this?”

“Oh yeah, we get them all the time. It’s really hard to talk them into pressing charges though. Chances are you’ll lose her as a patient because of it. So you might want to think about that.”

“I don’t want to lose her as a patient, but this boyfriend of hers is so abusive, that I’m afraid that some day she just won’t be alive anymore. His violence keeps escalating and I fear for her very life,” Blair said sadly. 

“In that case, you don’t have much to lose. Maybe you could ask her if you could call in two friends. Connor and I could come up and tell her what we think,” Jim suggested. 

“She’s coming in tomorrow, I’ll see if she’ll see you and Connor. I hope so, because I worry more about her than any of my patients,” Blair confessed. 

“Why don’t we eat dinner and not think about work for a change,” Jim said. 

“Sounds good to me,” Blair answered. 

They went in and Jim pulled the chair out for Blair. Blair almost laughed but knew that might hurt his feelings, so just smiled instead. 

Jim brought all of the food over to the table and started dishing up Blair’s plate. 

“Whoa, that’s enough, Jim. I’m not your size,” Blair teased. 

“Are you saying that I’m fat?”

“Not hardly. I meant, big. As in tall and studly,” Blair joked. 

“All right, as long as you’re not calling me fat.”

They both started eating and Blair was the first to say, “This is delicious. I see you learned to cook somewhere.”

“It’s called being a bachelor. You either learn to cook, or you starve. Unless you want to eat at Wonderburger every night,” Jim stated. 

Blair smiled. “I even have some Wonderburger stories to tell.”

“You’ve got my attention now. You don’t strike me at the Wonderburger type,” Jim said. 

“I go when I’m depressed. Something I tell my patients not to. And then I do the opposite.”

“Hopefully you’re not depressed a lot. I happen to like it there but not all the time,” Jim said. 

They continued to eat and then Jim served dessert and they did dishes together. Jim was having a great time. So was Blair. They both really liked each other’s company. They were off to a good start. 

After they were done in the kitchen, Blair had another beer and so did Jim. They sat in the living room and talked for some time until Jim finally said, “Do I get to kiss you tonight?”

“Yes, by all means.”

Jim pulled Blair into his arms and they began to kiss like mad. They only pulled apart so they could each take deep breaths. 

Blair smiled at Jim. “Has anyone ever told you, you were a great kisser, Jim?”

“Not really. I mean, no one has complained, but no one said I was good either.”

“I think I need to get home,” Blair said. 

“Did I do something wrong?” Jim asked. 

“No, I just don’t want it to go any further tonight. This is perfect the way it is. I love this dating slow. It’s fun, it’s exciting and I look forward to every call from you.”

Jim kissed Blair one more time and said, “I love this slow dating too.” 

“I’ll call you tomorrow if I can talk my patient into seeing you. OK?” Blair asked. 

“Works for me. As far as I know we’re just doing paperwork tomorrow.”

Jim got off the sofa and walked to the door. “I’m walking you down to your car.”

“Oh you, romantic you,” Blair teased. 

They walked down the stairs holding hands and Blair loved that part of it. Jim held Blair’s hand until Blair had to open his car door. “Drive careful, Chief.”

“I will Jim. Thank you for everything. I had a tremendous time.”

“Me too, Blair, me too.”

Jim watched Blair drive off and then went back into his house. He was bummed at the prospect of sleeping alone again. But he also knew that Blair would be his soon enough. Then, they would be able to sleep together all the time. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim got to work the next day and found out that he and Connor were going to be doing paperwork all day long. Boy, they were both excited about that. Oh well, someone had to do the grunt work. 

Brown and Rafe teased them because they had an actual case to work and no paperwork, yet. Jim and Connor hated both of them and made sure and told them about it too. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair was expecting his patient that he needed to talk to about seeing Jim and Megan and he wasn’t looking forward to it at all. She was going to feel betrayed, he already knew that. She may never come to see him again, but Blair would have to live with that. 

Angela Sanchez had been seeing Blair for over a year now and he was of no help to her at all. He tried to talk her into leaving him, but she never would. Every week she would come in with more breaks, bruises or cuts and gashes. Blair was getting tired of seeing this happen to this woman who was like her name. She was an Angel. She had no family left at all and her boyfriend Kurt Dance was the only person in her life. Too bad Kurt was an asshole. 

Blair was sitting there thinking about it when Jess buzzed him. “Dr. Sandburg, its Angela.”

“Bring her right in,” Blair answered. 

Jess opened the door and announced, “Dr. Sandburg, its Angela Sanchez.”

Blair just looked at her. She had another broken wrist. Now she had two broken wrists. “Angela, my God, what happened?”

“I was just being clumsy.”

“Angela, I know it was Kurt. So if you continue to cover for him, I’m going to have to send you to a new doctor. One that can actually help you. I haven’t done a thing for you since you’ve been here. I have two police officers I would like you to see about pressing charges, but I know you won’t. So I think I had better refer you to someone better then I am.”

“I’d like to see the police officers if you know where they are. I’m tired, Blair. I’m very tired.”

“Let me call Jim and Megan right now,” Blair said as he dialed Jim’s number. 

“Ellison.”

“Jim, could you and Megan please come and talk to Angela Sanchez. She asked to speak with the two of you and she’ll be here for the next hour. Do you have time?”

Jim started getting the paperwork together right away. “I have everything she would need to sign. Tell her that we’ll be there in a moment.”

“I’ll tell Jess to bring you right back to my office when you get here,” Blair said before he hung up. 

Blair buzzed Jessica. “Yes, Blair?”

“When Jim and Megan Connor arrive, would you please bring them right in to my office?” Blair asked. 

“Certainly. I’ll watch for them,” Jess said before she broke the connection. Jess knew that it was about time that this poor girl called the police. She had something broken on her at least once a month. Jess felt much better about her and hoped things would work out. 

Blair talked with Angela until Jess brought Jim and Megan into the room. Jim had a stack of papers with him and they sat across from Angela and explained everything that they would need to press charges. Jim explained that he might become enraged, so they needed to also put out a restraining order. She needed to feel somewhat safe and until he got some help she wouldn’t feel anything but fear. Megan explained about them finding a place for her to go for abused survivors and they would do it immediately. 

Both Jim and Megan talked to her and she signed all of the papers with an X because of her wrists with Blair signing below as a witness, to have Kurt Dance arrested. She breathed her first sigh of relief in a long while. 

They left and went and arrested Kurt Dance right away. Jim had seen people like him many times. He was about Blair’s size and had a complex about being short and smaller then the other guys, so they take it all out on their small girlfriend. He was a little punk ass bitch, as far as Megan was concerned and told him as much. He never tried to hit or strike either Jim or Megan, but this was usually the case. They weren’t small enough. They only took it out on ones that were smaller and wouldn’t fight back. 

They charged him and he was booked and taken to the courthouse. Jim didn’t think they would let him out with the amount of injuries to his girlfriend. Jim figured they had plenty of time to try and get Angela a new place to stay. 

About four hours later, they were still looking. Both Jim and Megan were trying to find her a good place when Simon said, “Connor, Ellison, my office.”

“Did you arrest Kurt Dance today?” Simon asked. 

“Yes, we arrested him about four hours ago. We’re trying to find a new place for his girlfriend to move to. She needs to get out of that environment, so if you don’t mind, sir, we’d like to get finished so we can get over there and get it taken care of,” Jim said. 

“There is no need Jim. Dance was let out about two hours ago and he killed Angela Sanchez and then himself. There is nothing more you can do,” Simon stated. 

“Shit, shit, shit…” Connor said angrily as she tore out of the office. 

Jim was quieter. He knew he would have to tell Blair. “I’ve got to go and tell her psychologist what happened. He just talked her into this today.”

“Take Connor with you and see if you can’t calm her down somewhat,” Simon ordered. 

“Yes, sir.” Jim left the office and looked for Connor and heard her in the rest room. 

He knocked on the door and said, “Connor, we have to go and tell Blair about this. Do you want me to do it alone?”

“Oh God, no. He’s going to hate you enough as it is. With me there it might help. We may as well have shot her ourselves, Jim.”

“You won’t get any arguments out of me. Blair is never going to get over this. I’m telling you right now. This will be the end of me and Blair.”

“Let’s just go and tell him about her and see what happens, Jim.”

Jim and Connor got into the SUV and drove over to Blair’s office. Jess looked at them and said, “He’s in with a patient.”

“We’ll wait,” Jim said as he sat down with Connor. 

Jess came out and talked to them. “Is this about Angela?”

“We have to talk to Blair, Jess, not you. I’m sorry.”

Jess walked sadly back to her desk. She knew that Angela was dead. 

Connor could hear Jess sniffing and blowing her nose. Connor glanced at Jim and he looked stoic as ever. 

The door opened and out walked a happy patient. Jess said, “You can go right in now.”

The two of them walked in and closed the door behind them. “Hey, I didn’t expect to see you two until you had found a new place for Angela. What’s going on?”

“Chief, sit down.”

Blair sat down and knew it was bad news. 

“They let Kurt Dance out two hours ago and he killed Angela and then himself. We were in the middle of getting her a place to be safe. The courts don’t usually let someone out that quickly with that many priors. So we thought we had enough time. I’m so sorry, Blair,” Jim said sadly. 

“Oh my God. I sent her to her death. I made her choose death over living. If you don’t mind, I’d like to be alone,” Blair shouted. 

“Blair, I’m so sorry,” Megan said. 

“Sorry? You both are sorry, but that doesn’t make her any less dead. You promised her that she would be safe. You lied. You said that you would find a place that would be safe from him. You lied. You fucking lied about everything. Jim, don’t take this the wrong way, but I wouldn’t ever see you again if my life depended on it. Now get out and don’t ever come back again.”

Jim turned on his heel and walked out of the office as stoically as he could. Connor remained and said, “Blair, it wasn’t his fault. We were working our asses off to find her a place. He was trying, Blair, he was trying.”

“Get out and don’t come back again,” Blair shouted and Megan left Blair’s office. 

Megan walked past Jess and said, “I’m so sorry.”

“Tell Jim that Blair will come around. He’s in shock, I’m sure.”

“He’s not going to come around, Jessica. Be well,” Connor said as she walked out the door. 

She got downstairs and expected the SUV to be long gone, but he was parked and waiting for her. She got in and she could see he was on the verge of losing it. 

“I say we stop at a pub.”

Jim looked at her and said, “I don’t think drinking is the answer.”

“What is, Jim? Tell me that.”

“Okay, the pub it is,” Jim said as he began to drive to the nearest pub. 

Connor called Simon and said, “Ellison and I are stopping at a pub. Don’t expect us back today.”

“What pub, I’ll join you,” Simon asked. 

Connor looked at the pub they were stopped in front of and said, “Brad’s.”

“I’ll be there in about ten minutes. Try and keep him calm.” Simon hung up his phone and rushed out of the station as fast as he could. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair cancelled the rest of his appointments for the day and walked into his apartment and lay on his futon. He started crying for the loss of a really sweet woman, who should have lived past 23. Blair didn’t cry long because, crying didn’t really help. So instead, he remembered how much he hated Jim Ellison and Megan Connor. It was their fault. Blair was glad he would never have to see Jim again. He felt sadness in his heart about that, but knew that was part of life. He couldn’t be with a man that made promises he didn’t keep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Simon pulled up and parked outside of Brad’s and walked in. He found Connor and Jim in a booth in the back right away. Both of them looked like they had lost their best friend. 

“How you doing, Connor?” Simon asked. 

“How do you think, Simon?”

“Touche,” Simon answered. “Jim, is there anything I can do for you?”

“You could leave us alone. We just want to get stinking drunk and forget for a few moments. Seeing you remind us of our jobs,” Jim explained. 

“Too bad, Jim. I don’t want you two getting drunk and then killing someone on the way home. I’ll be the designated driver. Plus I’ll listen to whatever you have to let off steam about.” Simon walked to the bar and ordered a Dr. Pepper. 

He got back to the table and asked, “What are you drinking, Jim?”

“Dr. Pepper.”

“Dr. Pepper?” Simon asked. 

“I didn’t want to be drunk. But Connor does. So I’m driving. I’m just here for moral support. Then I’ll call Joel if she get’s too bad.”

“Why would you call Joel?”

Megan kicked him under the table. Jim said, “Because he’s a friend. We go out, the three of us from time to time. He might be able to reach her more easily then I do.” Jim rubbed his shin with his other leg and glared at Connor.

“Both of you did your best to find a safe place for Angela Sanchez.”

“Well, that wasn’t good enough, Simon. We should have brought her to the station with us and kept her there where we could protect her. We promised her she would be safe. We promised she would never have to face him again. And what did she face the last few minutes of her life, but the animal we made promises about. So don’t tell us we did everything we could.” Jim stared at the ceiling like there was something up there that everyone should be looking at. 

“You’re both feeling sorry for yourself. I take it something happened with the doctor. Did he mean mouth you, Jim? Did he say something that hurt your feelings? You’re a fucking cop, Ellison. You too, Connor. You have to take this shit now and then. If you won’t see the good doctor again, then so be it.”

“Fuck you, Simon. Fuck you.” Jim laid his head on the table top and just took deep breaths. 

“Jim, he’ll come around. He’s in shock, just like the two of you are. But you have to remember, he knew her well and you didn’t. You had just met her, so he’s going to take it much harder then you. Give him some time to come around. Things will work out for the best,” Simon assured him. 

Jim lifted his head and said, “I don’t think you’re right this time, Simon.”

“That would be a shame, Jim because I think the two of you would make excellent friends. Give him time.”

Jim said, “I’m never going to bother him. He won’t have to worry about seeing me again.”

“Connor, why are you so upset?” Simon asked. 

“Simon, she was such a little person. She was so sweet, delicate and gentle that you would be in love with her as soon as you met her. How she ever got with an animal like that is beyond me. She was just the opposite and such a good soul. I’m going to miss her and I only met her today.”

“I wish they would let me in the morgue so I could shoot the fucker a few times.” Jim didn’t mean to say that out loud. 

“Maybe we could work something out, Ellison,” Simon stated. 

“No… Then I would be as bad as he was. I never want to be considered an animal. Connor, I think I want to go home. I need to rest.”

“Jim, you’re not going to do anything stupid are you?” Simon asked. 

“No, Simon, I’m going to go home, feel sorry for myself for a while and then I’m going to go to bed. I’m not shooting myself or anything like that. I have paperwork to finish tomorrow,” Jim said somewhat teasingly and somewhat seriously. 

“Okay, I’ll take Connor home,” Simon assured Jim. 

“Thanks. See you both tomorrow. Connor, sleep well, if you can,” Jim said as he headed for the door. “Bye Simon.”

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair was sleeping and he was in the blue jungle. Suddenly he saw the jaguar jump in front of a rifle and was killed. The wolf was upset about it. He howled to the moon and let the world know that someone was taken from him. 

Blair woke up from his dream and wondered why he was dreaming that. Was Jim going to hurt himself tonight? Would Jim do that? Would he stand in front of a bullet for no reason? Blair got off the futon and wondered what he should do. 

He picked up his phone and called Jim’s cell phone. It went right to voice mail, which wasn’t a good sign. Then he called the house. He heard the answering machine go off and he said, “Jim, its Blair. I need to talk to you about something important. Call me no matter what time it is.”

Jim got out of the shower and saw the light blinking on the phone. He listened and wondered why Blair would be calling him. He had no reason to. And Jim had no right to call him back. He would just cause heartache and pain. Why do that to Blair? 

He walked upstairs and got into his bed. The more he laid there the more he thought about what Blair was calling for. What if something was wrong with Blair? What if he needed Jim’s help and Jim didn’t call back?

Jim picked up his cell and called Blair’s number. “Dr. Sandburg’s answering service, can I help you?”

“He just called me and I was returning his call. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you. I’ll call him tomorrow.” Jim hung up the phone and walked downstairs. Where did Blair call him from?

“Jim went downstairs and hit redial for the caller ID. The phone rang twice and Blair said, “Jim?”

“Blair, why did your answering service answer your other line?”

“I took a week off. All of my calls are going to another doctor.”

“Why did you call me?” Jim asked point blank. 

“I had a horrible dream that you, as the jaguar died and I wanted to be sure you were all right.”

“Yeah, I’m dandy. Now that you know that, you can rest easily. Goodbye.”

“Jim, wait.”

“What?”

“Are you thinking about eating a bullet?” 

Jim laughed and said, “You don’t know me at all. I’ve been through so much shit and you think I’m going to eat a bullet because of this? Do you think this is the first time I’ve lost someone due to my job? So there is no need to worry about **me.** Go back to sleep. Goodnight.”

Jim hung up the phone and Blair just stared at it. Why was Jim so pissed off at him? He should be more pissed off at Jim, not the other way around. Wasn’t it Jim’s fault that Angela was dead? Who else could be to blame? Was Jim blaming him? 

Blair thought about it for a moment and realized that this was completely weird. Jim was angry with Blair and didn’t want to talk to him. Just like Blair had wanted, but yet, Blair wanted to talk to him now. So what was going on? Was Jim playing a game? Jim seemed to have turned the tables. 

Blair didn’t know what to do. He told Jim he never wanted to see him again, but yet, Blair wanted to get dressed and drive over there right now. Was Jim doing this on purpose, to try to get Blair to forgive him? Jim never reminded Blair of a manipulator, but he could be wrong. 

Blair straightened up his clothing from sleeping and took the elevator downstairs to his car. He was going to see Jim and find out why Jim was so angry with him. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim tossed and turned and realized he wasn’t going to sleep that night. He shouldn’t have yelled at Blair. It wasn’t Blair’s fault that things happened like they did. It was no ones fault. So he had to stop blaming himself and Blair. 

He walked down the stairs and got a beer out. Then he grabbed his deck of cards and decided he was going to play solitaire. Maybe he could play until he was exhausted and then sleep. 

Jim began to play and was really getting into the idea of winning more then one game out of twenty. 

When the knock on the door hit, Jim jumped. He hadn’t been listening. He had his senses turned down. He turned them up and sensed it was Blair. 

He ran upstairs and got a pair of jeans on and a tee shirt. He didn’t want to meet Blair in his underwear. 

He opened up the door and Blair said, “Why did you hang up on me?”

“Blair, you said you didn’t want to talk to me again or see me again. I thought I was doing you a favor.”

Blair hugged Jim’s body close to his own and Jim could feel the tremors in Blair’s. Jim just stood there holding on to Blair and didn’t say a word. He didn’t want to ruin this moment. 

Finally Jim said, “Do you want to come in and talk to me?”

“Yes, that would be nice,” Blair answered. 

Jim pushed Blair down onto the sofa and sat next to him. “I have to tell you, Blair, I’m confused. I’m so fucking confused, I don’t even know what to say.”

“You think you’re confused, how do you think **I** feel?” 

“Blair, you’re a doctor. You know how to feel, I’m a cop, I don’t. So excuse me for being more confused.” 

“You sound so angry with me, Jim. Why?”

“It wasn’t anyone’s fault Blair. I tried to blame myself and Connor but that didn’t work. Then I tried to blame you for suggesting it and that didn’t work either. So I’m just angry at the world. Not at you, but the world. She shouldn’t have died. She was an angel and should have been able to live past 23 without a care in the world. Life is sometimes so fucking unfair it isn’t even funny.”

“I was just thinking about the same thing tonight. That she was only 23 and she should have had more years. Life **is** very unfair. I agree with you,” Blair admitted. 

“I talked to Simon tonight and he pointed out something very wise. He said that you would take it the hardest because you were her doctor. You knew her inside and out and you were very close to her. Of course this is going to be hard for you. And you had every right to say what you did to me and Connor. We weren’t fast enough. We tried, but we failed. I just want you to know that I understand your anger and your loss,” Jim explained. 

“Thank you, Jim. I’m glad you understand, but that was no excuse for the way I treated you. I took out my loss and anger on you and Connor, like a lay person would. I wasn’t acting one bit like a doctor would. I think I was too attached to Angela and that was part of the problem. Her boyfriend told her that I had a thing for her. Well, I didn’t, but I loved her in my own way and I don’t love all of my patients. So I have to apologize to both you and Connor. I had no right to treat either of you as badly as I did. There is simply no excuse at all. I can only ask that you will forgive me and we can start over again.”

Jim looked at Blair somewhat perplexed and said, “We’re still going to be dating?”

“If you forgive me,” Blair answered. 

“I forgive you. I hope you’ll forgive me too. It’s something we both have to live with, Blair. It’s not a fun thing to lose someone you love, so I’m here if you need me for anything.”

Blair went into Jim’s arms and said, “I’m so fucking sorry for what I said to you.”

“Blair, we’re going to start over, remember? So there is nothing to say you’re sorry about. So I don’t want to hear it again.”

Blair just stayed in Jim’s arms and Jim finally realized that Blair had fallen asleep in his arms. Normally Jim would love this idea, but he was going to have to put him on the sofa for tonight. 

Jim laid Blair down on the sofa and went in to get a sheet and a blanket and a pillow. He got him all set up for sleeping and shut the lights out except over the stove, so that Blair would know where he was at if he woke in the middle of the night. 

Jim went upstairs and told his dick to settle down, he was getting none of that and finally fell asleep. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Jim woke up at 7:00, Blair was already gone. Jim hadn’t even heard him leave he was so tired. Oh well, maybe he would hear from him again. 

Jim walked down the stairs and saw a note on the counter. He opened it and read what it said, 

_Jim,_

_Thank you so much for last night. You could have taken advantage of me easily and you didn’t. You’re a very good man. I’m not sure, but I think I’m falling in love with you and I thought I should warn you in case this idea scares you at all._

_I would like to take you out to dinner this week sometime. Your choice for the restaurant and I thought it would be nice if we went to a movie. Maybe you would like to ask Joel and Connor. I need to talk to her anyhow. There is a note for her from me on the counter underneath this one. Could you please give it to her for me? I gave her my number, and I’m hoping she’ll call me back._

_Thank you again for being so understanding. I have to confess something. I snuck up the stairs and watched you sleep for a few moments this morning. You are angelic when sleeping, Jim Ellison. Some day I’m going to look forward to being able to watch you all the time._

_Call me today and tell me about the double date or single date. Whatever you decide on._

_Love,_

_Blair_

Jim just smiled as he read the note. So Blair was falling in love with Jim. Cool. Jim didn’t know if he was going to tell Blair that he’s been in love with him since the dreams. He might seem too desperate. 

Jim got ready for work, put the note for Connor in his pocket and left. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Jim got there he saw Connor sitting at her desk looking a little green around the gills. Jim walked up and said, “I was asked to give you this.”

Jim sat down at his desk, watching Connor to see how she was taking the note. She was now blowing her nose and wiping her eyes, so Blair must have said some mushy things to her. It must have worked, because she picked up her phone and called Blair. 

Jim stopped listening and started work on some of his old files he had to get caught up on. Megan walked up to him and said, “Can I see you in room 1?”

Jim got up and followed her into room 1 and sat down. Connor shut the door and said, “He is a wonderful man. Simon was right. We just had to give him time. He told me he’s in love with you. I was thrilled and I knew you were too. Then he mentioned that you still hadn’t slept together and I was perplexed about that. What is wrong with you, Jimbo? Fuck that man’s brains out.”

“Well, first of all, he would like to do me and I’m taking my time because I’ve never had that done to me before. It’s growing on me now. It’s Blair. I know he wouldn’t hurt me or treat me badly, so I’m getting over it. But we need to take our time. We’re not in a rush,” Jim confessed. 

“Oh wow, so that’s virgin territory. I’m surprised he didn’t fuck you first thing when he found out,” Connor teased. 

“Seriously, Megan, he’s a great guy and I want to go slow, so that we’re sure of each other. I want to be able to take him to my dad’s house when I feel good about it and I want him to feel good about going there. I’m not sure how I feel about his mother.”

“What’s wrong with his mum?” 

“Nothing, just an odd duck, I think. She still calls cops, pigs. Blair told me about that one night. She’ll be thrilled about Blair’s choice in boyfriend.”

Connor laughed and said, “Pigs. I love it. The jokes she’ll make with you in the room. This ought to be fun. He asked if we could double date one night and I told him yes. So whatever night you want to go, we’re going to double. Joel will be thrilled about meeting a new person. You know how Joel is.”

“How about tonight? Would that be too soon?” Jim asked. 

“Not for us. We don’t have a thing planned. Unless something comes up here, it’s not a problem for us.”

“Okay, where should we go to dinner?” Jim asked. 

“Let’s try something new and different. How about Sullivan’s Steakhouse? I heard that they have the best steaks. Have you been there?” Connor wondered. 

“I love Sullivan’s Steakhouse. Good idea. I’ll make the reservations now. You call and tell Joel we’re on for 7:00. Talk to you later,” Jim said as he left the room. 

Jim sat at his desk and called Blair’s office. Blair answered and said, “Hi.”

“That caller ID is a wonderful thing isn’t it?” Jim asked. 

“Yes, it is. Are we going tonight?” 

“Tonight it is. Sullivan’s Steakhouse, if that’s all right with you. We’re going to meet there at 7:00. No movie, because I think it will take long enough for just dinner, drinks and talking. I’ll be the designated driver,” Jim suggested. 

“Oh no you won’t. I’m driving. I asked you out, remember? So we’re going in my Buick. Don’t make a fuss, or I’ll tease you. I’ll pick you up at the loft at 6:30 and we’ll have plenty of time to get there. See you tonight. Bye.”

“Bye,” Jim said. He hated hanging up, Blair sounded so good that it was almost unreal. 

&&&&&&&&&&

That night at 6:30, Jim was ready and downstairs waiting when Blair drove up in his car. Jim did like Blair’s car, he just didn’t like anyone else driving but him. Jim was a control freak, simple as that. 

Blair got out of his car and came around and Jim thought he was going to open the door for him and Blair said, “You’re driving. I know it’s a control thing with you. But I like to take my car now and then, even if I don’t drive it.” Then Blair kissed Jim and got into the passenger side. Jim smiled all the way over to the driver’s side. When he got in, he noticed Blair had already moved the seat back to fit his long legs. 

“I love you too,” Jim blurted out. 

“Oh my God, you read my mind?” Blair asked. 

“No, I meant, because you moved the seat back for me so I didn’t hit my knee on the steering wheel, you must love me. So that’s why I said, I love you too.”

“I was just thinking that. Have you ever fallen in love with someone that you had never even slept with before?” Blair asked. 

“Nope, can’t say as I have. I’m usually a slut. So this is all new to me. It’s fun, I think.” Jim admitted. 

“Good, so you’re not all mad at me for holding out,” Blair teased. 

“Not at all,” Jim answered. 

They talked about a little bit of everything as Jim drove over to Sullivan’s Steakhouse. They parked in the parking lot and walked into the establishment and told them their name. 

Connor and Joel came from around the other side. “Sandy, you look wonderful. This is my friend Joel. Joel, this is Sandy, aka Blair Sandburg. He is Jim’s better half.”

Joel stuck his hand out and said, “Blair, it’s wonderful to meet you.”

“Why thank you, Joel. I’ve heard nothing but good things about you. But I did hear that you might be getting tickets for the Jags and I couldn’t believe I wasn’t invited.” Blair teased. 

“I’ll have you know that Megan is a smart woman, she knew there might be someone in Jim’s life, so she ordered an extra ticket. So Jim doesn’t even know we had it. We figured we would tell you tonight. We were hoping that you liked the Jags,” Joel said. 

“Who wouldn’t be a Jags fan?” Jim said laughing. “Chief, we’re going to see our first Jags game together.” 

Joel asked, “Why are you calling him Chief?”

Jim laughed and said, “Another nickname for Blair. I like it. He doesn’t seem to mind either.”

Joel looked over at Blair and smiled. “I’m going to call you Blair, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind at all. If I don’t answer, you’ll understand why, though. With all of these nicknames, I don’t know what to answer to,” Blair joked. 

The waiter came around and took them all to their table. Well, it was a booth, a very cozy booth. Jim really liked sitting that close to Blair. 

They ordered drinks, non-alcoholic ones and looked at the menu to see what they wanted. They all decided on Filet Mignon and they all ate it medium rare. Blair thought that was not so much peculiar, as interesting. 

Once he brought the drinks, they ordered appetizers and then ordered their meals. Connor was talking non-stop. Once Joel kissed her just so someone else would have a chance to say something. 

“I’m sorry, everyone, I’m a little keyed up tonight. Joel has asked me to move in with him. Do you believe it? I’m so excited.” Megan confessed. 

Jim said, “Joel, could I talk to you outside for a moment?”

They walked out to the parking lot and Blair and Connor wondered what was going on. 

“Why would he take Joel out to the parking lot, Sandy?” Megan asked. 

“I don’t have a clue. You’ll have to wait and see what they say when they come in. I’m sure it’s nothing bad,” Blair assured her. 

They both watched as the two men talked in the parking lot. 

“Joel, that’s the house that your wife lived in. How do you think that will make Connor feel?”

“I never really thought about it. My wife has been gone for ten years, Jim. I think the house is safe.”

“It’s not a matter of being safe, Joel. It might bring up bad memories for you. Have you had her over to your place yet?” Jim asked. 

“No, I haven’t. She hasn’t really even seen the house yet. Do you think I should sell it and we should buy one together?” Joel wondered. 

“That would be good. She would love to help you find a house.”

“I’ll put my house up tomorrow. Thank you, Jim. This never even occurred to me.” Joel hugged Jim and they walked into the place smiling. 

“Well, they seem happy. What in the hell was it about?” Connor asked. 

“I have no idea. I know less then you do about them.”

The two men slid back into the booth and Joel said, “So did you miss us?”

“I want to know what you were doing with Jim in the parking lot,” Connor asked. 

Both Jim and Joel laughed out loud. “Jim was pointing out to me that I need to sell my old house, and you and I can look for a new one.”

“Oh you’re kidding. We’re going to look and get a house together?” Connor asked excitedly. 

“Yup, that’s what we’re going to do. So it’s not going to be tomorrow that you’re moving in. I have to sell my house first and then we can start looking. Is that all right?” Joel asked. 

“It’s perfect, Joel. Thank you. And thank you, Jim for helping him decide that. You two men are the best. Oh you too, Sandy.” Connor said happily. 

Dinner was wonderful. The meal was great, the conversation was even better and before long Blair yawned. 

“Oops, I didn’t mean to do that everyone. I’ve been up since five today. It’s been a long one,” Blair confessed. 

Jim said, “We’ll go now. It’s time you get some rest.” The bill had already been taken care of by Joel and Blair, so it was time to go. 

“Thank you so much for the double date, Blair,” Joel said. 

“You are most welcome, Joel. I really like you and Megan, so I hope we have many more.”

“Well, I’m game anytime anyone wants to come back here. My steak was awesome,” Jim said. 

Joel said, “And don’t forget about the game we have planned. We’ll go out after the game too.”

Blair smiled. “Sounds good to me.”

Jim and Blair both kissed Connor on the cheek and hugged Joel. Then they walked out to the parking lot. Jim unlocked Blair’s side first and opened the door for him and then got in himself. 

Jim didn’t say anything for the longest time and Blair finally broke the silence. “Jim, I would like to stay over tonight. Is that possible?”

Jim almost swerved into another car in the opposite lane. “Sorry… That took me off guard. We had just talked about going super slow and now you’re asking to spend the night. What’s up?”

“I want to fuck you so bad, it isn’t even funny,” Blair confessed. 

“Then that’s what we’ll do,” Jim answered. He was a nervous wreck, but he hoped that Blair didn’t notice. 

They got to Jim’s house and got out and walked up the stairs, holding hands. 

“Can we be out? I mean, will you tell people about us?” Blair asked. 

“Yes, I intend to tell my dad this weekend or next when I take you over with me on either Sunday. If you want to go anyway,” Jim said. 

“I would love to go, Jim. Let me make sure I don’t have any plans with Jess either day. I’ll let you know,” Blair answered. 

They walked into Jim’s loft and Jim said, “I need to get cleaned up, if you know what I mean?”

“Okay, I’ll be waiting upstairs for you,” Blair said as he climbed the stairs slowly watching Jim’s butt as he walked into the bathroom. Blair had already cleaned himself in case Jim wanted to do him. 

Jim gave himself an enema so that he would be clean for Blair. Then he shaved once again, so he would give no razor burn. When he walked out, he had only his boxers on. 

Blair was lying naked on the bed when Jim got up there and Jim smiled. “You’re nothing like the dreams I had. You’re so much **more**.”

“Come here, babe,” Blair said as he called Jim over. Jim took his boxers off and slid into the bed next to Blair. 

“Now don’t even tell me that no one has said what a nice cock you have,” Blair said smiling. 

“No, again, no one has ever complained, but they never said I had a nice cock.”

Blair went immediately in between Jim’s legs and took his cock into his mouth. Blair was born to suck cock. It wasn’t long and Jim was ready to come. Blair stopped and said, “Oh no, you don’t. You’re going to fuck me as soon as I get done fucking you.”

Blair pulled the drawer open and saw the astroglide and put some on his fingers. He began to loosen Jim up slowly. Jim was really digging it big time. He didn’t think he would like a finger up his ass, but he was wrong. Who knew?

Blair had him plenty loose and put a condom on himself and then astroglide on that and slid inside Jim. Jim about came off the bed when he felt it. 

“Jim, turn down your senses. You might have them up too high,” Blair suggested. 

Blair could tell that Jim did just that and he was much more relaxed that time when Blair thrust slowly and deeply into him. 

Jim was arching up to meet each of Blair’s hard thrusts. Jim was ready to come from this alone. He said, “Blair, I think I might need to come.”

“No, wait for me. I want you to fuck me.” Blair hurried and fucked Jim harder then he had expected to and threw his head back howling like the animal in his dreams. 

Blair noticed that Jim had wipes in the drawer, so he cleaned off both of them and then lay down on the bed next to Jim. “Your turn, big guy.”

Jim got the astroglide out and began to do exactly what Blair had done. The only difference was, he was kissing Blair like crazy. It was driving Blair wild and Jim loved that he was able to do that to his Guide. _Where did that come from? This was the first time, he had ever thought about who his Guide would be._

He got a condom on, slid into Blair’s warm, inviting hole and began to fuck Blair almost as fast as Blair had done Jim. It wasn’t long for Jim either. Blair was so ready for this and he was so attuned to Jim he knew just when to move and just when to moan. Moaning was a good thing when it came to Jim. That always turned him on more than anything else. Each moan brought him closer and closer. 

Jim’s climax was coming to a head. _God, now you’re making sex jokes while fucking Blair._ Jim hit Blair’s prostate two more times and both of the men came with a growl and a howl. Jim waited until he started slipping out of Blair and then he cleaned them both off. 

“Guess what? Jim asked. 

“What?”

“I thought about how wonderful it was fucking my Guide. It’s the first time I’ve ever thought about you being my Guide. I thought it was worth mentioning.”

“Well, then I’ll tell you that I kept wondering if all Sentinels fuck this way, or just mine.” Blair looked over at Jim and smiled. 

“That’s so great. We’re a matched pair. I love that. I love you,” Jim said as he kissed his Guide once again. 

“And I love you. Can we sleep now?” Blair asked hopefully. 

“We sure can. We’ll shower in the morning,” Jim said. 

“Goodnight, Jim.”

“Goodnight, Blair.”

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim and Blair woke up at the same time and Blair said, “How about sex in the shower?”

“Sounds good to me. I happen to love sex, so this works,” Jim replied. 

“Can I ask you something first?” Blair asked

“You can ask me anything. Shoot,” Jim said. 

“Are you doing all right without a doctor? Do you feel the need to see one at all?”

“I’ve got Sean Gabriel’s number if I need him. But I’m doing fairly well. No sensory spikes, no zones, no problems. So I’m saving him for when I really need him. Don’t worry about me, okay?” Jim asked. 

“Okay, if you say you’re all right, then I’m going to believe you.”

They went downstairs and had a wonderful shower and fantastic hand jobs done by both. 

As they were dressing, Jim put his shoulder harness on with the gun and Blair stepped back a little bit. Jim noticed and said, “Are you afraid of guns?”

“Let’s just say I have a healthy respect for them. I stay away from them and hopefully they’ll stay away from me,” Blair said. 

“If I got you a gun and took you to the gun club, would you learn to shoot and keep your gun here in my safe?” Jim asked. 

“If this is something you feel strongly about, then I’ll do it,” Blair replied. 

“I do feel strongly about it. I want you to live with me one of these days and I’m gone sometimes and I’d like to think that you could protect yourself without me being here.”

“Okay, set up the sessions. Anything at night works for me,” Blair said. 

“Have I mentioned I love you? And how do you feel about moving in with me?” Jim asked nervously. 

“Actually I would love to, but I think we should wait a while longer. Maybe two weeks?” Blair asked. 

“I thought you meant like two years. Two weeks sounds easy, breezy,” Jim said. 

“I’m going to tell my mom about us. I hope you don’t mind,” Blair mentioned. 

“That’s fine with me. I can’t wait to meet this woman of mystery,” Jim said smiling. 

“You’ll change your tune, once you meet her.”

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair left for work and Jim left in his own SUV and drove to the gun club by the station. It was called Bellevue Gun Club. He liked it there because it was mostly cops that came around and he didn’t have to talk to anyone if he didn’t want to. 

They sold guns there, so Jim bought a really nice one for Blair and asked them to keep it there until they showed up for target practice. They were glad to do it. Jim was a good customer after all. Jim also paid for a year membership for Blair and set up the rental booths for that week. He also paid for the paper targets, because with Blair being new, he was going to go through a lot of them. 

Once he was done, he went to work. While he was there he called his mother in Seattle. 

“Hello?” A nice strong voice answered. 

“Grace Phillips?” Jim asked. 

“Yes, who is this?” she asked. 

“This is your son, Jimmy. Dad told me where you were and I wondered if I could talk to you,” Jim started. 

“Jimmy, that’s the past and I don’t live in the past anymore. I have a new life and I don’t want my old life back. I have three wonderful children with a fantastic husband, everything is perfect. I don’t wish to see you or your brother.”

Jim didn’t know what to say. Steven didn’t even rate high enough to be called by his name. “Well, I guess I’ll just say goodbye then,” Jim finished. 

“Goodbye, have a good life,” Grace said before she hung up the phone. 

Jim just sat there on the verge of losing it. Rafe came by and said, “Hey Jim could you come with me for a moment?”

Jim followed Rafe into room 3 and Rafe shut the door. “What’s going on, man?”

Jim didn’t say anything he just shook his head. 

Something is upsetting you and you can’t talk about it, right? Was it Blair?” Rafe asked. 

“No, it wasn’t Blair. I called my mother. She never wants to see me again. She left when I was ten and she never wants to see me. I wanted to see her something fierce. I have no idea why, but I did. Now I have no choice. She said to stay out of her life. She doesn’t live in the past anymore and I’m part of the past.”

Rafe hugged Jim and just held him close to him for a few moments. “It’ll get easier as time goes on, Jim. We always want our parents to like us and want to be near us, but it doesn’t always work that way does it?”

“Thanks for the support, Rafe. I need to get back to work. I’ll talk to you later on. Thank you again,” Jim said as he walked out of the room. Jim felt somewhat embarrassed that he had lost control of himself while talking to Rafe. He didn’t realize that Rafe felt really close to Jim and would have done anything for him at that moment. Jim had to learn to open up to people and feel more comfortable with feelings. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair called his mother from his office and actually got a hold of her in Colorado.

“Hey Sweetie, it’s so good of you to call. I heard that Susan had a breakdown. I was sad to hear that. I guess you did know best. Anyway I’m sorry that I gave you such a hard time about her,” Naomi said. 

“The next time, I give my opinion of someone being off their rocker, maybe you’ll listen to me. I wanted to call and tell you that I met someone and we’ve been dating awhile and I really, really love this man. He’s so nice and he’s so good to me. You’re going to love him. His name is Jim Ellison. I’m moving in to his place in two weeks and I wanted to let you know in case you came up to my apartment. I won’t be here after that. I’m just keeping it for naps and things like that. So what do you think of my news?”

Naomi was quiet for a moment and then she said, “I’ll be there tomorrow to meet him. I have to see this man that has my son’s heart going pitter pat. What does he do for a living? Another doctor?” Naomi asked hopefully. 

“Well this part is sort of funny, Naomi. He’s a cop. A really good cop too.”

“A pig? How many times did I ask you to not get involved with a pig? I can’t believe this is happening. Now I know I’m coming tomorrow. I’m going to put my foot down, Blair,” Naomi shouted. 

“Naomi, I don’t care what you say, I’m not giving him up. He’s mine and I’m his. We’re a matching pair. Nothing you can say will break us up,” Blair shouted back. 

“I’ll be there tomorrow sometime. Keep your phone on,” Naomi said before she hung up. 

Blair hung his up and said out loud, “Oh joy.”

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair’s cell went off and it was Jim. “Hey, why are you calling first thing this morning?”

“I wanted to tell you that I called my mom to see if I could see her and meet her after all of these years, but she said I was part of the past and she doesn’t live in the past anymore. She said she didn’t want to ever see me again and that was it. I was sort of upset and Rafe had to give me a hug. I just thought I’d tell you that I at least tried,” Jim explained. 

“Jim, I’m so sorry about that. She doesn’t deserve a son like you anyhow. Just remember all of the people that do love you. That’s what’s important anyway.”

“I just wanted to tell you before I forgot.”

“Yeah, like you’ll ever forget that, Jim.”

“That’s true. I love you.”

“And I love you. Now work hard and I’ll see you soon,” Blair said. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair’s first patient for the day was Tom Jacobs. He was a fairly nice man, but he had terrible anxiety attacks. Blair was working on them with him, but he tried to get Tom into a group sessions and Tom was fighting that. 

Blair buzzed Jess and told her to bring Tom in. 

Tom walked in and smiled and sat down where he always sat. Then he got up and started to pace, like he always did and finally he would sit down and look at Blair. “Hello Tom, how are you doing today?”

“It was a horrible day getting here. I had to drive and you know how much I hate driving. Then I had to stop at the store for cigarettes and wouldn’t you know I got behind two old ladies that had nothing better to do then talk to the clerk. Honestly, I don’t know how I ever made it here on time. They talked to that clerk forever. It was a nightmare. Then when I finally got here, the coffee was still brewing. I could have picked some up at the store, but I figured I would wait and have a cup here, like I always do. But your girl must have gotten side tracked. She does that a lot. She gets too busy on the phone and doesn’t take care of your day to day things. If I was you, I would talk to her.”

“Tom, do you drink your coffee black?” Blair asked getting up. 

“Two creams and two sugars, please,” Tom answered. 

Blair poured him a cup of hot coffee from his machine and put two and two and then handed it to him. 

“Thank you, Blair. Now I won’t be able to drink it until later because it’s too hot and I could burn my mouth,” Tom whined. 

“Well save it for later,” Blair said. 

“But I’m thirsty now. Do you have anything else to drink?” Blair sighed and got up. Tom asked him this every week when he couldn’t drink his coffee soon enough. 

Blair always got him a bottle of his water. He handed the water to Tom and said, “You know Tom, you could bring in your own drink if you’d like. It’s not like we have a no drink or food rule here.”

“I think that for what I pay each week, I should get a damn cup of coffee,” Tom said. 

Trying to change the subject, Blair said, “So how are things going with group?”

“I hate it Blair. They want me to listen to other people whine. Like I want to do that. I’ve got things to talk about and half the time I never get a chance because they’re all talking. I hate group. They’re a bunch of whiney, obnoxious people and I don’t care to be around them.”

“Well your insurance will only pay for one visit a month, up to 12 visits a year. So it’s either group or once a month with me. You can go to group up to two times a week, you should probably think that over.”

“I don’t have to think it over. I’ll come once a month to you. Can you help me once a month?” Tom wondered. 

“Tom, honestly I think you need more therapy and you can’t get it here coming only once a month. You can come once a month, but I still want you to be in the group therapy too. What do you think of that?”

“I think it sucks. Are you listening to me? They suck with their whining and drama. I’m so sick of it,” Tom continued to whine. 

“Tom, I think you could have something helpful to say now and then. That’s why I thought group therapy would be good for you. Tell me an example of what someone said,” Blair asked. 

“There’s this woman, we’ll call her Babs. She whines for at least a half hour of the hour about her cats. She has people complaining about the smell of her cats seeping through the walls and she doesn’t know what to do,” Tom said. 

“What would you tell her to do?” Blair asked. 

“I would tell her to ask a friend over to clean out the litter box and then clean out the entire area so it didn’t smell so bad. I had to do that with my cats and it worked like a charm,” Tom said. 

“So what did she say when you told her this?” Blair asked. 

“Oh I don’t talk. I just listen.”

“Tom, from now on say something if you have something to offer. It would be good for both of you. Babs would have listened and been better off that week. Now I want to hear that you’re talking and helping someone else besides you. You tend to focus on only you most of the time. It’s better to focus on others some of the time. Promise me you’ll try harder,” Blair pleaded. 

“Okay, I’ll try harder. I guess I could tell Babs at the end of the session about what I did and see if it helps her,” Tom said. 

“Good job, that’s improvement. I like to see you motivated, Tom. You’re doing much better this week. Now tell me about your month.”

While Blair listened, he knew in his heart that the woman Tom had talked about was really named Babs. Tom has no imagination and wouldn’t have been able to think up a name that fast. Blair had to smile to himself about that. 

&&&&&&&&&&

At five o’clock Blair called Jim. “Ellison.”

“Are you doing anything for dinner?” Blair asked. 

“I had an extremely long day, so dinner with you would be a great improvement. Where do you want to go?”

“I thought I would pick something up and bring it to the house,” Blair said. 

“That would be great. Surprise me,” Jim said, “I’ll be home by 6:30.”

“Okay, I’ll see you then,” Blair said. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim got home and couldn’t believe how great it felt to be in his own place. Sometimes work was a pain in the butt. Today was one of those days. He could hardly wait to tell Blair about the gun club that Blair now belonged to. Hopefully he wasn’t pushing Blair into something he didn’t want to do. He would have to be sure when he talked to him later. 

Jim changed into blue jeans and a tee and waited for Blair to get there. He was reading the paper when he heard Blair’s heartbeat in the elevator. _‘Shit, I can tell his heartbeat from anyone else’s.’_

He opened up the door and met Blair at the elevator. Blair smiled and said, “Anxious, much?”

“Wait until I tell you something I just realized,” Jim said as he pushed Blair into the loft. 

“What?” Blair said excitedly. 

“I heard your heartbeat in the elevator and knew it was yours. No one else’s but yours. Do you think that’s cool or what?” Jim asked. 

Blair kissed Jim and said, “I think its past cool. It’s awesome. I love how you discover new things about it every day. It’s great. Did you have a really long day today?”

“Yes, it seemed it would never end. How was your day?” 

“Well, on Thursday’s I have what I like to call the whiner’s club. Every single one of them whines the entire time they are there and think it’s everyone else that has the problem. So Thursday’s are a hard day for me,” Blair explained. 

Jim pulled Blair into a huge hug and then kissed him again. “Did that help?”

“Yes, it did. I’m telling you, just thinking about you today was my salvation. Sometimes I talk about you like you’re some religious experience.”

Jim burst out laughing. “Boy, wouldn’t Father O’Reilly love to hear that one?”

Blair curled up into Jim’s body and Jim said, “Not to be a whiner or anything, but weren’t you bringing dinner?”

Blair laughed at the whiner comment. “Dinner is coming in another ten minutes. We’re having pizza. I couldn’t think of anything and didn’t want to use my brain too much, so I whined in an order.”

They both started laughing and then kissing again. “You better stop, or you’re going to answer the door with that hard on,” Jim said. 

“What did you find out about the gun club?” Blair asked, changing the subject. 

“Our first night is tonight. I bought a gun there, ammo, paper targets and rented a booth three times a week. It’s going to be fun. You wait and see,” Jim promised. 

“Actually, I’m looking forward to it. It’ll be something I’ll overcome. Fear of guns.”

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Jim wondered. 

“If I’m not, I can leave, Jim. I’m an adult and don’t have to do things I don’t want to. Like see my mother for instance,” Blair whined some more. 

“She’ll get used to having the pig around, you just wait and see.” Then Jim oinked like a pig and Blair started laughing. Blair felt better then he had all day long. Yes, Jim Ellison was very good for him. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Once they were done eating, they left for the gun club. Jim had his gun in his holster and then in a bag. Blair went in with a bag and that was all. The gun and bullets were going to be waiting for him. 

They got there and signed in. Jim got Blair’s gun, holster, ammunition and they walked into the area with the booths. Jim and Blair were in booth 1 and 2. Jim liked them the best and the manager liked to keep Jim happy.

Jim showed Blair how to load the paper targets, load the gun, how to hold the gun and how to stand while shooting the gun. Blair picked it all up easily. Then Jim said, “Now press this button and the target will go down to the end and that’s what you’re going to be shooting at. Try for head and chest area. But don’t be alarmed if you don’t get any.”

Blair put on the ear phones, held his gun just the way Jim had showed him, standing just the way Jim had showed him and shot the target and Jim just sat there with his mouth agape. Blair had gotten all chest and head shots. He didn’t miss a one out of the six shots. 

Jim clicked the button to bring the target down to the end and all of these cops said, “New cop, Elllison?”

“No, he’s a friend of mine and didn’t know how to shoot, so I brought him tonight. It looks like he might be a natural.”

They all patted Blair on the back as they walked by and said, “Way to go. Good shooting.”

Jim was very quiet and finally said, “You’ve never shot a gun before, right?”

“No, I swear Jim. I just aimed for the chest and head and that’s where it went. Maybe the next one won’t be so easy,” Blair said as he loaded the gun for the next paper target. He took down that target, put up a new one and sent it down to the end of the line. He put his ear phones on, took aim and shot off six rounds fast as can be. Then he pushed the button to bring the target back again. This time he had gotten all six in the heart area. 

“Jim, why is it doing that?” Blair wondered. 

“You’re a natural. You can’t beat that. Just keep practicing. I’m going to shoot some now.” Jim said as he went into the next row. 

Blair turned around on his fifth target and saw that even the owner of the place was watching him. He was embarrassed. He didn’t want all of that notice. Besides, it seemed to upset Jim. Blair thought Jim probably wanted to teach him everything about guns. Well, he did. He taught him how to stand, how to load it, how to aim it and how to shoot it. Jim was just a great teacher, and Blair was going to tell him as much. 

Blair got all of his stuff and put it in the bag and waited for Jim to get done. Blair had shot up about a dozen targets, so he figured that was enough for right then. 

Jim put all of his away and they started out of the area. Blair looked sad as he said, “I’m sorry, Jim. I didn’t mean to do that well. I don’t want this coming between us.”

Jim looked around and said, “Don’t worry Chief, I’m just jealous. You’re a better shot then I am.” Then Jim hugged him but didn’t let go before three cops from the station saw him do it. Jim just glared at them and they snickered. 

Blair and Jim walked out to the SUV and Blair said, “Once a week enough for practice?” 

“You only need practice once a month. Now let’s go home and practice something that we’re not as good at.”

“Wait a minute, are you saying I don’t make love well?” Blair asked. 

“I’m teasing, Chief, Geeze, calm down. You make love really well. But more practice makes perfect. I’d like to practice tonight,” Jim said. 

“Oh that sounds good. Hurry up and get there or we’ll have to do it in the parking lot in front of all of the cops,” Blair joked. 

“There were three cops that saw me hugging you tonight, that’s probably as much gossip as they can handle right now.”

“Does this bother you, Jim?”

“Nope. Doesn’t bother me at all. I know there will be rumors but I’m not going to worry about it now.”

Blair wanted to hug Jim in the worst way, but knew this wasn’t the place or the time. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When they got to Jim’s loft, Blair asked, “Jim, you never really said much about the other night after we made love. Did I hurt you? Did you like it? Did you hate it? Any comments at all?”

Jim hugged Blair and said, “I loved it. Not that I want to give up topping, because I love topping too. And by the way, you’re a lovely bottom.”

“Come on, let’s go upstairs and I’ll be your lovely bottom again,” Blair said as he ran for the stairs. Jim caught up rather quickly. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim got up the next morning and Blair was gone early. God, he hated that. He could hardly wait until Blair moved in with him. He was never going to grow tired of that man. He knew that much. 

He took a shower, dressed and was drinking a cup of coffee when there was a knock at the door. Jim had heard this person in the hall but wasn’t expecting anyone, so he didn’t think much about it. He opened the door and found a lovely woman standing there. “May I help you?”

The gorgeous red head asked, “Jim Ellison?”

“Yes, that’s me.”

“I’m Naomi Sandburg, Blair’s mother. I wanted to meet you before we go out tonight. I thought we should have a chat,” Naomi said. 

“Where are my manners, come on in.”

She walked in and looked around and frowned. “This is where my son plans on moving in two weeks?”

“Well, we’re doing a lot of renovation to it before then. It’s going to look much better. Not to mention we’ll have things on the walls,” Jim answered. 

Naomi walked up to him and touched his face. “You are beautiful. I can understand why he’s interested. Your face is very chiseled, with a sharp, clean look to it. He’s always been into the handsome boys. Did he tell you about his track record?”

Jim understood what was going on. She didn’t like him and was trying to turn him against Blair. Well, it wasn’t going to work. Jim wasn’t going to fall for her tricks. 

“Yes, Blair and I told each other about our past lives.” He lied. 

“He told you about Patrick?”

“We didn’t mention names, Naomi. That’s crude.”

“Well, Patrick was the love of his life. Patrick dumped him and went off with a woman. So Blair has done the same thing with everyone he dates. As soon as it’s serious, he goes off with a woman. I’m just warning you.”

“I hear you, but it doesn’t matter. Blair and I love each other,” Jim said coldly. 

“He’ll never love you like Patrick. Just ask him about him. He’ll freak out. He’s a shrink for crying out loud and he still freaks out about Patrick. So you might want to give it some thought,” Naomi warned again. 

“I have to get to work,” Jim said as he almost pushed her out the door. 

“It was good meeting you, Jim. I’m sorry you won’t be with him for long,” Naomi said. 

Jim went down and got into his SUV and was breathing hard. His heart was pounding like a bass drum. Who was this Patrick? And why didn’t Blair tell him about him?”

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim knew that he was going to have to ask Blair about Patrick, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear who he was or not. But the cop in Jim had to know. He also needed to listen to what was said around the station, because those three asses that saw him hug Blair wouldn’t let that alone either. People always seemed to need to start trouble. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Connor walked into the bullpen pissed off. Everyone knew it and Jim knew it had something to do with him. She had this protective look on her face. Jim got up and walked over to her and said, “Is there a new rumor?”

“Oh, you already know about it?”

“No, that’s why I’m asking what was said,” Jim stated. 

“Room 3 is open, I’ll meet you there,” Connor said before she stormed off. 

Jim was glad she was his friend and not an enemy. She wouldn’t be a good enemy to have. 

He walked into room 3 and she shut the door hard. “They’re spreading lies about you and Blair.”

“How do you know that they’re lies?

“You don’t seem the type to hug Blair at the gun club in front of all those cops. So I figured they made it up,” Connor said. 

“Nope, I hugged him. He was upset and I hugged him. I should be able to hug my lover whenever I want to, don’t you agree?”

“Yes, I agree, but Jim, now you’re going to have those guys on your case forever.”

“Then, that’s what will have to happen. I’m not going to play their games,” Jim said. . 

Connor didn’t agree with him, but she wasn’t going to argue with the man either. He had a right to his own opinion. Especially since it had to do with him. 

 

&&&&&&&&&&

“Honey, when are we going to dinner with Jim?”

“I can’t get a hold of him right now. It might be tomorrow. He keeps odd hours sometimes. Being a cop isn’t always easy, mom.”

“Call him again, that’s rude that he’s not calling you back,” she said. 

Blair called again and Jim answered this time, “Hey Chief.”

“My mom is in town and wants to meet us for dinner at 8:00 tonight at Red Lobster. Is that good for you?” Blair asked. 

“That’s fine. Are you going to come over to the house before we meet her?” 

“I was thinking about it, is that cool?” Blair asked. 

“Very cool. See you anytime after 5:00. I’m leaving in a few minutes,” Jim said. 

“Okay, see you soon. Bye.”

“Bye, Blair.”

Jim hung up the phone and felt sad. He might not have his lover after tonight and that upset him like crazy. 

Jim got done with everything and left for the day. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim waited for Blair to show up at his house before meeting Naomi for dinner. He hoped he would have enough time to talk to Blair about Patrick before they had to go. 

Who was this Patrick, anyhow? Blair and Jim had discussed nothing about past lovers. Maybe they should have. Naomi made it sound like Patrick was the love of Blair’s life. He sure hoped that Naomi wasn’t going to bring him back into Blair’s life. Jim wasn’t going to share Blair, It was as simple as that. Jim wasn’t a stand up kind of guy, never was. 

Blair walked into the loft using his key for the first time feeling really good about it and Jim was standing there looking very unhappy. “Hey Jim, what’s up?”

Before Jim could stop himself, he said, “Who is Patrick?”

Jim watched Blair’s face fall, turn pale and looked crazed for a moment. “Why are you asking about Patrick?”

“Your mother stopped by this morning and told me to ask you about him. So answer me, who is he?”

“My mother said that? She will stop at nothing to break us up. I don’t want to go out to eat with her tonight,” Blair said. 

“Blair, you still haven’t answered me. Who is this fucker?” Jim shouted and Blair jumped a foot off the floor. 

Jim knew he had done the wrong thing immediately. Blair grabbed his jacket and walked out the door, slamming the door behind him. 

Jim had thought that Naomi was wrong, but maybe she was right. If he didn’t want to talk about it, chances were he was still in love with the fucker. 

Jim listened and heard Blair pacing in the hallway outside his door. He hadn’t left, he was just thinking. This made Jim smile. He opened up the door and said, ”I’m done yelling. Come back in.”

Blair did just that. He took his jacket off and sat down on the sofa. “If you want to hear about Patrick, then get in here.”

Jim sat down next to him and waited for Blair to start. 

“I met him about 9 years ago. He was everything I wanted in a male lover at first. He was very charming, gorgeous and very attentive. But after about a month, he started changing. He started pushing me around, shoving me and then out and out hitting me whenever he was upset about anything. He kept me to himself for five months, I couldn’t tell anyone about him, or he would beat me more. He abused me for 6 months all together and I finally got a chance to get out of the city and I took it. I was gone for two years on a dig. I made everyone promise not to tell him where I was. I didn’t even tell my mom where I was. I haven’t seen him since. He wasn’t the love of my life. He was the nightmare of my life. My mother never knew because I didn’t tell her. Then when I dated any men that showed signs of abuse I would dump them and go with women again. Until I met you, I never trusted anyone like I do you. When you let me fuck you, I knew you were different. You let me be me. And for this I’ll always be grateful. Jim you made me trust again. The reason I didn’t leave just now was because I knew you were just jealous and upset about what my mom said. My mother doesn’t know very much about me, Jim. She thinks she does, but she doesn’t. I swear, I never loved him. I thought he was hot, because he was, but that was it. Please say you believe me,” Blair hoped he had gotten through to Jim this time. 

“I will always believe you, Blair. You have given me no reason to distrust you. I love you and I would never hurt you. Well at least I thought so, but tonight I hurt you. I saw you jump when I yelled. I scared you. I’m so sorry and I hope you can forgive me. I had no right to do that to you. I was treating you like a piece of meat that I owned. God, I’m so sorry.” Jim put his head into his hands and just sat there. 

Blair sat closer to him and pulled his hands away from his face. “Jim, could I move in with you now?”

Jim looked somewhat surprised and asked, “Tonight?”

“Yes, I don’t need two weeks to decide. You’re a good man and I love you,” Blair said happily. 

“Do you forgive me for what I did tonight?” Jim asked. 

“I forgive you, babe. I love you,” Blair answered. 

“I love you too. Let’s go get your things and move them in. What about dinner with your mom?” Jim asked. 

“Fuck my mom, Jim. She did this with malice and I’m not forgiving her right now,” Blair replied. 

“Blair, I don’t want to come between you and your mom. That just won’t work. I’m sorry.”

“Oh, no you don’t. Fine, we’ll go out with my mom tonight, but I’m going to tell her about her darling Patrick. She’s going to be sorry she ever brought it up.” 

Jim was afraid of what Blair was going to tell her. “Did you want to meet with your mom and talk to her first?”

“No, I can talk to her with you there, Jim. We have no secrets. Do we?”

“Blair, I have no secrets. I told you I was married, that’s as big a secret as I ever had in my life. And it really wasn‘t a secret.”

“Was she the love of your life, though?” Blair wondered.

“No, sadly it was a mistake. You know I tried to hide behind marriage instead of being out at the station. I never loved her enough. And she married me because she thought we would be happy and have a family. She always wanted to have a family. I didn’t, thank God.”

“You don’t like children?” Blair asked.

“I like children just fine, but I didn’t love Carolyn. It would have been a mistake to have a child with her. I didn’t want to hurt her anymore than I did.”

“Maybe someday we could adopt a child. Would you ever consider that?” Blair asked. 

“We could consider an older child, like one that could understand about us being gay. Besides, the older children need homes too.” Jim said. 

“I love you so much. When am I going to meet your family?” Blair asked. 

“I thought Sunday would be good. I’m going to call my dad and tell him that I have someone I’d like him to meet. He’ll freak out at first, but he’ll come around. So will Steven. You’re going to love Pam,” Jim said. 

“Were there any rumors today at the station?” Blair asked, switching gears once again. 

“Yes, there were. But I ignored them all. Life goes on, Blair.” 

&&&&&&&&&&

They met Naomi at Red Lobster at 8:00 and got seated right away. Naomi said, “You’ll never guess who I talked to today?”

“Oh Jesus, Naomi, tell me you didn’t contact Patrick,” Blair pleaded. 

“Of course I contacted him. He called me when he moved and said to let him know when you were ready for love again. So I told him that I thought it might be time.” 

Blair said, “Excuse me a moment.” He rushed for the bathroom. 

Jim was torn between following his lover into the restroom or killing Naomi. He decided to yell at her instead. 

“Naomi, you’re such a bitch. Patrick abused him physically and sexually for six long months. He went on a dig to get away from him. He knew Patrick would never find him in Peru. So you just opened up an old wound and one that he didn’t need opened again.”

“This isn’t true. He told me he loved Patrick when I would call. He said he was the love of his life,” Naomi said angrily. 

Blair sat down next to Jim and whispered, “He forced me to say those things when you would call. He threatened you if I told you, so I never did. And now you’ve told him where I am. He’ll come for me and kill me this time.”

“Blair, how would I know this? I was going by what you said on the phone to me,” Naomi said in her defense. 

“It doesn’t matter now. I’m a dead man,” Blair said with a defeated look on his face. 

“Where is he, Naomi?” Jim asked very angrily. 

“He’s in Seattle. He’s been there for a long, long while. I didn’t know any of this Blair. How would I know this?”

“Mom, the whole point is, I was gone for two years and you didn’t know. My friends said they never got a call from you once. And then you find out I’m in love with Jim and you call Patrick, who was my nightmare from hell? Why would you do that? If I’m in love with someone, you don’t ask another man to come into the picture. It’s just wrong, Naomi.”

“I didn’t want you in love with a pig, darling.”

“Fuck you, mom.” Blair got up and walked out of the restaurant. Jim said, “What he said.” Then he walked out, pushed Blair towards the SUV and they both got in. 

Naomi sat alone in the booth and wondered where she had gone wrong with Blair. He was so out of control. She knew it had to have something to do with that pig he was hanging out with. Pigs always made trouble. Never once did she worry about what Patrick might do to her son. She never even wondered why he had hurt her son in the first place. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim and Blair stopped by Blair’s apartment and got Blair’s things that he would need for the next few days. It didn’t take Jim and Blair long to load it up in the SUV and move it over to Jim’s. 

Once they got to the loft, Jim said, “Blair, I need you to memorize my birthday because that’s the safe combination. Inside will be your gun, ammo and anything else you might need. When I’m at work you don’t open the door to anyone and I’d really like you to take some time off from work. Do you think you could?”

“Yes, I could. Sean Gabriel would take over my patients for me. I’m going to take two weeks off. I’m hoping you can find him before then. You could scare him couldn’t you, Jim?”

“Yes, I could scare him. But you have a gun and you know how to use it. So I want it loaded from now on, in the safe and you’ll be ready if he gets in the house. I’m not trying to scare you, Blair, I’m trying to ready you for anything.”

Blair went upstairs and opened the safe, took his gun out, loaded it and put it back in and locked the safe. Jim watched Blair do it and knew he would be able to defend himself at any time. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Naomi called numerous times, but Blair ignored her calls. He had had it with his mother and her games. It was time to take care of business. He prayed that Patrick would come to the loft. He would be ready for him. He didn’t need to think about no-violence Naomi. She would probably try and talk him into seeing the monster again. Naomi was blind when it came to Blair’s love life. She didn’t know who was good for him or not. And then when Blair finally met someone that was great for his life, Naomi tried to push him away from Blair. Blair realized he could never win with his mother. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim really hoped that they could find Patrick before he had to kill him himself. Jim thought that someone like that would only stop with death. 

Jim and Connor were working a case. Jim couldn’t keep his mind on it very well, but Connor was helping him stay busy and focused. Blair hadn’t called, so everything was good. Jim wouldn’t be able to get home that night until about 7:00 or later. He hoped Blair was doing alright. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair was upstairs folding clothes in the bedroom when he heard someone playing with the front door. Blair looked over the railing and saw that someone was moving the handle. Blair raced back and got his gun out and sat down on the floor waiting for Patrick to find him. He hid the gun under his shirt and waited. 

It didn’t take Patrick long to break in. He saw the light on upstairs and knew that Blair was probably up there. He knew the big guy wasn’t there because his vehicle wasn’t. Patrick walked upstairs and saw Blair sitting on the floor. 

“Come here, Blair.”

“I don’t have to listen to you ever again,” Blair said softly. 

“Get on the bed before I make it worse for you,” Patrick said in a growl as he undid his belt and unzipped his jeans. 

Blair didn’t move and Patrick went to get him and Blair pulled the gun out and shot him. One shot was all it took. He hit him right in the heart. Blair called the police and told them that he had just killed an intruder that was trying to rape him. They told him to put the gun away and wait for them to show up. Blair followed their instructions to a tee. 

Blair looked down at Patrick’s cold dead eyes and realized he didn’t have to worry about this man ever again. He was free. No one was going to understand his happiness, they would all think he was in shock, but he was happy. He had lived in fear for so long that he had forgotten what freedom and peace felt like. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Simon came storming out of the office and said, “Ellison, you’re with me.”

Jim knew it was Blair and he knew it was bad. “What? What happened to Blair?”

“Nothing happened to Blair but he killed someone,” Simon stated. 

Jim almost smiled and said, “I’m sure it was self defense.”

“The police said that the intruder was going to rape Blair. So Blair shot him and killed him. Hell I didn’t even know he knew how to shoot a gun.” Simon was in awe of this man. 

“I taught him how. He was a natural. He probably shot him right in the heart,” Jim said coldly. 

“That’s what they’re saying; it was right in the heart.”

As soon as they got to the loft, Jim jumped out of the car and rushed up the stairs, two at a time. 

Two cops stopped him and he showed this his ID and walked in. Blair was sitting on the sofa looking pretty calm, actually. Jim sat next to him and said, “You all right?”

“Peachy,” Blair answered. 

The DA came and said, “We’re not charging you. It was self-defense. You were just lucky you were cleaning your gun at the time. If you wouldn’t have been, he could have hurt you.”

Jim looked over at Blair and saw Blair almost smile. Jim knew this was going to be a tough one on Blair. “Can I take him to a hotel now?” Jim asked. 

Simon said, “I think that’s a good idea. Take him away from here.”

Jim said, “I’m going to go upstairs and get some things for us. You stay right here.”

“Kick him as you walk by him, Jim.” Blair was whispering Sentinel soft, so no one heard but Jim. 

Jim wondered if Blair was alright or maybe in shock. Jim hurried upstairs and kicked Patrick as he went by. One of the cops saw him do it and just shrugged. Jim packed a bag for the two of them and then went downstairs to collect Blair. He kicked Patrick on the way back down too. 

Jim got him into the SUV and buckled him in. “Jim, I remember how to buckle a seat belt.”

“Just helping you out, Chief.”

As Jim drove the vehicle, he said, “I kicked him for you, Chief, twice.”

Blair turned to Jim and smiled. “Thank you, Jim.”

Blair leaned back and held Jim’s hand. Jim knew that things were going to be rough, but they would work them out together. Blair wasn’t going to be charged, so there was no hearing. And now all Jim had to do was get him to see someone about it. That was going to be the hard part. 

Simon answered his cell, “Banks.”

“Simon, I’m going to take three days off to spend with Blair. I hope you don’t mind me jumping ship like this,” Jim explained. 

“Take five and then you know that he’ll be with someone that cares about him. He was in shock tonight, Jim. Make sure he sees someone about this,” Simon ordered. 

“He’s going to see his shrink, so that’s all taken care of. Don’t worry, Simon. I’ll take care of him.”

Both of the men closed their phones, hoping that Blair would be alright. 

Things would slowly get back to what was considered normal. If anyone knew what normal was. 

 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair spent the next five days off and on with Dr. Sidney Grey. Blair knew he had been in shock at first, but now he still felt nothing. He needed help. Sidney was just the person to help him. 

People always thought that since they were psychologists, they should always be on top of things. It turned out that Blair found out he was just as screwed up as any of his patients. Sidney was helping him realize that this was part of life and he was no different. 

They worked on Blair’s reaction to the shooting and Sidney helped Blair realize that he wouldn’t be sad about killing the man that had come back into his life to rape and probably kill him. Happiness wasn’t a good thing, while thinking about it, but acceptance would be all right. Blair was feeling better and better each time he saw Sidney. 

Jim could tell that the doctor was helping Blair a great deal. He was starting to smile again and he was starting to look at Jim like he almost wanted him once more. Jim hoped that all of this didn’t break them up. Jim was worried about Blair, but still worried about the two of them. Where would this leave them now? 

Blair was still sleeping in Jim’s bed, but Jim had made no advances. Jim knew that it was going to be Blair that had to make the first move. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim called his dad and asked if it would be all right if he brought Blair to the game and dinner on the following Sunday. Blair assured Jim that he was fine and would love to meet everyone. 

William had agreed saying they were all anxious to meet this man that killed the intruder in Jim’s loft. Jim hoped they didn’t bring it up. He didn’t think they would. They could all think it without actually saying anything to Blair. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair came home from the therapist on Sunday in a really good mood. Sidney was so nice about meeting him on Sundays. “Guess who gets to start back on Monday?”

“You don’t think you’re pushing yourself?” Jim asked. 

“Nah. I’m fine Jim. I hated the man. I killed him before he hurt me again. I’ve come to terms with it. Now if you would stop making such a big deal out of it, it would be fine,” Blair pointed out. 

“Okay. I understand. I wouldn’t have felt bad about killing him either.” Jim replied. 

“He wasn’t worth any bad feelings, Jim. Now let’s stop discussing him.”

“Dinner is on for today, is that still good with you?”

“Oh cool. I can’t wait to meet Pam. She sounds so interesting. Not that I don’t want to meet your dad and your brother, but they probably aren’t going to like me much. Chances are, Pam will be the only one who might like me,” Blair said. 

“Hey, I like you,” Jim said and pulled Blair in for a kiss. Blair let him and this made Jim very happy. Would you like to take a shower before we leave?” Jim asked. 

“Yeah, come on, we haven’t had a shower together in ages. It’s time,” Blair said as he stripped all the way into the bathroom. 

Jim turned his sixth sense up and prayed it would work on Blair for a change. _‘God, I hope he doesn’t want to fuck me. I don’t think I can do it. I’m not ready yet.’_

“Hey babe, I think we might be rushing things. You take a shower and we’ll do things later this week. There is no rush. We’re going to be together for a long, long while,” Jim said. 

“Thanks, Jim. You’re always so understanding. I love you so much,” Blair confessed truthfully. 

_‘God, he’s a good man. I don’t know how I ever got someone as wonderful as him.’_

Jim turned down the sense and realized that Blair was fine. He was just trying to become the old Blair again. Jim was going to stop putting so much pressure on him. Things would work out just fine. 

&&&&&&&&&&

When Blair and Jim arrived at William’s, Blair was nervous. Jim didn’t say anything to him, because Jim was nervous too. Jim didn’t know how Steven and William would take to meeting the actual male in Jim’s life. It’s one thing to hear that someone is gay but it’s another to actually meet the person and picture the two together. 

William opened the door and said, “Come on in.”

“Dad, this is Blair Sandburg. Blair this is William Ellison.”

“It’s good to meet you, Blair. My son has talked about you a great deal. But he was afraid he wasn’t going to get you, so I’m happy to see that you two worked out. Come on in and meet Pam and Steven. They came early so they could see you before the game.”

Jim whispered, “God forbid anyone talk during the game.” 

Blair chuckled and pinched Jim on the ass. Yes, Blair was getting back to his old self. 

“Steven and Pam, this is Blair Sandburg, my lover and friend.” Pam got up and hugged him. “It’s so good to meet someone that makes Jimmy so happy.”

Steven shook hands with him and said, “It’s really good to meet you. I know that things have been a little wild for you lately, so it’s nice that you found time to come over and meet us. Do you like football?”

“I love football. Not quite as much as I love watching the Jags on television, but I do love sports. Pam, do you like football?” Blair asked. 

“Yes, I do. I’m not sure I understand all of the calls, but I really do enjoy seeing all those men wearing the tight pants,” Pam said laughing. 

Steven groaned, so did William. Blair said, “Tell me about it.” This time it was Jim who pinched Blair. 

They all talked and had a good visit before the game started. Jim and Blair went into the kitchen for the snack food and Blair said, “I think they like me.”

“I love you,” Jim said quietly. 

“I know you do, and I’m so glad. I’m the luckiest man in the world. Thank you.” Blair grabbed some of the food and grabbed plates and napkins. Jim brought the rest of the things out. 

As they watched the game, Jim listened to their thoughts. William thought, _‘I never would have believed that he would find someone that makes him happy, but he sure did. I couldn’t be happier’_

Steven thought, _‘He seems like a nice guy. If Jimmy has to go for guys, I guess he’s all right.’_

Pam thought, _‘I just love this man. I hope we can be friends.’_

Blair thought, _‘I’m going to make love to Jim tonight. I think it’s time.’_

Jim blushed and Blair watched him and said, “Jim, can I see you in the kitchen for a moment?”

Jim knew he’d been found out. 

“I can’t believe you’re listening to my thoughts. When have you been able to hear them?” Blair asked. 

“Just today. I haven’t tried before then. I’m sorry, Chief. I was listening to all of their thoughts and I just heard yours before I could shut it off.”

“Do they like me?” Blair asked bouncing in place. 

“They love you. Hell, no one said anything about me,” Jim pouted. 

“I did.”

“Oh yeah, you sure did. And what you were thinking sounds super good to me tonight. I love you, Blair.”

“I love you, Jim.”

They walked back out to the game and everyone filled them in on what they had missed. 

Once the game was over, they all had dinner, cleaned up the kitchen and then it was time to leave. 

Blair said, “Pam, how would you like to come downtown to meet for lunch next week?”

Pam smiled. “That would be marvelous. Do you have one of your cards? I could call you and set it up?”

Blair pulled his cards out and gave one to everyone in case they needed him for anything. 

“Thursday would be my best day,” Blair said. 

“We’ll shoot for Thursday then. I’ll give you a call and find out what time and where,” Pam said. 

Steven made a pouty face and said, “You notice I didn’t get invited.”

“I didn’t think you would want to talk about your brother with me,” Blair teased. 

“Oh man, you are so right,” Steven answered. 

“Wait a minute, who said you’re going to be discussing me?” Jim asked. 

“Jim, I always talk about you,” Blair replied. 

“Good things, I hope.”

“The best, Jim, the best.”

William and Steven both started laughing and Jim wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or not. But he got into it and laughed along with them. 

William hugged both Jim and Blair goodbye. So did Steven and Pam. It had been a great day. 

&&&&&&&&&&

That night, Blair did exactly as he had promised. He made love to Jim like he never had. Jim was so glad to have Blair back all the way. Jim realized that he really liked being a bottom. It might have had something to do with how happy it made Blair or that prostate rubbing. Close call on that. Jim wouldn’t be able to tell you the answer if anyone had asked. 

&&&&&&&&&&

The next morning when Jim showed up at work, Connor said, “We’ve got a new murder mystery, Jimbo.”

“Tell me about it,” Jim answered. 

“A man was found in the park, robbed and stabbed. That’s all we have to go on so far,” Megan said. 

“Let’s go check out the crime scene and see if we can find anything unusual. Ready, partner?” Jim asked. 

“I’m ready. Let’s go and solve this case. I hate murders when there are no clues.”

They drove to the scene and Jim looked around and saw nothing out of the ordinary, but he did notice that when he looked straight across the park, there was a bank with an ATM outside. That meant it had a camera on it. That might be something they could check on. 

“Connor, there is a bank with a camera right down here. Maybe we’ll luck out and have our killer on tape,” Jim suggested. 

“Good thinking. But in the meantime we need to question his wife and his friends, don’t we? I mean, we won’t know who the killer is without something to go on, right?” Connor questioned. 

“Let’s go and talk to the wife right now. Do you have the addresses of all of his friends?” Jim asked. 

“Yes, let’s go talk to his wife right now,” Connor agreed. 

Jim drove over to the house and parked. They knocked on the door and it was opened by a sad looking, pregnant woman. “Yes?”

“I’m sorry to have to bother you, Mrs. Wilson, I’m Detective Ellison and this is my partner, Inspector Connor, we have some questions about your husband,” Connor started. 

“Come in, please?” She opened the door and led them into the living room. 

In the living room was a nice looking man that seemed as upset as Mrs. Wilson was. 

Mrs. Wilson said, “Detective Ellison and Detective Connor, this is our best friend, Sawyer Swift.”

Sawyer walked over to them and shook hands with them. They all sat down and Jim turned his senses up to see if he could hear anything or sense anything. 

_‘I know they will never suspect me. And I was at a party all night, so I have an alibi._ ’ 

Jim asked, “Mr. Swift, where were you last night?”

“Oh please. You’re going to ask me what **I** was doing? Why don’t you go and find the murderer instead?” Swift answered. 

“I need to ask where you were last night,” Jim said again. 

“I was at a party all night. Well, until about 3:00 this morning. You could ask anyone there,” Sawyer said angrily. “This is so typical that you ask the friends instead of going out and finding the killer.”

“We are looking, sir. We have to ask questions of everyone,” Connor said. 

Jim asked, “Mrs. Wilson, where were you last night?”

“I was here alone. I have no one to verify my whereabouts,” she said sadly. 

“Ma’am, I’m just asking, I don’t suspect you at this point at all,” Jim replied. 

_‘Oh good, he doesn’t really suspect me, he’s just asking questions. Good, now they will leave us alone. They don’t have to know that I’m supposed to be with Betty._ ’ Sawyer thought. 

“Did he have any enemies?” Connor asked. 

“He had none. He was one of the gentlest men in the universe. He was so kind; I can’t believe this happened to him,” Mrs. Wilson answered. 

“Well, we need to check some things out and then we’ll be back if we have more questions, Mrs. Wilson,” Jim said as he got up to leave. 

Connor knew that he had sensed something and she couldn’t wait to hear what he had sensed. 

They walked out to the SUV and Jim said, “Let’s hope that there is a picture of Sawyer Swift on the camera film, because it was him. But we have nothing to pin him to the murder. He even has an alibi. But a picture is worth a thousand words.”

“Why would he kill his best friend?” Connor asked. 

“He wanted to be with Mrs. Wilson. It’s as simple as that. But if we don’t have something to charge him with, we can’t get a search warrant for his house. We need to move fast before he gets rid of the weapon,” Jim said. 

“Let’s go back to the station and watch the video from the bank. It should be there by now. Then we’ll see if he’s on it. If he is, we can put in for a search warrant right away,” Connor said. 

They got to the station, watched the video and sure enough, Sawyer Swift was on it. So he wasn’t at the party as he had said he was. Connor called in for a search warrant and received the warrant quite quickly. 

Rafe and Brown were going with the officers to Swift’s house to search and Jim and Connor were going to arrest Swift. 

&&&&&&&&&&

On the drive over to Mrs. Wilson’s house, Connor said, “I don’t know what we would do without your sixth sense. That saved us a lot of time.”

“We would have found him anyway, Connor. It had little to do with my sixth sense and more to do with good police work.”

“She’s going to be so devastated. I hate to tell her,” Connor said. 

“We have to arrest him and we know where he is, so we have to go there and get him. You arrest him and I’ll try and calm Mrs. Wilson.”

They arrived, got out and walked up to the door. Mrs. Wilson opened it and said, “You’ve found something?”

“Yes, ma’am. Could we come in for a moment?” Jim asked. 

Connor walked up to Sawyer Swift, took her handcuffs out and said, “Sawyer Swift, I’m here to arrest you for the murder of Carl Wilson.” She then read him his rights while he ranted and raved about everything. 

Jim said, “I’m sorry, Mrs. Wilson. He was on film at the park. So we know that it’s him.”

She turned and screamed, “Why would you kill Carl?”

“Why? Because he took everything from me. You were supposed to be my wife. That baby was supposed to be mine. He stole everything from me and I couldn’t take it anymore,” Swift ranted. 

Mrs. Wilson had nothing to say to that. She walked over and slapped him and sat down on the sofa to cry. 

Jim sat with her while Connor took Swift out to the SUV. “Is there anyone I can call for you?” Jim asked. 

“No, Detective Ellison. I have a sister that will be here this afternoon. I’m fine. Thank you so much for finding my husband’s killer. I can’t believe the hatred that man must have carried for all of these years.”

“Just think about your husband and remember only good things, Mrs. Wilson. If there is anything you need, call me.” Jim handed her one of his business cards.

“Thanks, will you thank Inspector Connor for me, please? Now I must go lie down for a while.”

Jim left her and walked out the door. He knew she was sad, but she also knew who killed her husband now. That would help somewhat. 

They took Sawyer Swift back to the station and got him finger printed, booked and had him call his lawyer. It was a sad case, and Jim and Megan didn’t feel that good about the ending. Life sometimes sucked. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair had been in the loft for six months when he answered the door one Saturday and it was Carolyn Plummer. 

Blair said, “Can I help you?”

“I was looking for Jimmy Ellison,” the pretty woman said softly. 

“He lives here. Won’t you come in? He should be home in about five minutes. Would you like to wait?” Blair asked. 

“I’m his ex-wife and you are?”

“Oh sorry. I’ve never met you. I’m Blair Sandburg. I live with Jim.”

You live with Jimmy? This is only a one bedroom loft,” Carolyn spat out. 

“We share the one bedroom, Carolyn. I thought you knew that about your husband.”

“He’s not a fag,” she shouted. 

Jim opened the door and said, “Yes, I am, Carolyn. Don’t raise your voice to him again.”

“Jimmy, we were married.”

“I know that Carolyn and it was a big mistake. I liked being with men, but thought if I got married I would do better with women. I still wanted men while I was married, so I filed for divorce. I told you all of this.”

“You fooled around on me?” Carolyn asked, shocked. 

“No, I never fooled around while I was married. I wouldn’t have done that to you. I loved you enough for that,” Jim explained. 

“I came to ask you a favor, but I guess I can’t now,” she said. 

“Just ask, the worst I can say is no,” Jim said. 

“I was going to ask you to be the father of my child,” Carolyn said quickly. 

“Oh sorry, I can’t do that. I’m only going to have a family with Blair.”

“There is no room for a talk or anything? You wouldn’t consider it while we were married, but I figured maybe now. Especially since you wouldn’t have anything to do with bringing up the child.” Carolyn really didn’t think sometimes before she talked. 

“Carolyn, if I did agree to it, I would have partial custody. I would never give up my rights.”

“Well, at least I asked. My parents thought I was nuts anyhow. Too bad, Blair can’t have a child,” Carolyn said very sarcastically. 

“It was nice seeing you, Carolyn, but it’s time for you to go. You’re being rude.” Jim opened up the door and waited for her to walk out. 

After she left, Blair said, “Jim maybe we should look into a surrogate mother. That way we might get another Sentinel. That would be nice, don’t you think?”

“Blair, I don’t want a baby. I’d like an older child if we got one.” Jim was going to stick to his guns. 

“Anytime soon?” Blair asked. 

“Maybe in a year or so,” Jim answered. 

“I like the sounds of that,” Blair said. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim got off work and walked into the loft and Blair was waiting with dinner made. “Did you get off early today, Chief?”

“Yes, I did. Two patients cancelled, so I thought why not make meatloaf for dinner. I know it’s one of your favorites. Besides I wanted to talk to you,” Blair said. 

“Sure, talk away, I’m listening.”

“Do you leave your sixth sense dial up all the time now?” Blair asked. 

“No, only if I need it for a case or something like that, why?”

“You’ve been so attentive lately and I just thought maybe you had picked up on something I was thinking,” Blair explained. 

“No, I was attentive, because I adore you. What’s wrong?”

“I really want to have a child.”

“Blair, I’m a cop, we’re gay, this will be hard,” Jim said. 

“I’ve already talked to someone and they said that we have a good chance of being accepted as adoptive parents for older children. But she said they have babies too. Jim, stop making that face. Listen to me. My apartment could be made larger off the office and we could have a nanny live there to watch the child while I work. I’m really on board about this and want you to be too.”

“What brought this on, Blair?”

“Pam and Steven are going to adopt. The baby is 18 months old and a little boy. She called me today to say that they’re getting him. His name is Tyler and she’s thrilled. She’s always wanted a child, so this is perfect. Then she mentioned that she talked to the woman about us and she said they have a lot of children that need homes. We could at least fill out the paperwork, couldn’t we?” Blair asked. 

“Yes, we could fill out the paperwork. But I just don’t want you to get your hopes up,” Jim advised. 

“It’s too late. My biological clock is ticking so loud that it keeps me up at night. But we need to think about getting a house.”

“Blair, I don’t want to move.”

“We need to have a house with a yard and some extra bedrooms. We can’t just live in the loft and fill out the paperwork. Jim, if you don’t want to do it, then just tell me no.”

“Can I think about it before I decide?” Jim asked. 

“Sure, there is no rush.” Blair set the table and put dinner on the table. 

They were eating dinner and Blair was really quiet. Jim hated when Blair was quiet. So he said, “Okay we’ll fill the paperwork out and we’ll put the loft up for sale. I want you to be happy, Blair.”

“Jim, would you be happy?” Blair wondered. 

“I’ll be happy as long as you’re happy. That’s all I need in life is happiness from the people that surround me. But a child does sound nice.”

Blair went and sat on Jim’s lap and they talked about the first thing that popped up numerous times. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Naomi showed up at Blair’s office the following day and Blair actually let her into the office. Even Naomi was surprised. 

“Blair, we have to get past this.”

“Mom, you tried to have me killed. Tell me how I’m supposed to get over that?”

“Honey, I didn’t know about him. You should have told me the truth earlier,” Naomi reasoned. 

“Naomi, I told you about Susan and you didn’t listen. You did everything you could to make things worse. I don’t know what you want from me.”

“Blair, I want my son back. I’ll even put up with the pig you live with. That’s how much I love you.”

“And yet, you called him a pig. Way to make me feel like you really mean it, mom. No, it’s not going to work right now. I don’t want to see you anytime soon. Maybe six months from now, I’ll have forgiven you, but for now, I’m not. So have a good life, mom.”

She started to cry and Blair said, “Call me in six months, Naomi and we’ll see how I feel about things then.”

“I will darling. I’ll call you in six months. Know that I love you and adore you. I want you to be happy. So be happy.”

“That’s just it, mom, I am happy. I’ve never been this happy in my life. He’s wonderful and if you gave him a chance you would see that too.”

She got up and gave Blair a hug and then left the room. 

Blair felt sad, but at least he knew he might forgive her someday. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim and Blair sold the loft and bought a four bedroom house down the street from William. William helped them with their down payment. Jim didn’t want him to, but he insisted until he was being obnoxious. Jim finally gave in. They had filled out the paperwork three months before they sold the house. So it had been about six months they had been waiting. 

Blair asked, “Jim, what would you think about going to ask what they think about our application and then listen to see what they really say?” 

“Blair, I told you it takes time.”

“Jim, please. I want to know if they’re even trying,” Blair said. 

“I’ll think about it.”

“Jim, Tyler is almost two years old already. He’s going to have his second birthday and we’re still on the list. It just doesn’t seem right, does it?”

“Blair, I told you it would take time and it would be very hard. Didn’t I?”

“You’re right. We’ll do whatever you want to. Don’t mind me. I’m just overly emotional these days,” Blair admitted. 

Jim said, “Make the appointment.” Jim knew he was a sucker when it came to Blair. But somehow, he didn’t mind. Isn’t this the way all married people felt? 

&&&&&&&&&&

Blair made an appointment for the next day and Blair and Jim met them at about 3:00. Jim asked their case worker, “So how are things going, is there anything new?”

Jim was listening this time. _‘Why don’t they stop coming around here? When will they take no for an answer?’_

“Mrs. Jenkins, if we never had a chance, why did you have us fill out the paperwork?” Jim asked. 

She looked flustered and said, “Because he wanted it so badly. We didn’t have the heart to say no.”

“Is it because we’re gay?” Jim asked. 

“Partly. You have a very violent job, Mr. Ellison and that had to be considered too. You just weren’t a good mix with our clients. I’m truly sorry,” Mrs. Jenkins said. 

“If you were truly sorry, you would have told us the truth six months ago. You’re very cruel and I intend on bringing this up to a friend of mine that writes articles for the newspaper. She’ll be very interested in hearing all of this. Good day,” Jim said as he stormed out of the room. 

Jim didn’t say anything during the ride home. Blair was just too depressed to even try and talk. 

For the next week, they didn’t talk much. There was no sex and Blair was pulling away from Jim. Jim finally said to him. “Blair if you want out, so that you can have a child, go ahead. I wouldn’t keep you from it.”

Blair went into his arms and held on tight. Jim thought that meant he was leaving. 

“I could never leave you. I adore you too much. I just think its unfair how we didn’t have a chance while Steven and Pam got a chance right away. Little Tyler is so precious and there is no reason why we couldn’t have had the same type of life.” 

The phone rang and Jim picked it up, “Ellison.”

“Hi Mr. Ellison, its Maggie Bender from the Cascade Times. We have your story from one of our journalists and we’re getting it ready to run. I just wanted to read it to you to make sure that this is right.”

“Sure, go ahead. I’m listening.”

She read the entire article that was very long indeed. Jim had put it on speaker phone so that Blair could hear too. It said everything that Jim and Blair had said all along. It was a wonderful piece of work. They were impressed. 

“Yes, run it by all means,” Jim said. 

“Okay, it’s running tomorrow morning. You’ll probably be getting calls from different people. You don’t have to talk to anyone. Especially at the state run adoption agency that were so darn helpful.”

“Thank you, Maggie,” Blair said. 

“You are both welcome. Now just relax and enjoy getting your payback,” Maggie said. 

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim and Blair were still in bed at 8:00 when the phone rang. Jim reached over and picked it up. “What?”

“Mr. Ellison? 

“Yes?” 

“This is Sandra Backer from The State Adoption Agency. I wanted to set up a meeting for you and your partner. We have many children that could have used a home and you were passed over because of how someone that filed the paperwork felt. So we would like to start over again.”

“Ms. Backer, how do we know that the very same thing won’t happen to us again?” Jim asked, by this time Blair was sitting up taking notice. 

“First of all, we have about 19 children that need to be placed. So it would be up to you both to choose who you would want to make a family with.”

“When could we come down?” Jim asked. 

“I have an opening in an hour, if you have time,” Ms. Backer said. 

“We have time and we’ll be there in an hour. Thank you.” Jim turned to Blair and said, “We’re in this time.”  
&&&&&&&&&&

Jim and Blair made the appointment and saw the list of children that needed homes. Jim wanted only one child, an older one, but found out that there were many younger ones waiting for a home. They found a family of three that needed to be placed together and Jim and Blair decided on them. There was a baby girl at 13 months, a three year old boy and a five year old girl. They would be placed with Jim and Blair for a year and then with the right paperwork, they would be able to adopt at the end of the year. For right now they would be foster parents. 

The 13 month old girl was named Bailey, the three year old boy was named Benjamin and the five year old girl was named Lily. 

Jim and Blair did up a bedroom for each of the children and they adapted well. They couldn’t believe how wonderful life was with children. They went every Sunday to Grampa Ellison’s for dinner and watched football. Little Ben was quite the football fan and Lily knew how to shake her little pom poms like crazy while they watched the game. William took many videos of his grandchildren. He was quite proud. Tyler fit right in with them right away. 

Blair had a wonderful nursery set up off of his office with the nanny. Things were working out really well. They enlarged his apartment and made it into a two bedroom, living room, kitchen, dining room and two bathrooms. Ben and Bailey spent every day there with the Nanny, named Carol. Carol lived in the apartment. Carol saw to it that Ben was already doing work on the computer and Bailey was doing beginning work on the computer with colors, numbers and letters. Carol was very good for the children. She was teaching them things, that Blair never dreamed they could learn at that age. Lily was in Kindergarten and was doing quite well. She only went half a day and then Carol picked her up and she stayed at the apartment until Blair was done working. It was all working out quite well. 

Jim came and picked up the kids early one day so that Carol could have some extra time off and Jim took the kids shopping for new shoes and jackets. Jim had all three of the kids in the basket and wouldn’t let them out of his sight. Women were trying to pick Jim up right and left. Jim realized that it must be a turn on to have a single father hanging around. They didn’t know that Jim belonged to Blair or they never would have even looked. Jim wasn’t going to bring this up to Blair at all. He was no fool. 

The kids called Jim, daddy and Blair, papa. They learned that very quickly. Within three months the kids acted like they had been with Jim and Blair most of their lives. 

The courts came out once every three months to check the status of the home and the children and Jim and Blair always rated in the top percentile. They were showing everyone that two men can become parents and do a good job of it. 

On Jim’s day off during the week, he always took the kids to the station so everyone could see how big they were getting. They especially loved, Uncle Simon, Uncle Joel, Uncle Henri and Uncle Rafe but their favorite person in the world was Auntie Megan. Everyone was wild about the Sandburg-Ellison children, and rightly so. They were fantastic kids. When he was done he would head home and start a nice dinner because every Tuesday grampa Ellison came over for dinner. Jim enjoyed having him over and liked that his father was becoming so close to the children. Sometimes Steven, Pam and Tyler would come too. It just depended on who was off and when. They had become a close-knit family and Jim didn’t know if he could ever repay Blair for talking him into seeing his family again. It had turned out to be one of the greatest things he had ever done. It was one more thing that Jim owed Blair Sandburg for. 

Bailey, Ben and Lily all loved their cousin Tyler and they loved playing over in grampa’s back yard once a week at least. They played at each other’s houses too. Pam and Steven were waiting to adopt another child to add to their family. This time they were told, it might be a baby. 

Megan and Joel got married and Megan was pregnant with their first child. She was due any day. She was going to take her baby to Carol too. That’s where Tyler went also. It turned out to be a wonderful place for day care. But it was more like a school. The children learned more then they would have at regular day care. Carol was fantastic and had a helper three times a week, so that she didn’t get over run by the kiddo’s. 

Blair really missed his mother, but he had decided that she was a destructive force and he didn’t want her around the children. So they had never met gramma Naomi. Blair sent pictures to her from time to time, but she knew that Blair wasn’t going to talk to her for six months, so she was waiting patiently. Blair realized one day that if Jim made it without his mom, Blair could make without his too, although, Jim was trying to get Blair to ask his mother to come for a visit soon. Blair had to think that over. He wished he could forgive her for everything but he wasn’t that big hearted. Jim promised him that he could do it. 

One night Jim and Blair lay in bed and Jim said, “Can you believe that 18 months ago, I was thinking about ending my life? I thought there was no where to go and no one to understand me. Then I met you. You turned me around and made my life worth living. You taught me how to accept my gifts and use them wisely and I almost always do use them wisely. And since then we’ve become a family. Now we even have children. I never would have guessed that this is how our lives would have turned out. Thank you, Blair.”

“You are welcome, Jim. Now go to sleep, you’re getting sappy again.”

&&&&&&&&&&

Jim woke up the next morning, very early and stared into little Lily’s eyes. “Hi Lily, honey, what’s wrong?”

“Can I sleep with you and papa?” Lily said on the verge of tears. 

“I don’t know. Just a minute and let me ask papa. Papa, could you wake up, I have a question for you.”

Blair looked at the clock and said, “For crying out loud Jim, its 4:00 in the morning. What are you waking me up for now?”

“Lily wants to know if she can sleep with us,” Jim said quickly. 

Blair sat up straight in bed and said, “What’s wrong, Lily? Did you have a bad dream?”

“Yes, I dreamed that my old mommy and daddy were crying for us because they couldn’t find us anywhere. They looked at our old house, but we didn’t live there anymore,” Lily said tearfully. 

“Come on. You can sleep with us tonight, but we can’t make a habit of it. Okay?” Blair asked. 

“Okay, thank you, papa. Can I sleep in the middle?”

“Sure,” Jim said as he lifted her into the middle of the bed. 

She curled up against Blair and went to sleep almost immediately. 

“I didn’t know what to do. We never covered this problem in our talks. So I had to wake you up,” Jim explained. 

“It’s fine. Go back to sleep. She’s fine now,” Blair said as he blew a kiss to Jim and rolled on his side to go back to sleep. 

They had all just gotten to sleep again when Ben walked into the room. There was no questioning, he just jumped up on the bed and curled up next to Jim. Jim said, “It’s all right. Did you have a bad dream?”

“No, I heard Lily get in bed with you and I didn’t want to sleep by myself.”

“This time it’s fine, but we don’t always get to sleep with papa and daddy. Okay?” Jim asked. 

His answer was a soft snore and Blair looked over at him and said, “I think we let this get out of control already.”

“It’s going to take a long while to get over the loss of their parents. It’s only been a few months. We have to give them more time. Now all we need is Bailey to wake up,” Jim said smiling. 

And as if on cue, Bailey started crying. Ben said, “Daddy, Bailey is crying.”

“Yeah, I heard her, Ben, thanks.” Jim walked into the nursery and picked her up and saw what the problem was. She was soaked. He changed her and got her in clean jammies and put her back into the crib and rubbed her temples until she fell asleep again. Jim then left the room and got back in bed. 

“Daddy, was Bailey all right?” Ben asked. 

“Yes, she was just wet. I changed her and she is sleeping again. Now let’s do the same thing,” Jim suggested. 

“I have to go pottie and I’m afraid,” Ben said. 

Jim sighed, got out of bed again and looked at the other two in the bed sound to sleep and was jealous. He walked with Ben to the bathroom and waited while he went and then washed his hands. 

“Daddy, could you read me a book?”

“No Ben, it’s time for sleeping now.”

Ben got back into the big bed and he whispered, “This bed is biiiiiiiiigggggg.”

Jim snickered. He couldn’t help it. “Now it’s time to go back to sleep.”

“Papa, why is Ben sleeping with us and why is he awake?” Lily asked. 

“He had a bad dream too. Now let’s all go to sleep,” Blair said sternly. 

“Are you mad at us, papa?” Lily asked sweetly. 

“No, never mad, just tired. We have to work in the morning. So it would be nice if we could get some sleep before we have to get up,” Blair explained. 

“Daddy, I need a drink now,” Ben pleaded. 

“I think you had enough to drink, Ben.”

“Please, daddy? I’m thirsty,” Ben begged. 

Jim got up out of the bed and Lily said, “I’m going to get a drink too, daddy.”

Jim walked them into the kitchen, turned on the night light and got them each a bottle of water. They bought the little bottles, so they didn’t go to waste before they recycled them. They both drank the entire bottle and then Lily said, “Could we read a book, daddy?”

“No, we’re going back to sleep,” Jim said as he took both of their hands and pulled them towards the bedroom. If luck was on his side, he might get in one hour of sleep before it was time to get up.”

They all lay in the bed and Lily said, “Oops, daddy, I forgot to go pottie.”

Jim got up once again while Blair slept soundly and took her to the bathroom. When they got back into bed, she said, “Thank you, daddy. You’re a very good daddy.”

“I like you too, daddy,” Ben said softly. 

“I love both of you like crazy. Now let’s get some sleep,” Jim said sternly this time. 

Jim was just about to doze off when Lily said, “I don’t remember my daddy anymore. Is that bad?”

“No honey, it’s not bad. It’s because you’re young. You can’t remember anything when you’re little,” Jim explained. 

“Grampa said that you can’t remember a lot of things when you’re old either,” Lily pointed out. 

“It’s the same with when you’re young and when you’re old.” Jim hoped that would be the end of it. 

“So you and papa must remember a lot of things,” Lily added. 

“When we aren’t tired. I’m so tired now, I can’t remember anything,” Jim said. 

“Well, go to sleep then, daddy.”

Jim looked over at Ben and he was finally sound to sleep. Jim rubbed Lily’s temples like he did with Bailey and she was out within minutes. He looked at the clock and realized that he only had 45 minutes left before it was time to get up. _Yes, he had chosen this life. Why? Because he was a sadist._

Jim no sooner got to sleep and the alarm went off. “Jim, shut that off before you wake the kids,” Blair said. 

Jim sighed, shut the alarm off and got out of bed. He would go ahead and take his shower, so he could start breakfast and get the kids up early that day. Maybe Simon would let Jim off early to take a nap. Hell, he would settle for Simon’s office. That sofa was mighty comfy. 

Blair was still sleeping when Jim came out of the shower and he thought it was most unfair. Next time, he was going to have Blair sleep on that side of the bed. 

Jim made a nice breakfast. Then he got Bailey up, gave her a bath and got her ready for daycare. Ben came walking into the room and said, “Hi daddy. I slept with you last night. Did you member?”

“Yes, I remembered. But you can’t sleep with us all the time, Ben. Just now and then. That bed is only for me and papa.”

“But it’s a biiiiiiiigggggg bed, daddy. Who else sleeps there?” Ben asked. 

Jim laughed, picked Ben up and said, “How about getting ready for school?”

“Okay, can I pick my jeans out today?”

“Yes, Ben you can pick out whatever you want to wear.” Jim went to get Lily and Blair up for breakfast. Neither of them wanted to leave the warm bed. Jim wanted to kick both of them on the butt. 

Jim walked out and laughed when he saw what Ben was wearing for school. He had on lime green pants and a bright purple tee shirt. It was so comical that Jim had to laugh. 

Blair walked into the kitchen and said, “Jim, what were you thinking when you got him dressed?”

“Papa, I got to dress myself today,” Ben said all proudly. 

“You gonna tell him differently?” Jim dared him. 

“Someone is grouchy this morning,” Blair said as he walked over to the coffee pot. 

“Someone didn’t get back to sleep last night because of all of the drama going on around here. Next time, you’re sleeping on that side of the bed,” Jim assured him. 

During breakfast, Blair said, “From now on, we don’t sleep with daddy and papa. Understood? You have your own rooms and we have ours. We don’t sleep in your room, so you don’t sleep in ours.”

Lily said, “You could sleep with me, papa. I would love that.”

“No, Lily, we have our own bed, just like you do. So from now on, everyone sleeps in their own bed.”

“I liked sleeping with daddy. He was up with me all night,” Ben said. 

“Well, daddy doesn’t know when to say no. Now like I said, from now on you sleep in your own beds,” Blair said softly as to not scare them. 

The kids all went into their rooms to play while Blair and Jim got the kitchen cleaned up and ready to go. 

“There are going to be many more days like this. I’m not sure if I like the idea or hate it,” Jim said. 

“I like it. It just proves that they are comfortable with us and we’re their new parents. Everything will be fine Jim. Tonight you’ll get more sleep and you’ll be happier tomorrow.”

“Blair, I am happy. I love you and the kids more then anything in the world. Thank you for showing me the way to become a whole person. I love you.”

Blair kissed him and said, “We better get going. You take Lily to school and I’ll take the little ones to day care. See you tonight.”

“Have a good day, Blair.”

“You too, Jim. I know you’re tired, so maybe Simon will let you come home early,” Blair suggested. 

“I already thought of that. Jim leaned down and gave Blair one more kiss before he got Lily. She had to kiss everyone goodbye and then she and Jim got into the SUV. 

Blair got the little ones ready and got them into his Buick. 

Blair smiled all the way to work. He loved having a family and he knew that Jim did too. 

Things were going to be perfect. 

The end


End file.
